Future Spouse Post-Grad Celebration (boyfriends, girl, husband, family)

[Anneee]

I don't think it's ever a good idea to provide a gift registry on an invitation. Have it available in case someone should ask, but don't expect people to bring gifts... especially in this economy.

[sms0511]

Originally Posted by Anneee

I don't think it's ever a good idea to provide a gift registry on an invitation. Have it available in case someone should ask, but don't expect people to bring gifts... especially in this economy.

Thx!

[fjtee]

As others have said, do not include any reference to a gift registry. That is considered very rude and presumptuous. Just assume everyone in this circle has been raised properly.

[sms0511]

Originally Posted by fjtee

As others have said, do not include any reference to a gift registry. That is considered very rude and presumptuous. Just assume everyone in this circle has been raised properly.

I agree with you, but this is only with the assumption that everyone on the guest list is aware of the etiquette of bringing a gift and/or a bottle of wine to a dinner reception for a big milestone of his.

Unfortunately, I know as a matter of fact that several of the people on the "guest list" do not have that etiquette/ that proper train of thought (I have heard some of them complain about having to get a gift to someone's wedding!! ). That's why I was thinking of dropping a hint of bearing a gift for the honored man at the post-grad reception -- though there's is nothing more obvious than naming the place for the gift registry on the invitation, I admit

[fjtee]

Originally Posted by sms0511

I agree with you, but this is only with the assumption that everyone on the guest list is aware of the etiquette of bringing a gift and/or a bottle of wine to a dinner reception for a big milestone of his.

Unfortunately, I know as a matter of fact that several of the people on the "guest list" do not have that etiquette/ that proper train of thought (I have heard some of them complain about having to get a gift to someone's wedding!! ). That's why I was thinking of dropping a hint of bearing a gift for the honored man at the post-grad reception -- though there's is nothing more obvious than naming the place for the gift registry on the invitation, I admit

Nope. You've got to be the bigger person and just make this assumption, anyway. Honestly, so what if they don't bring a gift? Is that really going to ruin the rest of your lives? Do you really think he'll be missing out on an item that will somehow inspire him to save the world? Invite those people and just be happy they want to celebrate this milestone of his.

[sms0511]

Originally Posted by fjtee

Nope. You've got to be the bigger person and just make this assumption, anyway. Honestly, so what if they don't bring a gift? Is that really going to ruin the rest of your lives? Do you really think he'll be missing out on an item that will somehow inspire him to save the world? Invite those people and just be happy they want to celebrate this milestone of his.

Will it ruin the rest of his life or mine? Nope, but if any of them cannot even come up with a $10.00 gift, I would have a mental tag for him/ her that says "FREELOADER".

I do go by the old etiquette of reciprocation -- if I get invited AND my dinner/ meal is paid for, then I should reciprocate by giving them a gift (no matter how small it is) as a way of gratitude. To me, it is a simple case of good manners.

Unfortunately, good manners have gone by the wayside lately, especially with some people in his closest circle. You even say the phrase "free food", and I can smokes coming out of their tails from them chasing you .

I mean, seriously, has any been invited to a nice reception and NOT get a gift for the honored person of the event, and then later on after the event is completed, become EMBARRASSED for not getting the honored person anything? I would be... but hey, I guess one person's etiquette is not always another's.

[fjtee]

Hello again. I understand it would be tacky to not bring a gift. But, to include a reference to gifts in any invitation is likewise tacky. It shows that your manners are lacking and that you do not know proper etiquette. Seriously. You can ask Miss Manners or Dear Abby and they will confirm this. You would just be stooping to their "bad manners" level by committing an etiquette gaffe yourself. Besides, if you do this, you are only going to offend those who do know better and those who haven't a clue still won't bring a gift.

[sms0511]

Originally Posted by fjtee

Hello again. I understand it would be tacky to not bring a gift. But, to include a reference to gifts in any invitation is likewise tacky. It shows that your manners are lacking and that you do not know proper etiquette. Seriously. You can ask Miss Manners or Dear Abby and they will confirm this. You would just be stooping to their "bad manners" level by committing an etiquette gaffe yourself. Besides, if you do this, you are only going to offend those who do know better and those who haven't a clue still won't bring a gift.

Yeah, I guess the drive for the registry stems from my irritation of their tackiness to just show up "presentless", and I wasn't even thinking of extravagant gift either. But in regards to that, I heard from someone that if the reception is at a nice restaurants, the trend is that people are more apt to bear gifts, versus if I were to have the reception at ... let's say... TGIF or Chili's... what do you think?

[mrstewart]

Including a gift registry, place of registration or even a suggestion of a gift is considered in poor taste...Do you have an Emily Post handy? The protocol will be addressed in there.

[vukinjo]

Maybe its just me, but I wouldn't even think of someone who didn't bring a gift as being tacky. It seems to me you are pretty caught up in whether or not your SO is going to get presents.