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Old 10-13-2008, 06:05 PM
 
Location: Coachella Valley, California
15,639 posts, read 40,938,595 times
Reputation: 13467

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I wanted to rep Mrs. Stewart for that comment cuz I thought it was funny too - but again, I have to spread the love! I guess it's the thought that counts.

 
Old 10-13-2008, 08:56 PM
 
Location: Miami, FL
3,440 posts, read 5,700,238 times
Reputation: 2264
Wow, some unsatisfied housewives on here. Hmmm, why would a husband not take out the trash on time? That's stupid and just plain laziness. I cannot cook to save my soul, so I would prefer to take my future wife to romantic dinners to show her how much I love her.

Men and women need to LISTEN to one another. To the ladies, men things from you as well. Us guys need more than sex, although that is awesome too.
 
Old 10-13-2008, 09:28 PM
 
27,957 posts, read 39,624,152 times
Reputation: 26197
Quote:
Originally Posted by Black Jack22 View Post
Wow, some unsatisfied housewives on here. Hmmm, why would a husband not take out the trash on time? That's stupid and just plain laziness. I cannot cook to save my soul, so I would prefer to take my future wife to romantic dinners to show her how much I love her.

Men and women need to LISTEN to one another. To the ladies, men things from you as well. Us guys need more than sex, although that is awesome too.
It takes a combination of both. If the husband helps out around the house woman like that for some reason. Do the dishes, take out the trash or whatever. DW told me several times its the little things that count.
 
Old 10-13-2008, 09:34 PM
 
Location: Miami, FL
3,440 posts, read 5,700,238 times
Reputation: 2264
Quote:
Originally Posted by rjl78 View Post
It takes a combination of both. If the husband helps out around the house woman like that for some reason. Do the dishes, take out the trash or whatever. DW told me several times its the little things that count.
Of course, men need to help around with the house chores.
 
Old 10-13-2008, 10:23 PM
 
71 posts, read 227,708 times
Reputation: 79
Quote:
Originally Posted by timmy22 View Post
Why is it always Women who File for Divorce?

Just been reading an article about the subject.
Divorce: Women who walk (http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/family/11329451.html - broken link)

Statistics show it is much more likely for the wife
to file for divorce 70% to 30% for the husband.
Why is this ?

Adultery is split 50/50 between the sexes as a
reason to file for divorce,so I know its not that.
So what is it?

Are us Men just so bad at it?

Are a Woman's expectations are just to high?

Doe's anyone here have the answer,or
can some of you ladies give us men some
advice on how to make a marriage work.
Sounds like we need it.
Everyone here keeps mentioning its the little
things like house work that can make a
difference.I think it does, but there must
be more to it than that.Getting back to
answering my origional post

Statistics show it is much more likely for the wife
to file for divorce 70% to 30% for the husband.
Why is this ?

I was hoping to get more divorces on this thread
who would give us a little more insight in what
it was that really made them want to leave their husbands.
Often as the article states,never saw it coming.
To see if there was a common problem.
 
Old 10-13-2008, 10:32 PM
 
Location: southern california
61,289 posts, read 87,144,090 times
Reputation: 55550
Quote:
Originally Posted by timmy22 View Post
Why is it always Women who File for Divorce?

Just been reading an article about the subject.
Divorce: Women who walk (http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/family/11329451.html - broken link)

Statistics show it is much more likely for the wife
to file for divorce 70% to 30% for the husband.
Why is this ?

Adultery is split 50/50 between the sexes as a
reason to file for divorce,so I know its not that.
So what is it?

Are us Men just so bad at it?

Are a Woman's expectations are just to high?

Doe's anyone here have the answer,or
can some of you ladies give us men some
advice on how to make a marriage work.
Sounds like we need it.
actually women do 25% of the adultery but adultery exists in 50% of marriages. why bek no fault divorce decriminalized adultery its a freebee no penalty.
but as to your other 70% sounds bout right, that is in approx 70% of divorces its the woman that files.
why. because she gets a big fat settlement. she is better off after than b4. its an asset download program. reshuffle of assets.
how did this happen? 1974 anti discrimination credit act means in effect now her debts become your debts and on your line of credit.
after 1974 your signature is not required to assign you marital debt.
it can be done without your consent against your will or without your knowledge.
its the law.
and it changed marriage forever. read "how to eat your husband for fun and profit" by judy j tarantula
 
Old 10-14-2008, 07:14 AM
 
Location: Custer, SD
1,582 posts, read 3,099,372 times
Reputation: 1481
Quote:
Originally Posted by timmy22 View Post
...but there must
be more to it than that...
Seriously, there isn't. This is something that doesn't generally start big...it gets that way over many weeks, months or, usually years. And it usually starts with the small stuff...as mentioned, men don't think the same way women do, and vice versa. It takes effort, and women are usually the "givers" in a relationship. And when she begins to feel resentful for being taken for granted or taken advantage of...or when she feels her husband isn't listening (as tempting as it is, guys, don't tune her out when she nags - she is TRYING to get something across to you, but most of us never truly learn how to communicate with each other!), the relationship will eventually take a bad turn.

Sometimes, this isn't the case. Each relationship is different, though I am sure, looking at the sheer number of divorces in this country, there are bound to be trends. But if you are looking at ways to avoid having your marriage become a statistic, do two things: 1)be her best friend (not in the same way as her best girlfriend), and all that would entail AND 2)pay attention to the little things, even if they aren't important to you. You will be amazed at the impact they will have.
 
Old 10-14-2008, 07:49 AM
 
Location: Orlando
8,176 posts, read 18,485,646 times
Reputation: 49864
We almost split up a couple of times and yes it would have been me that would have filed.

He was out of work for about a year and wasn't doing anything about it. If we would talk about it he thought it was all ok....not thinking that if he's not doing anything to solve the problem it's not OK.
He had a roof over his head, food on the table and a wife that came home every night. No problem.
I finally had to say to him..."This is January, you have until the end of February to have a decent job or show me that you've really been looking, or I'm gone!" He was truly shocked! Like we hadn't had this discussion!

The other scenario was similar....the problem was right out in the open!! No question about it! Something only he could solve. I had to threaten again.

Part of the problem is some men like to bury their heads in the sand instead of acknowledging their part of the solution.
 
Old 10-14-2008, 08:18 AM
 
35,998 posts, read 30,525,859 times
Reputation: 32269
Quote:
I was hoping to get more divorces on this thread
who would give us a little more insight in what
it was that really made them want to leave their husbands.
Often as the article states,never saw it coming.
To see if there was a common problem.
Ok Timmy. I filed dh #1. The core reason was his drinking and behavior associated with it. He was immature and irresponsible. Spent too much time away from home. Other than that he was a good guy and I loved him. I didnt find out about the adultry until I had already filed.

DH#2 was more complicated. I believe he developed some type of personally disorder or I just wasnt aware of it for the first year or so. It began with little things. Snide comments, withdrawing as a couple, not comming home for dinner. Gradually, his drinking increased, he became moody, called me all kinds of offensive names, lied about trival things, we stopped doing anything together, then he would go into crazy rages talking crazy and making outlandish accusations. He finially joined AA, went on meds for depression and things got better for awhile. That didnt last long, but I was determined to try and work things out although I had pretty much lost all respect for him and detached emotionally and should have went ahead and filed. After six months of being physically seperated but trying to get him to work on our relationship he filed for divorce.
Does that help?
 
Old 10-14-2008, 08:21 AM
 
Location: syracuse ny
2,412 posts, read 5,073,167 times
Reputation: 2048
Quote:
Originally Posted by Twinkle Toes View Post
It's because in reality men are the ones who want to be married - so they can have an "instant slave" - a woman who cooks and cleans and takes care of him and the kids and the house and everything while they sit back and do nothing. Oh, and we damn well better look like supermodels while we're slaving away too! I always hear men b-itching about how it's the women who want to get married. BS!!! Oh, and I shave my legs!
This may be true on the first go around. In my case it's now not. And I'm experiancing a bunch of people now wanting me to find the right girl which I always thought was a sex in the city girl thing, not a guy thing, but it is my male friends wifes and girlfriends that are the ones who think I'm somehow incomplete.. Why should I when I like to cook, maid service is only about $50 and somehow they get all that slaving done in about 2- 3 hours a week, never complain either

Nope the only complaining is that I cannot possibly be happy and am in some sort of denile.
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