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I just fell "heads over heels" for a Caucasian woman who is 19 years younger than me(I'm 53, she's 34) : is it taboo for an average bloke today ? -I'm no Boris Becker who has a new wife (only)16 years younger-I don't have his looks nor his money....
Can only the very rich have a relationship with younger women , and is the only solution for the average guy is to go look for a wife in Asia or africa?(not my cup of tea)
I don't want to move forward before I 'm sure it is socially acceptable and won't cause problems later (different age group in the circle of friends for instance...)
I don't think the age difference should be of anybody's concern. You didn't go out to fall in love with a person 20 years younger than me. You went out and fell in love with a man. The age shouldn't matter at all. Somebody else says something about it? That's their problem! Just go out and enjoy each other! If somebody says something? Fine! If they don't? Fine!
Actually, kygman, I'm the man, and I fell for a 19 years younger female.
But what makes me uneasy is not only the age difference.
It's the feeling that if something happened with this lady, I would somehow steal her youth and the possibility she could have to be romantically involved with someone her age, which is the ideal situation I think.
first of all it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks. Live your life the way you want!!! Who ever doesn't like it should shut up or leave!! It is really that simple.
I don't think it is okay for an older man(woman) to date a yonger woman (man) if the younger person is younger than 25. i'm 25 and I still think it is possible for someone who is significant older to have the ability to manipulate or take advantage of me especially if they seem nice or you fall in lust. I'm not saying that is the case for all or that it doesn't happen regardless. But for me I think that the chances are greater for these things to happen.
I find it creepy when guys in their 40's are trying to get my attention especially since I look younger than 25. How can they ignore the fact that I could be their daughter?!?!
It's human nature to judge people. We do it all the time and don't even realize we're doing it. Some of us have what I like to call a "filter" and some of us don't. Those who don't usually will just say what's on their mind no matter who the company is and what the topic is (me). Those with filters will quietly watch a situation or a person or people and think to themselves whatever thoughts they have but would never dream of saying it out loud.
This is life. People judge, we just do. If you are happy and healthy in the relationship then why not? If your parents are going to freak out just remind them that it's your happiness that they want and if you are happy then why would they judge you? That's what I would say if I were you and they flipped their wig on me. On the other hand, if they flip out, you can also tell them it's your life, you are an adult and it's what you want so just don't worry about it.
You have to play that card when it comes up. If his parents adore you and you two are happy - then who cares if your parents freak out? Will they deny you and tell you to never speak to them again? I mean hey, parents get disappointed, it happens but you can't live your life once you're an adult worrying about if your parents are going to approve. At some point, you have to have enough confidence in what you do to know that YOU are good with the situation and if they can't be then that's on them.
Ya know?
I don't know your ages and didn't read through all of the posts - my only concern about the situation would be if you planned on having kids together with such a drastic age difference. I have heard that such age differences typically do not work out long term (meaning several years) but ya'll seem to be doing okay so far so maybe you'll teach us something new.
Incidentally, my fiance is 7 years my junior, I'm a woman.
"I find it creepy when guys in their 40'sare trying to get my attention especially since I look younger than 25. How can they ignore the fact that I could be their daughter?"
Interesting. But when a guy in his (early, admitted) 50's -me-tries to get the attention of a young lady in her (middle) 30's, is it really that different ?
I can't get over the fact that the age difference between that lady and I -19 years- is the same that between my mother and me (she got me at 19, admittedly very young).
It's not a ridiculous age difference, but still....
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