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What if this were on the other foot...what if the woman being abused was your mother? Your sister? Your cousin? Your aunt? Would you be happy knowing that plenty of people saw her being abused but decided they would let someone else deal with it, or were too afraid, or thought they "liked" it, or that it was a lost cause...
Hmmmm...I doubt anyone would be blabbering on here about passing on the responsibility...
I could care less if a man's screaming at a woman. Thats not my business. But something about a man striking a woman makes me see red. And I wouldn't think twice about picking up a 2x4, a bottle, a baseball bat, cement block, hell I'd pick up a newspaper machine and hit that fool from behind!
What makes me wonder about many of you who want to intervene is that you yourselves want to smack the guy around. You want to physically assault him whether it does anything to remove the woman from the relationship or not. In fact you all admit she's most likely going to stay with him but you get an opportunity to punch someone around.
It would be better to offer to pay for years of counseling. Both for the abuser and the victim. You don't instantenously end an abusive relationship of someone you never met before. Not with all your fists, not even with a baseball bat. Clubbing someone over the head isn't going to make him into a nice person.
What makes me wonder about many of you who want to intervene is that you yourselves want to smack the guy around. You want to physically assault him whether it does anything to remove the woman from the relationship or not. In fact you all admit she's most likely going to stay with him but you get an opportunity to punch someone around.
So, now the people who want to help are the abusers??????
It seems to me that the bystanders who do not help someone in need are just as much part of the problem as the abuser...
Location: Wandering the halls aimlessly...Hello? Is anyone there?
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I disagree
Quote:
Originally Posted by MommyV
One person doing something to help an abused woman like in the OP's situation isn't going to help the woman, but if it were happening to her all the time and people were constantly intervening by calling the police or security, it would help her see that these things are not normal and eventually might lead her to start seeing straight again, but unfortunately, women don't snap out of it that easily.
Inaction is the worst form of action one can take, especially in situations such as these. You may be the only person gutsy enough to get involved, to be thier saving grace. Its called human decency and as I'm finding out, many just dont give a crap about anyone but themselves nowadays. So you sit back, let this woman get beat senseless, doing this while with your family or children. Nice example to set...really. The original poster said that he was with several freinds when he witnessed this altercation. Wouldnt it stand to reason that several guys could have sudued the aggressor?
I worked in a facility that housed close to 4000 inmates who committed all sorts of crimes. Your argument about them laying the reasons for thier actions on others is false. The majority of the wife beaters I dealt with accepted that what they did was wrong, but looked at thier spouse as piece of property rather than a living, breathing human being. Its my property and as such I can do whatever I want. No guilt, no shame, no conscience. Many of them would kill the family pet as a way of reinforcing thier dominance over thier spouses or girlfreinds.
We are truly living in sad times...really. I would rather die knowing I was trying to help someone than walk away and allow someone to die at the hands of an abuser. Thats just me...its called a conscience and its called decency.
I try to create a little good where there is none. Thats just me. I cant save the world, but I can add a little positive where negative resides.
May you never be on the recieving end of a severe beating as people walk by...
What if this were on the other foot...what if the woman being abused was your mother? Your sister? Your cousin? Your aunt? Would you be happy knowing that plenty of people saw her being abused but decided they would let someone else deal with it, or were too afraid, or thought they "liked" it, or that it was a lost cause...
Hmmmm...I doubt anyone would be blabbering on here about passing on the responsibility...
If it were a relative of mine I'd want to know why she's letting herself be hit, rather than jumping to conclusions. Me, personally, I've got some crazy women in my family so I need to know why things are happening before I dive in.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rance
I could care less if a man's screaming at a woman. Thats not my business. But something about a man striking a woman makes me see red. And I wouldn't think twice about picking up a 2x4, a bottle, a baseball bat, cement block, hell I'd pick up a newspaper machine and hit that fool from behind!
You keep missing what malamute and many others are saying in this thread. How is this going to stop the abuse altogether, Superman? Do you really think being "heroic" will stop her from going back to her man later on?
If it were a relative of mine I'd want to know why she's letting herself be hit, rather than jumping to conclusions. Me, personally, I've got some crazy women in my family so I need to know why things are happening before I dive in.
You need to stop assuming people WANT to be abused...
So, now the people who want to help are the abusers??????
It seems to me that the bystanders who do not help someone in need are just as much part of the problem as the abuser...
I think they could be.
A 5 to 10 minute fist fight with someone in the mall you never met who is yelling at his girlfriend certainly isn't going to end an abusive relationship. No one believes that doing so is going to have the woman walk out on the relationship and seek counseling unless she was already ready to do that.
I wonder how many men eager to jump in and beat up a man who is yelling at his lover would do so if the yelling guy is a foot taller and a hundred pounds heavier?
Are most heros more inclined to fist fight a smaller man yelling at a woman or a much bigger man yelling at a woman?
Resorting to phyical assault -- whether one feels heroic or not is actually just more of the same only in the case where you physically assault someone who is just yelling -- no matter how bad yelling is -- is just more of the same attitude that physical aggression solves behavior problems in others.
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I disagree
