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Old 12-16-2008, 06:09 AM
 
1,570 posts, read 2,063,535 times
Reputation: 461

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Quote:
Originally Posted by pitt_transplant View Post
Do any of you realize that a full grown man can kill another human with ONE punch made correctly?

That is what 911 is for..To save people from that. I mean seriously...I don't know if anyone remembers that "Real world" a couple years back where the construction worker caught one good one in a street fight and it crushed the side of his skull, made him have perm vision problems and distorted his face. The doctor said he was LUCKY that he didn't die.

There is a reason cops have training, guns, sticks and mace. PEOPLE ARE NUTS AND YOU DON'T KNOW HOW NUTS THEY CAN GET!

You don't need to get directly involved because :
- its a danger to yourself
- will not solve the larger problem it only saves the moment (for which abused pay for later)

When the cops get involved at least sometimes they force them into seeking help.
Most males don't know how to punch correctly and then they don't know where to hit so that punch can be deadly. I agree with people being nuts but most of the time an abuser of the weak is just a coward. So something has to be done call the cops or shoot the abuser dead.
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Old 12-16-2008, 06:37 AM
 
8,411 posts, read 39,215,832 times
Reputation: 6366
Quote:
Originally Posted by 60-minutes-II View Post
Most males don't know how to punch correctly and then they don't know where to hit so that punch can be deadly. I agree with people being nuts but most of the time an abuser of the weak is just a coward. So something has to be done call the cops or shoot the abuser dead.
You should NEVER fire a weapon in a public place. You have to have proper bullets to not penetrate or travel and even then if it were to slice through soft tissue and go into an home's window nearby and kill the person just watching TV that night.

You don't need to know how to punch correctly to do damage. You can still kill with a sloppy punch. You will just break your hand most likely.

And heres another slice of fat to chew...
A guy that was friends with a relative back when they were young did 10 years hard time for punching a guy and killing him in a bar fight. He didn't start the fight and was just defending himself/people he was with. You want to go away for 10 years and get it up the but just to play hero?

Again 911
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Old 12-16-2008, 06:48 AM
 
1,570 posts, read 2,063,535 times
Reputation: 461
Quote:
Originally Posted by pitt_transplant View Post
You should NEVER fire a weapon in a public place. You have to have proper bullets to not penetrate or travel and even then if it were to slice through soft tissue and go into an home's window nearby and kill the person just watching TV that night.

You don't need to know how to punch correctly to do damage. You can still kill with a sloppy punch. You will just break your hand most likely.

And heres another slice of fat to chew...
A guy that was friends with a relative back when they were young did 10 years hard time for punching a guy and killing him in a bar fight. He didn't start the fight and was just defending himself/people he was with. You want to go away for 10 years and get it up the but just to play hero?

Again 911
I did mention calling 911.
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Old 12-16-2008, 07:21 AM
 
47,525 posts, read 69,570,473 times
Reputation: 22474
Quote:
Originally Posted by 60-minutes-II View Post
really? That is so wrong, you are just making excuses for BAD behavior. And these abusers would never pick on someone who could defend themselves. They'd have no problem beating up on a 60 yr old or 80 yr old or a pregnent women. Its not because they love you so much, its because they like to see the suffering they are inflicting. Its what gives them joy.
You're wrong. Many abusers look and act like the nicest people to the outside. They don't go around punching 80 year old women they never met, they don't just attack everyone they see. They often pick on only one person. To co-workers, family, and neighbors they might seem to be great guys. That's why they aren't arrested unless the victim gets that done.

It's a relationship dynamic. These men select their victim, certain traits are required.
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Old 12-16-2008, 07:24 AM
 
47,525 posts, read 69,570,473 times
Reputation: 22474
Quote:
Originally Posted by MommyV View Post
Well, if this were an isolated incident, then yes, logically that's what anyone would do. But I bet this happens all the time to her and it gets worse at home. Her choices don't seem that clear to her. It's very difficult to explain to someone who's never been there and it's even very hard to come to accept that it happened to you.

I really can't keep going on this thread. It's becoming too painful
Which is why it's still going to happen after some knight in shining armor in the mall goes running in to punch out her shouting boyfriend. She will go home with that boyfriend and the abuse will most likely be all the worse for the other man injecting himself for a few moments at the mall.

The woman needs out of the relationship. She doesn't want to leave the relationship for her own reasons -- not at that point. Often the police have to lock him in jail and get her to a woman's shelter and with counseling *maybe* she can be made to see the way out.
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Old 12-16-2008, 08:10 AM
 
28,896 posts, read 54,049,794 times
Reputation: 46669
Well, I haven't read all umpteen pages of this thread. But I will say this:

1) If you intervene in a domestic dispute of any kind, it's almost certain that the woman will take the side of the husband. So it becomes a no-win situation.

2) That being said, if there's outright violence, then you should be duty-bound to step in. It becomes your business when you are forced to witness it.

3) The first time a man abuses his SO, it's his fault. The next time it happens, it's her fault. This is in no way blaming the victim. But there should be zero tolerance in this situation. Simply leave and don't come back.

4) I also think parents have a duty to teach their daughters the following points:

-- No man can ever dictate to you how to think.
-- No man ever will control how you live your life.
-- No man will ever lay a hand on you in anger.
-- No man will ever try to isolate you from your friends, your relatives, or your colleagues.
-- No man should ever make you feel inferior or devalued.
-- You do not require a man in your life to be happy.

If parents would simply teach their daughters these simple lessons, it would make their lives so much easier. I've told my 13-year-old daughter these things so often she can recite them by heart.
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Old 12-16-2008, 08:15 AM
 
Location: syracuse ny
2,412 posts, read 5,077,491 times
Reputation: 2048
Quote:
Originally Posted by What! View Post
After the scene was over we got into a discussion, which quickly degenerated into a gender war argument. Basically, the women said he had no right to treat her like that and one of us should have stepped in. Me and the rest of the dudes didn't agree with that chick logic. I took the forefront and pointed out the following:
?
I'm more worried about you! Are any of these women your g-friend? She is so concerned for the girl and you're a jerk for not doing something about it? That's classic female manipulation. She's so concerned..get her butt up there and confront him! Ohh no, I'm just a wilting flower who only shoots venom at MY MAN! lol
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Old 12-16-2008, 08:30 AM
 
Location: NH and lovin' it!
1,780 posts, read 3,923,944 times
Reputation: 1332
Quote:
Originally Posted by World Citizen View Post
Sorry. I'm glad to find out that you were being sarcastic!
Unfortunately, there are some who believe what you said in that post.

This is a subject that I may be too close to be objective...
Like another poster said ... it makes me mad.
WC and all: I guess I do get kind of excited about the subject sometimes. But IMHO I think it is my duty to educate people who don't understand abuse, abusers and their targets.
It took me years to figure out what was happening in my own relationship... no one helped me see what was happening. So now whenI can I try to help other women understand. I try to explain to men why this happens to women. I don't have any knowlege about the converse situation, so I can't say much... women abusing men... but I know it happens.
WorldCitizen, I am sorry that abuse has happened to you, and celebrate with you the fact that you "got out." Regards.
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Old 12-16-2008, 08:36 AM
 
Location: NH and lovin' it!
1,780 posts, read 3,923,944 times
Reputation: 1332
Quote:
Originally Posted by bibit612 View Post
They know what they are doing. They are justifying it by saying that the person being abused asked for it, provoked them and therefore deserved it. They deflect the act on the person being abused. What they do is to NOT acknowledge that it IS abuse.
I agree with that assessment. In my stbx's mind, I deserved the treatment I got. It was always my fault that the situation happened. It was my fault when he didn't want to do things with me. It was my fault he refused "anything" to me. He "never" did anything wrong!!
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Old 12-16-2008, 08:40 AM
 
5,715 posts, read 15,028,267 times
Reputation: 2949
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoanD'Arc View Post
I agree with that assessment. In my stbx's mind, I deserved the treatment I got. It was always my fault that the situation happened. It was my fault when he didn't want to do things with me. It was my fault he refused "anything" to me. He "never" did anything wrong!!
You're right. That's what they tell you... it's YOUR fault. You deserve it.

I kind of got into this in another post, too.

It's all about controlling through fear and intimidation.
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