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Unread 11-16-2008, 08:15 PM
 
Location: Burlington Washington
100 posts, read 168,208 times
Reputation: 40
Default Do I stay or do I go.................

I am orginally from Colorado. In 2001 I moved to Houston with 2 of my 3 kids.with my husband. I also have 2 step kids in Maine. After living in houston for 4 yrs we moved to Seattle area because we hated the heat and my elderly folks lived here in washington. My mother-in-law from Maine visited us while in Houston and decided to move there. Nobody believed she would do it. Well, after we move up here to washington she bought a house and moved to Texas. Her daughter and 2 grandkids know live with her and her husband. We have 2 kids up here in washington (21 daughter with child and expecting twins and 20 yr old son) I know my children all would move back to texas if we moved back there. Well, my husband just got laid off and he is going to try and run his own plumbing business. They gave him all their leads, but I know they will run out. Okay so my question!!!!! His old job in Texas said the door is always open and offered him a good salary. But what about my parents and the heat??!! We can not afford to buy a house here in washington but could in Texas. What should we do?? I am the only family here for my 70 yr old parents and they do not like Texas. I like being by the water but I do get tired of the rain. What to do?????????????????????????????
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Unread 11-16-2008, 08:24 PM
 
Location: Hot Springs, AR
5,612 posts, read 8,791,793 times
Reputation: 3586
If 1) the majority of the family is in Texas, 2) the children are wiling to move there, 3) you will be able to afford a home in Texas and 4) your husband will have a very good job, I say what are you waiting for? It sounds to me like your quality of life will significantly improve by returning to Texas. About the heat, there's an invention called "air conditioning". Also, it isn't hot all year around. As for your parents, if they don't like Texas, maybe they can just move closer. A lot retirees live in Arizona or Arkansas.

Bottom Line: you've got four positives and two negatives, one of which is easy to overcome.
It sounds to me like your quality of life would not be as good staying in Washington.
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Unread 11-16-2008, 10:32 PM
 
Location: Arkansas
2,384 posts, read 3,786,986 times
Reputation: 1065
Go back to Houston [heat is not that bad I lived there] and stick it out for the next several years and once your hubby has established himself again and has been working for a few years, try to transfer back to Washington. By living in Houston, you can buy a home, build some equity again and hopefully sell 5 years down the road and make some money.
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Unread 11-17-2008, 10:28 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,079 posts, read 7,852,540 times
Reputation: 3589
I can understand your concern over the elders in your family but face it, you have to take care of you and yours. They have the most amazing thing called air conditioning! I say move back to Texas and it will all work out. If you live in Houston, everyone wins and those who don't will adjust.
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Unread 11-17-2008, 10:34 AM
 
Location: West Texas
2,440 posts, read 3,338,350 times
Reputation: 2990
I just have one question to turn the issue back upon you, Jenniferwa: If you were the parent, and your child, her husband, and their kids had an opportunity to increase the standard of living but the only think keeping them from doing so was worry about you being alone, what would you say? I would bet that you would tell them to go and not worry about you (you want a better life for them). I think your folks might say the same thing if asked (not saying you should ask.. but ask yourself the question rhetorically).

Heat is easy... get a house with air conditioning... it's probably hotter here in West Texas than there.. but just less humid.

One last recommendation: check into places for your folks. I don't know if they need special attention. But if you move back, look for retirement communities, or something similar. If you decide to take care of your family and move back to Texas, talk with your parents and show them all the research you've done to try to include them and let them know you're still keeping them with the family "core." If they decide to go, your homework is already done. If not, they can at least know they are that far into your thoughts.

Good luck on your choice!

Last edited by Rathagos; 11-17-2008 at 10:55 AM.. Reason: Beause I'm a moron and didn't get the name of the OP right!
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Unread 11-17-2008, 10:38 AM
 
Location: Land of 10000 Lakes +
5,555 posts, read 3,800,528 times
Reputation: 8508
I think Andrea agrees with you Rath from her post. I say you have to go where the money is for now - survival you know - and then you can rethink in the future.
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Unread 11-17-2008, 10:48 AM
 
Location: Burlington Washington
100 posts, read 168,208 times
Reputation: 40
I am new to this site but I am glad I found it. It is neat to hear what other people think and know I am not alone . I just wish life would get easier with age not harder. Maybe I am making it harder, I do not know. I just want everyone happy and it is hard. Thanks a bunch to everyone that took a moment to care. Still pondering.
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Unread 11-17-2008, 10:49 AM
 
13,779 posts, read 15,502,096 times
Reputation: 7213
Quote:
Originally Posted by jenniferwa View Post
I am new to this site but I am glad I found it. It is neat to hear what other people think and know I am not alone . I just wish life would get easier with age not harder. Maybe I am making it harder, I do not know. I just want everyone happy and it is hard. Thanks a bunch to everyone that took a moment to care. Still pondering.
Welcome!
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Unread 11-17-2008, 10:55 AM
 
Location: West Texas
2,440 posts, read 3,338,350 times
Reputation: 2990
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aylalou View Post
I think Andrea agrees with you Rath from her post. I say you have to go where the money is for now - survival you know - and then you can rethink in the future.
Yes, Aylalou. I was a moron and put her name in the post instead of the OPs!!!! I can't believe I did that!! I fixed it now, though. Hope it was before Andreaspersheron saw it and thought WTH!?!? lol
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Unread 11-17-2008, 11:08 AM
 
Location: Florida
7,250 posts, read 6,042,655 times
Reputation: 5885
The positives outweigh. Like Andrea said above, you have to take care of you and yours first. Air conditioning, cooler clothes - worked for me in Phoenix, Arizona, in here FL - and for many others young and old alike. Good luck.
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