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Well, if it really is bugging you this much tell her that you find it offensive....if my hubby ever asked me to cool it on the friendly thing I would in a heart beat because he matters that much to me. He knows it's just my personality though so it hasn't been an issue. Tell her, tell her it bothers you and makes you feel disrespected. If she doesn't cool it then maybe that's a deeper sign that she doesn't really take you seriously.
I have to say, if I am really committed to someone I totally avoid this aggressive flirting behavior you refer to. If I'm not, I don't. But that is just me ; )
And just to clarify, I'm very big on eye contact. Sort of a survival technique from growing up small and female in the ghetto. What I am referring to in above post is eye contact with attractive men in relatively safe surroundings.
If her looking at other people offends you, then maybe you should give her a nice box for Christmas to live in. You can put it in the laundry room next to the kitty litter box.
DJ, It doesn't sound like the OP is offended by his wife looking at other people, but making and keeping eye contact beyond the initial glance. The OP wrote that men either smile or say hi to her. It sounds like he's concerned with them making eye contact and the length since it draws an occasional verbal response from guys that he thinks are flirting with his wife or reacting to her perceived flirting.
My comedy just isn't working tonight I guess, lol.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cougargm
DJ, It doesn't sound like the OP is offended by his wife looking at other people, but making and keeping eye contact beyond the initial glance. The OP wrote that men either smile or say hi to her. It sounds like he's concerned with them making eye contact and the length since it draws an occasional verbal response from guys that he thinks are flirting with his wife or reacting to her perceived flirting.
Hello theroadlesstravelled: I think it is something to worry about, because:
1) Even you yourself know this is not normal for most married women to behave this way - that is already a red flag
2) Alot of cheating starts off as innocent and escalates in time
3) It is disrepectful to you
I would definintely advise talking to your wife about this - it obviously bothers you and she should modify her behavior - you are her husband. Let me emphasize that - YOU are her husband - not anyone else. If she wants to be all "friendly" - she can save that for you or family.
We all know she is seeking attention by doing this. Whether she is fulfilling some fantasy in her mind I do not know, but it does not matter. The men she smiles at definitely know she is being abnormally friendly and will think "hmmmmm..."
This has the potiential of big-time trouble. Nip it.
I know what I am talking about because I am very wise when it comes to behaviour. Trust me. All others who say this is no big deal are wrong. In marriage, if one partner is uncomfortable with something it should be addressed and resolved - not left to lester.
If this situation were reversed, I would say the exact same thing.
I do hope things work out - if you are not going to church I would definitely start going with your wife. The bible has much to say when it comes to a relationship between a married couple. Going to church helps to emphasize the relationship and bonds in a friendly and educational way. I am not "religious," but know truth and appreciate it when I see it. Going to a church helps to do that. And most ministers, pastors, etc. will counsel you for free on any issues, problems, questions. They can serve as an unbaised third party.
I usually get angry when people make any eye-contact with me just walking by me on the street, but then, im an abrasive person.
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