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Old 09-20-2008, 06:03 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
15,318 posts, read 13,615,696 times
Reputation: 21558
Default I am upset about a relationship between sister, and adopted brother

My ex says its because its the way his family is.....but I see more into it.
I got on her my space page.....she has pics of most all of her family, except my son. Hmmm.... I see this, and get upset, because for one thing, they aren`t close. They only see each other once a year, at Christmas. My ex says thats the way their family is, but when I see pics of her half sister plastered all over her my space, plus a comment made by her, saying..."I can`t believe you didn`t put your own sister as number 1 on your friends list, then not see any pics of him...it upsets me.
I realize its only a my space page.....my ex says she is only thinking of her party friends, etc... but she has a pic of her Dad on there. Where is a pic of her brother?
I know.....maybe I am just being paranoid, but since he is adopted...I wish they were closer....just because he is not going to have the contact with his real brother, and half sister.
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Old 09-20-2008, 06:19 PM
 
Location: Hot Springs, AR
5,612 posts, read 9,118,001 times
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It's her MySpace and if she doesn't feel close to him (seeing someone only once a year can do that) I can see why she wouldn't include him. Only people I am close to are on my MySpace page. If you are so upset about how distant they are, why don't you arrange for them to spend more time together? Or maybe neither one of them considers the other a great loss. And you should stay off her MySpace and leave it alone.
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Old 09-20-2008, 06:34 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
15,318 posts, read 13,615,696 times
Reputation: 21558
Your right. I ask my ex about it, and he said, thats just the way it is....
I guess I would have hoped that, that she would have one pic of him on there somewhere amonst the rest of her family, and friends...guess i was wrong. I talked to my ex about why they aren`t very close and he said its because of her age, and his age...big diffrence.....and also because they live so far away. Hmmmm... I would only think that, that would want her to reach out more to him.
I always remember her as being the jealous, selfish, type when she was younger. I hope to shout, that she has matured in her day.....
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Old 09-20-2008, 07:04 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
15,318 posts, read 13,615,696 times
Reputation: 21558
They have never been close......he is alot closer to his aunt, than he is to her, but I bow my head in shame. I guess because he has a real brother out there somewhere, thats a year and a half younger than him, that he has no idea about, and also a half sister who is 16 now. He can`t possibly get close to them....so why doesn`t she offer to step up to the plate.....take over. Ya` know? Be a bigger sister, whom wants to be close to her adopted brother? Not....give him a gift at Christmas, say hello, give a warm hug, and leave, then not see him or speak to him again until next year? WTF???
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Old 09-21-2008, 09:58 AM
 
Location: Hot Springs, AR
5,612 posts, read 9,118,001 times
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Being close is something that people grow up with. If the children weren't raised as close siblings they aren't going to be close now esp if they only see each other once a year. It's not something that's going to happen during adolescence. She has made it obvious that she doesn't consider him a member of her family. How does he feel about her?

My mother and her sister have a large age gap and in their adult years they've tried to be closer, but it just isn't there. (My mother tries a lot harder than my aunt)

Why is it so important for them to be close now?
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Old 09-22-2008, 02:19 AM
 
25,170 posts, read 32,302,454 times
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you are griping about what someone does on a myspace website?
Ugh, myspace and facebook is so childish, shallow, and useless.
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Old 09-22-2008, 04:21 AM
YBF
 
Location: Atlanta, Ga
1,260 posts, read 1,987,784 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
you are griping about what someone does on a myspace website?
Ugh, myspace and facebook is so childish, shallow, and useless.
I thought the same thing. I mean really..... its her page and she can do or dont do whatever she wants. The OP sounds like a child, IMO. When I first saw this thread I thought it was going to be about an adopted brother and sister having an intimate relationship.
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Old 09-22-2008, 05:06 AM
 
Location: Tennessee
15,318 posts, read 13,615,696 times
Reputation: 21558
Quote:
Originally Posted by YBF View Post
I thought the same thing. I mean really..... its her page and she can do or dont do whatever she wants. The OP sounds like a child, IMO. When I first saw this thread I thought it was going to be about an adopted brother and sister having an intimate relationship.
What a sick mind you have!
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Old 09-22-2008, 05:18 AM
 
Location: Tennessee
15,318 posts, read 13,615,696 times
Reputation: 21558
Quote:
Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
you are griping about what someone does on a myspace website?
Ugh, myspace and facebook is so childish, shallow, and useless.
Yeah, it is....but it still hurts. Thats ok..
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Old 09-22-2008, 08:27 AM
 
335 posts, read 693,441 times
Reputation: 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by yankeegirl313 View Post
They have never been close......he is alot closer to his aunt, than he is to her, but I bow my head in shame. I guess because he has a real brother out there somewhere, thats a year and a half younger than him, that he has no idea about, and also a half sister who is 16 now. He can`t possibly get close to them....so why doesn`t she offer to step up to the plate.....take over. Ya` know? Be a bigger sister, whom wants to be close to her adopted brother? Not....give him a gift at Christmas, say hello, give a warm hug, and leave, then not see him or speak to him again until next year? WTF???
I have myspace too. And most of my family pic consist of my twin sister, her son, and very few of my mom and lil sister. I don't have much if any of my brothers. Even though I love them and what not I don't see them much. They are much older than us. We didn't grow up with them in the house and they didn't hang out with us. Lots of my friends get surprised when we mention nephews, a niece and brothers because we barely speak about our brothers. Not because we don't love or like them but because we rarely see them. They are grown men with their own lives. And I am sure to them we were their baby sisters. A different generation. Nothing much in commom with them expect for family.

On my father side I have a sister. I know nothing about her. And like you I thought that because she was older that she should look for us. She should take the lead and seek us out. It doesn't bother me at all that she hasn't done this. Actually I forget I have another sister.

Anyways you should ask your son how he feels about this. Maybe he doesn't even realize it. If YOU want them to be closer YOU should make the first move to make this happen. they are probably too caught up in their own lives to even realized.
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