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i can't believe this..we sprnt this evening together, at her request, dvd movie, had a great time. then she gets to talking about this recurring dream she used to have, and made this comment about how the dream meant she was ready to move on to the next phase of her life, and that she's not had the dream since. wtf, timing was terrible for my ego...
I'm sure a big part of her maintaining a friendly relationship with you is also because you are the father to her children and it much healthier for your kids to see you two getting along. Please do not quit AA. It is way too soon for you to thing you have this disease handled and can go it alone. I hope you don't go into denial mode. Also, you are in what I would call the "honeymoon" phase. You are both living in seperate dwellings and have your own lives without the pressure there was before so you are getting along better and also because she sees you making the effort by going to the meetings. Do you think she would be as social if you stopped going? I wouldn't. Three months is not a long time to be seperated. My husband and I actually went through with our divorce which was wicked horrible but four months after the divorce was final and met with him alone for the first time and had coffee with him to hear him out about his feelings. It took that long to be able to sit across from him after the things he did but for my son's sake I felt it important to lay down the arms and try and have a relationship of some sort, plus I was seeing someone else by that time. Long story short, I saw that he was willing to make the effort to change, understood the harm that he had caused and had a chance to see what he had lost. We remarried a year later and will be celebrating our seven years being back together next week totally 17 years.
oh my God! i would give any amount of time back to know we could be together forever. do you see light at the end of this tunnel. what advice would you give. my moods are up, and down.
oh my God! i would give any amount of time back to know we could be together forever. do you see light at the end of this tunnel. what advice would you give. my moods are up, and down.
You should just try to focus on making yourself better right now and staying better. And focus on staying a good dad. I'm sorry this is so hard to deal with, just please don't relapse. You should call your sponser to help you through this.
carlita...
i've made my peace with God, i'm never going to relapse. i just want her to know that i'm not bs, i'm for real and i don't want her to give up on us. why all the together time unless she's thinking about it?
IMHO never date somebody that is thinking about suing you. FYI 42 million divorces since 1975 (start of no fault) 75% filed by women. are you feeling lucky.
carlita...
i've made my peace with God, i'm never going to relapse. i just want her to know that i'm not bs, i'm for real and i don't want her to give up on us. why all the together time unless she's thinking about it?
I don't know, I'm not her. Maybe she did it to keep things civil in front of the kids. Maybe she did it because there may be a chance to get back together. I don't really know. All I know is how I would react in her situation but not everyone reacts like me.
ok, looking for validation. you..what would be your motivation for spending so much time with me? cuz she does. lots.
You don't want to go by my experience. I mean a lot of women are a lot nicer than I am when they have been wronged. I would be doing it for the kids. And I would be there to make sure you were sober and still working your program. But that is me and I'm not her. The only way to know what SHE is thinking is to ask her. Just make sure you ask her in a nonconfrontational or uncomfortable way.
ok, looking for validation. you..what would be your motivation for spending so much time with me? cuz she does. lots.
Btw, voivod, I'm curious to know what kind of drinking is considered a problem because I believe the judging in this department in this country has gone to excess just like anything else. I'm sure in the eyes of many I might be a rehab material, too, as I have a beer or two or a glass of wine or two with my dinners on a regular basis and some hard liquor about once a week. So, what drinking are we talking about?
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