Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Don't let your gf pressure you in doing things. Your current job does not define you, nor should any job really. I had a friend who worked retail all through graduate school. I also knew of quite a few people who lived with their parents during grad school. You know what? They are now all successful.
Granted living with the 'rents at 26 is not ideal, but can help you out in the long run, assuming you are using this time to save as much as you can.
I don't see any need to get a "better" job now or move into an apartment just to please this girl.
I am curious though, are her comments to you about your job and apartment her trying to motivate you to move on and become more independent? OR does she just find that type of job totally unacceptable out of high school?
Don't let your gf pressure you in doing things. Your current job does not define you, nor should any job really. I had a friend who worked retail all through graduate school. I also knew of quite a few people who lived with their parents during grad school. You know what? They are now all successful.
Granted living with the 'rents at 26 is not ideal, but can help you out in the long run, assuming you are using this time to save as much as you can.
I don't see any need to get a "better" job now or move into an apartment just to please this girl.
I am curious though, are her comments to you about your job and apartment her trying to motivate you to move on and become more independent? OR does she just find that type of job totally unacceptable out of high school?
I think what she was saying is that she is having a hard time pitcuring a future for us because of these things : me living at home, and me working at pizza joint.
Sounds like she is shape-shifting from real reasons at hand. You cannot expect a student to do anymore than the very best that he can, while keeping studies up. Good for you for still living at home during school, that's smart. My son's wishes are to stay at home til 25/26 until he finishes his college to save up his money to put toward a mortgage. I'm all for it. Advice. . . do not change for a woman just for her to like you. We women call that p**sywhipped. You sound like you are on the right path, stay on it.
Location: from houstoner to bostoner to new yorker to new jerseyite ;)
4,084 posts, read 12,640,039 times
Reputation: 1973
Quote:
Originally Posted by JeepGirl118
Sounds like she is shape-shifting from real reasons at hand. You cannot expect a student to do anymore than the very best that he can, while keeping studies up. Good for you for still living at home during school, that's smart. My son's wishes are to stay at home til 25/26 until he finishes his college to save up his money to put toward a mortgage. I'm all for it. Advice. . . do not change for a woman just for her to like you. We women call that p**sywhipped. You sound like you are on the right path, stay on it.
Yeah, if you're going to be finished with college in a year, I don't see what she's got her panties in a twist about. She should be thankful you have a job at all, with the economy the way it is. Maybe this is really about something else, her meeting someone else or just wanting out. What does she do for a living?
I think what she was saying is that she is having a hard time pitcuring a future for us because of these things : me living at home, and me working at pizza joint.
Then she's either an idiot, or is coming up with excuses. There are a lot of people your age living with their parents, while working and going to school to better themselves. You are in your last year of school, and soon, you'll be able to find a better job to support yourself (assuming the economy doesn't completely crumble). You won't be working at the pizza place forever. At least you're working and trying to improve your situation. It would be different if you had no ambition. Does she have all her sh*t together?
You can find someone better who appreciates your hard work.
I think what she was saying is that she is having a hard time pitcuring a future for us because of these things : me living at home, and me working at pizza joint.
Sounds like she is afriad these things aren't going to change even when you finish school? Have you made some detailed plans of what you want your life to look like after you graduate? If not, you should - even if it's just a rough estimate based on what kind of job you can get after graduation. But if she is lacking faith in your motivation and willingness to join the adult world the relationship won't make it, sorry.
My girlfriend of a year and a half told me the ohter day that sheis having trouble picturing a future for the two of us.
Cincyman. To me... this is the bottom line. Be happy for what you had and move on. Two things I see with this:
First - If the only reason she doesn't see a future is because of your lack of a good job and haven't finished school, she could either attribute this to you being lazy, or she just wants someone who's already got a little cash. Either way, she's not liking you for who you are. A job and a degree won't change you inside... and, in my opinion, that's where a future lies.
Second - Do you really want to be with her forever? If not, just enjoy what you had with her. You're only 26... take your time and get your life together. As far away and abstract as it seems now, start thinking about where you want to be when you're 40, 50, 60 or more. Then, start heading that way. When you meet someone who's on the same path as you, that's when you look for something more permanent. You don't even have a long goal yet, so don't expect to lock her (or anyone else) into it either.
everyone is giving great advice here, the only thing I can say is that if she doesnt respect you for doing what you need to do to survive and acknowledge that you are trying to do more with yourself then she doesnt deserve you. I had to work a job getting paid $9/hr when I had a college degree just so I could afford to stick around waiting for grad school to start. No shame in living at home to save money and atleast you are working. I say focus on you- school first. If she cant respect that then its her loss. Oh and a side note, I almost flunked out of college and blew my savings account trying to fly to my boyfriends college and I figuered it was a good investment at the time, that we would be together forever and get married. We ended up breaking up years later but imagine how pissed I would have been if I threw away everything and risked it all just for him. Sfter that I learned I have to start thinkng of me and if someone loves me then they will understand my situation or take a hike
Instead of you saying "I think she means.."Why don't you say TO HER "exactly what does this mean?", with interjections about how you're graduating in a year, I'll be moving out..and so on.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.