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Old 10-13-2008, 04:54 AM
 
Location: Incognito
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Not agressive as in not taking the initiative?
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Old 10-13-2008, 08:04 AM
 
Location: TwilightZone
5,296 posts, read 6,431,941 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rance View Post
Maybe she wants some flowers every now and then? Or take her out to dinner and a movie? Maybe she wants some sort of sign you really care for her other than wham bam thank you ma'am roll over and snore? Do you ever just hold her and tell her how much you love her? Maybe a massage or run your fingers through her hair? Give it a try sometime...I think you'll be surprised what it'll get ya in the lovin dept.
Been there done that. We go to dinner all the time Btw I've never just 'rolled over and snored'...I'm not that much of a caveman I massage her(b/c she's got back probs),and when I 'run my fingers through her hair' she says that puts her to sleep,so it's hard to win here.
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Old 10-13-2008, 08:05 AM
 
Location: TwilightZone
5,296 posts, read 6,431,941 times
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Originally Posted by Rance View Post
Then why is he still there? He should be posting how he finally dumped the biiiiaaaatch and not how she's picking a fight.
I thought that's what most relationships were...
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Old 10-13-2008, 08:07 AM
 
Location: TwilightZone
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Originally Posted by Mr.Cat View Post
Not agressive as in not taking the initiative?
Correct. Never really been that type and think there's something wrong there.
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Old 10-13-2008, 08:09 AM
 
1,300 posts, read 2,565,686 times
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Maybe her expectations for you are too high for you or she probably felt that you're not romantic enough to be romantic naturally. Since you're now being her theraputist, I don't think you guys have that chemistry.
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Old 10-13-2008, 08:21 AM
 
1,882 posts, read 4,605,247 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StuckPA View Post
Been there done that. We go to dinner all the time Btw I've never just 'rolled over and snored'...I'm not that much of a caveman I massage her(b/c she's got back probs),and when I 'run my fingers through her hair' she says that puts her to sleep,so it's hard to win here.
OUCH, that hurt.

Who said you gotta roll over first anyway?
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Old 10-13-2008, 08:41 AM
 
3,490 posts, read 8,199,661 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mrstewart View Post
Rance, normally I would say "Amen Rance!" but this situation has been going on so long and she is on the "sneaky" side and talks, emails and sends pics to exboyfriends...nothing but bad stuff brewing there!!

How are you Rance??
gotta love it when people form strong opinions and dole out advice based entirely on one side of the story! Especially when the source of the information we are getting is posting about how to score a hot chick despite being married
Sometimes maintaining an open mind instead of blindly believing just one person's version of a story can be more sensible.
Maybe he is the one who is mean, mean, mean. If not, then Rance's advice to hit the road seems sensible to me.
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Old 10-13-2008, 08:54 AM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
973 posts, read 3,294,318 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StuckPA View Post
Ok tonite's issue was regarding 'non-aggressive men'...
Apparently after 6 years of being together,she finally realized that I'm not very aggressive in the romance department. Is she like most women and thought I was going to magically change one day? She knew how I was from day one.
What's with women?
Since there's no description of "non-aggressive" to work with here, I'll just wing it.

From a gal's perspective, perhaps she was well aware that you were "non-aggressive" romantically and was okay with that for a while. Maybe her interests have changed or she just wants to try something different once in a while to spice things up. Nothing wrong with that.

Easiest answer would be to just ask her what she has in mind. Make sure when you have this conversation that it is during a neutral time and in a neutral place. Before, during or after romance isn't a good time. How about this...........
While watching TV one evening, say...."Honey, you've expressed that I'm not very aggressive and I need more clarification so I can try to work with you on this. I can't meet your needs if I don't know what they are so can you give me some examples of what you would like for me to try?"
Listen, be open to suggestions and don't let your manhood feel threatened. Just because somebody is expressing an interest in something different isn't a rejection of you. You and your wife/girlfriend have been together for 6 years and a lot of people feel the need to spice things up at this point. You may end up liking the ideas she has in mind!
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Old 10-13-2008, 08:57 AM
 
Location: TwilightZone
5,296 posts, read 6,431,941 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hobokenkitchen View Post
gotta love it when people form strong opinions and dole out advice based entirely on one side of the story! Especially when the source of the information we are getting is posting about how to score a hot chick despite being married
Sometimes maintaining an open mind instead of blindly believing just one person's version of a story can be more sensible.
Maybe he is the one who is mean, mean, mean.
Gotta love the hypocrasy all around here
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Old 10-13-2008, 09:00 AM
 
13,783 posts, read 26,189,835 times
Reputation: 7445
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hobokenkitchen View Post
gotta love it when people form strong opinions and dole out advice based entirely on one side of the story! Especially when the source of the information we are getting is posting about how to score a hot chick despite being married
Sometimes maintaining an open mind instead of blindly believing just one person's version of a story can be more sensible.
Maybe he is the one who is mean, mean, mean. If not, then Rance's advice to hit the road seems sensible to me.
He may be the one who is mean, mean, mean but she is not here to tell us her side, so while I keep an open mind, we only hear one side.

We are all hear to talk things out and have someone on our side. Nothing we say here will likely make or break a situation. I guess what I am trying to say is, it is not a court of law only a place of reprieve.
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