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Everytime it has happened its been a bonding experience.
But I guess maybe perhaps because I am the mothering type in real life that everyone comes to me with their problems. I consider myself a guardian of my friends.
Yes, I would want to know so I could kick his cheating rear to the curb.
So many conflicting messages on CD. If your spouse cheated, would you really kick him/her to the curb, or fight like hell to make the marriage work? You hear a lot of people say cheating is the cardinal sin, the one thing that would make them leave a spouse, but then you hear from those who have forgiven and moved on.
Sunnydee, and anyone else, would you really kick him/her to the curb after one infidelity? Whether it's 20 years of marriage or 1? What are the factors involved? Kids? Finances? History?
I personally would not. As much as I love the ideal of monogomy, and I understand that it exists in some -- even many -- relationships, is it really a deal/vow-breaker? (For the purposes of this post, I am not referring to habitual philanderers or addicts, but someone who gets caught up in an unexpected relationship or one-time fling.)
Of course, I'd want to be told. In fact, my slimy ex-husband made a pass at my best friend when I was resting in the next room! I didn't find out about it until we were on the brink of divorce, and then for some strange reason, he confessed. When I confronted her about it, she said she didn't want to tell me because she was afraid it would wreck my marriage. What marriage?? If I couldn't trust him to keep his hands off my best friend, we didn't even have a marriage! Her silence really hurt me, almost more than his disgusting behavior.
By the way, his confession was what sealed the deal for me. I got my divorce, and I never looked back.
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