don't know what to do.

[carlitasway]

Originally Posted by mir_ny

Honestly if i had a clue I wouldn't have ask for help. Was checking to see if there was anything I could do to help. apparently the only answer is to leave him.

Like i said previously I want to know I did everything possible to make this work. I don't want any what ifs.

Honey, there are always what ifs. It's what life is about. There are no 100% sure things. I would think you would have more what ifs if you stay with him for years and find out nothing has changed. It's not easy to leave someone you love but love isn't always enough.

[mir_ny]

Well I'm not planning on giving him anymore YEARS. He is already on his last warning. If this relationship does end due to lack of change then he is always welcome to hit me up later in life if/when he does. If i explore all options of trying to help him then there aren't any what if to consider should I leave him. And thats the what ifs that are important as of now. I don't consider this relationship a waste of my youth or time. It's MY learning experience that I DECIDED to make and learn from.

[jimboburnsy]

Originally Posted by mir_ny

okay here is the history lesson.

When I met the boyfriend he had a job. When we started seeing each other he quit his job. He was unemployed for a year. Now he has been working at the same job for three years but it's off the books. He is 26. All his stuff is at his mom apt but he stays with me in my shared apt. I'm 25.

Last year he decided he was going to go back to school full time and work full time too. I warned him not to go back to school full time since he had pay for it himself and it would be better if he started of slowly. well anyways I don't think he passed any of the classes he didn't drop already. Which means he threw away $2000+.

So then I came up with the bright idea that we save money to move out together. Then he started acting weird about the money that was put away. Come to find out he used the money to buy me a birthday gift. Of course I made him pay me back. But then that turned me off from wanting to move in with him.

He is very irresponsible with paying his bills and managing his money. He doesn't take any of my suggestions to help manage things better. I get so irritated that he is throwing away money on overdraft and late fees. That is money that could be spent on me! (joke) But really we coulda at least been moved in together.

He is a great person. But he sucks as a boyfriend. He says he wants to change. he doesn't want to be irresponsible anymore. blah blah blah. I'm just sick of hearing it but not seeing it. He has great potential to be an awesome boyfriend/husband/father. How do I help this process along??

Does anyone know what you call the female counterpart to "Captain Save-A-Ho?"