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Old 11-04-2008, 03:17 PM
 
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They say that men have 10 non verbal cues they give off to show women they are interested, while women have a selection of almost 50 non verbal cues, which obviously makes it confusing for the man.

Actually I believe women make the first move all the time, it's just that they are more subtle about it. I would describe it as women open or perhaps unlock the door and they leave it to the man to walk through or open it up. Ultimately I think it's the woman that picks the man, only she tricks the man into thinking he's the one who made it happen. What it comes down to is women have it, we want it, they know it.

When I was in my mid 20's working in a ski resort in a nice customer service job, I had my first experiences with older women. At that time I wasn't into the cougar thing so I always rebuffed the offers(I was a fool!). What I was shocked about was how direct they were. There were several times where they said flatly here's the deal, you can have me all night anyway you want. I was so used to having to work for it and play games and make all the moves frankly I was taken aback by the direct offers. Now I realize partly it's due to as you get older, you really don't want to goof around with games and nonsense and really you just want to get down to business.
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Old 11-04-2008, 08:17 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,843 posts, read 54,857,697 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by optiflex View Post
since its impossible to fake a genuine smile
I beg to differ. I believe I can fake a very genuine smile!
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Old 11-04-2008, 09:04 PM
 
Location: San Diego, CA
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A lot of us guys are hesitant about making first moves because women can be difficult to read.. Add that to the fact that most of us are easily confused and you can see where shyness comes in

To me, a woman who makes the first move tells me she is strong and confident - two qualities I certainly look for in any woman.
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Old 11-05-2008, 12:49 AM
Status: "raining nicely" (set 17 hours ago)
 
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I think it's nice when the guy makes the first move. This way you know he likes you and there's no mystery. It is probably old-fashioned thinking but I don't care. Something old-fashioned should still be in existence.

I think younger women are more comfortable making the first move, yeah. I did it once a long time ago but I waited until I could not take it anymore; the guy wasn't doing anything and I had to find out what was going to happen between us. It didn't work out. I scared him with my boldness!
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Old 11-05-2008, 01:56 AM
 
1,020 posts, read 675,146 times
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What hasn't been discussed here is the consequences of women taking the first move.

My own experience is that when women take the first move the relationship tends to get physical much faster. You know she is interested and now you just need to figure out what her boundaries regarding how quickly she will do stuff with you.

In terms of ideals, I would like to believe that if a woman asked me out that it could turn into some sort of long term relationship, but that hasn't been my experience. The times it has happened it has always turned into friends with benefits/booty call situation. Perhaps, I am just revealing my own character defects to the world and my experiences aren't representitive but I still think its a valid issue to raise.

When I have taken the intiative, that hasn't been the case. In the situations where I have pursued women, it seems to take longer to make forward progress physically with the women, but I also end up getting to know them better before things are getting physical. Some of these women still turn into booty calls as well, but a lot greater percentage seem to turn into longer term relationships.
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Old 11-05-2008, 07:44 AM
 
Location: New Jersey
1,177 posts, read 2,038,468 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by edwardius View Post
What hasn't been discussed here is the consequences of women taking the first move.

My own experience is that when women take the first move the relationship tends to get physical much faster. You know she is interested and now you just need to figure out what her boundaries regarding how quickly she will do stuff with you.

In terms of ideals, I would like to believe that if a woman asked me out that it could turn into some sort of long term relationship, but that hasn't been my experience. The times it has happened it has always turned into friends with benefits/booty call situation. Perhaps, I am just revealing my own character defects to the world and my experiences aren't representitive but I still think its a valid issue to raise.

When I have taken the intiative, that hasn't been the case. In the situations where I have pursued women, it seems to take longer to make forward progress physically with the women, but I also end up getting to know them better before things are getting physical. Some of these women still turn into booty calls as well, but a lot greater percentage seem to turn into longer term relationships.
Good point. Another reason why I never did was because I didn't want to appear 'easy'.
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