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I cant imagine anything more fabulous and sexy than a pretty intelligent artistic sensitive prince charming! Macho men? They are all gay dudes working out at the gym! Dont you know that?
That's funny man, but more often than not, very true.
I came upon this thread...and it's interesting to me. My father left our family when I was 4. The next 6 years I was raised with my mother and sister...my sister was my best and only friend. So, her friends were my friends and I played what they played. I had no male role model. When I was with other males (especially in school) I felt isolated and different...like I wasn't *normal*. I remember thinking "why don't I want to get that football"? I had no desire for sports.
Because I acted like my sister and mother (having no male role model) people would tell me that I was gay and if I denied it...they would tell me I was in DENIAL and in the closet. They kept pecking and hackeling me till one day I said "I AM GAY"!! I went through enounter after encounter and subjected myself to embarrassingly sexual acts all in the name of CONFIRMING what OTHERS said about me. I bought into the lie.
I am not gay...I am a "queen" or "drama-queen" because I grew up with women and not men. This is an imbalance (that I work on all the time). I do not want a male/female relationship because at my age *now*...I'm just too use to being single.
I resent those who told me I was GAY (and their ridicule in my denial)...and then resent the spirit that made me feel content to accept the mass opinions!
That I act womanish at times is my upbringing not the definition of who I am. I am a man, I like being a man, I don't want to be a woman or even treated like one.
I appreciate the feminine side that I'm in contact with....I wish I had a more masculine side to draw from but I am what I am...but I know for certain that I am not gay!
JMHO, but sometimes society artificially "conditions" (straight) males, not to excessively display many of the emotional traits typically referred to as "feminine".
My own personal theory as to why? B/c soft, "feminine" straight men are simply obviously not gonna make good soldiers, in the event of a war. Ever wondered why young male children are given plastic soldiers and toy war machines to play with, as young children? That's why -- intentional social conditioning, for future prospective war. And to add insult to injury, many females are also artificially conditioned not to like these kind of men anyway, even if a few guys can actually escape the "programming box" (a la Matrix style)
ETA: If there were no wars at all whatsoever, and no emotional programming propaganda, I would wager that "feminine" straight males would actually be heavily in demand, and very popular.
Last edited by Phoenix2017; 06-19-2011 at 06:19 PM..
Reason: Corrected typos / Adds
Ehhhh, that depends on how feminine were talking. If he's feminine to the point where he acts gay, then no. It would make me question if he was bi or a closet gay. But if it's just a little feminine to the point where he still seems a little masculine, then yes. I like a bit of a balance.
JMHO, but sometimes society artificially "conditions" (straight) males, not to excessively display many of the emotional traits typically referred to as "feminine".
Both genders are kind of expected to conform to certain standards and the more you deviate from those standards, the more you'll be ridiculed. A guy who's sensitive or takes too much pride in his appearance will be labeled girly. A girl who's very tomboyish will be accused of being a lesbian. We live in a culture that tells people to be themselves and yet we also seem to frown on people who are too different. Go figure.
This is absolutely ridiculous to me. Do you honestly believe there is no essential difference between masculine and feminine natures. How do you explain the existence of the masculine before the state and all the wars that follow?
I also enjoy the fact that you ignore that just the opposite is possible -- that in fact our society may very well be undervaluing and destroying men's natural masculine cores and influencing them against "intentional social conditioning" via... MORE intentional social conditioning.
I can't believe the arrogance in assuming that this duality is a problem to be fixed only caused by society's social conditioning. It's just like the arrogance involved in extrapolating short term climate trends and then screaming about a crisis so that others will listen to your interest group.
Is it your honest belief that absent society, that is without any structure save survival in the face of death all around in the wilderness, that there would be no masculine or feminine contrasts?
Plain BS.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Knight2009
JMHO, but sometimes society artificially "conditions" (straight) males, not to excessively display many of the emotional traits typically referred to as "feminine".
My own personal theory as to why? B/c soft, "feminine" straight men are simply obviously not gonna make good soldiers, in the event of a war. Ever wondered why young male children are given plastic soldiers and toy war machines to play with, as young children? That's why -- intentional social conditioning, for future prospective war. And to add insult to injury, many females are also artificially conditioned not to like these kind of men anyway, even if a few guys can actually escape the "programming box" (a la Matrix style)
ETA: If there were no wars at all whatsoever, and no emotional programming propaganda, I would wager that "feminine" straight males would actually be heavily in demand, and very popular.
this thread is very hard hitting. i was an emffeminate boy when i was growing up. i was into typical boy things (wrestling, trucks, cars, etc) or whatever but i acted real feminine like. this gave people the wrong impression now when i think about it because one of my childhood friends asked if i was gay at one point back in the 4th grade. i also remember at one time getting my eyes checked at this shop and the eyeglasses lady happened to tell me that i should take the pink glasses case instead of the blue one (pretty much suggesting that i was gay). i got a rude awakening when i was 12 before i turned 13 when my older brother at summer day camp pretty much told me what the "real world" thinks about guys that act girly and to stop doing stuff like putting my hands underneath my legs, having my hand limp wrists and stuff like that. so i started to act more masculine where i stopped the same emffeminate behaviors i was accustomed to doing. now that i think of it, it was probably the right thing to do but at the same time, i kind of feel like i was giving into society norms. but now when i think about it, that kind of spared me a whole bunch of trouble before i hit high school because i probably would have been misunderstood and bullied and stuff. instead, i ended up being left alone, out of the danger zone and stuff. plus i saw that that feminine guy stuff wasn't going to get me any play and i should man up. i pretty much had some girls throwing their cooch at me but i didn't take advantage of that. something that i'm still learning to do with my social awkward self.
you shouldn't judge a guy by her masculine or feminine he acts.
I think you ought to be careful here. Maybe it's true that more girls who are masculine enough to be on a forum analytically approaching things like this as problems to be solved (brain works kind of like a man) like "guys like you."
Undoubtedly, however, guys like you are not inevitably better partners. You are right -- you sound conceited. While "society is doing it" is a good excuse when many don't agree with you, you are unable to see that the opposite may be true, and that you may have been the one moved by society.
I'd like to suggest to you that you don't understand what masculinity really is. Liking sports may be more masculine than feminine, but does it really define masculinity? Undoubtedly no. I'd like to ask you what you find so abhorrent about the masculine. The claim that masculine men don't make great partners is patently absurd, and I would think is an attack based primarily on the fact that you're insecure about having a more middling sexual essence (which by the way is fine; you probably just prefer a similarly middling sexual essence in your partner rather than an especially feminine woman).
I think one of the major emerging problems in the West is the misunderstanding and desire to analyze and "fix" masculinity and femininity.
I asked my Ukrainian wife one time if she were a man would she still like men. Her response was "of course not! If I were a man I would like women!"
I think that may be a valuable piece of wisdom for some of you about the extent of the "societal influence" that leads to this conversation even existing on this board.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DoctorRain
I knew it! More girls like guys like me!
The things you speak of in your boyfriend is much like I am even if I came off like a conceited person sometimes. Guys like me make better partners and this is why I feel I have a reason to tell those that who make a bad choice.
I often shudder at complete masculinity honestly. I am the flaky eccentric "gay" looking guy.
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