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I am very active also, I run between 4-7 times a week and I could never date someone who is overweight. If someone is overweight, it usually means that they have low self esteem, they don't care about themselves too much and they tend to be lazy, not to mention that most overweight people have very little ambition, energy and stamina, I mean, how many wealthy, successful and famous people are overweight?. As a man, I do not feel attracted at all to someone who is overweight, PERIOD!
Hmmm....I know a number of obese millionaires. Being fat doesn't mean you can't make good business decisions.
Okay, so who is the loser who brought this thread back to life?
So the OP pefers dating women who are not fat. Good for him. I see no reason to really discuss things any further. He likes what he likes.
Perhaps the real discussion isn't what the OP prefers to date. The question I inferred from the initial post was one of WHY there seems to be such disparity between what people say and do with regard to body image and personal health.
Heaven forbid others post on the topic or discuss opinions and thoughts.
For someone espousing such an interest in Eastern Philosophy (per your profile) and the martial way (which is SO much more than just whoopin' keister), your statement suggests a lack of patience with that which you do not find interesting despite that others might merely be voicing and exploring their own positions on the matter.
I admire people who know what they want in another person. There are certain deal breakers and if you don't want a 'fat woman,' 'smoker,' 'druggie,' 'tall woman,' 'short man,' or whatever, that is your choice.
However, do not make cracks or assumptions about people based on their body type. Not every overweight person is racked with 'secret demons' or 'has self esteem issues.'
This overweight woman exercises 5 times a week. I hike and I walk and I am always moving whether it's walking my dog, working out on the treadmill, or cleaning the house.
Not everyone 'overweight' sits around sucking down cartons of ice cream, eats a whole cake at one sitting, or fails to exercise. It's much more complicated than that.
If you see someone overweight, do you think 'hahaha' let's laugh at them? I just don't get it...
I think a lot of 'fat phobics' secretly HATE themselves and figure let's laugh at the fatty (which could mean a few pounds to a few hundred) before someone sees 'my flaws.' Kind of like being a bully...
What's wrong with a happy medium? Not fat OR thin? Is there no middle ground?
Honestly, I'd be afraid of breaking someone skinny.
If YOU want a happy medium, that's fine. But that doesn't mean you should put down others.
You say here, "I'd be afraid of breaking someone skinny" and that's ok.
If someone said, "I'd be afraid of being crushed by someone fat" you'd think that person is a jerk. Don't you get that?
You can't have it both ways - either you think it is ok to insult and ridicule women about their bodies are you think it is wrong. All women have feelings, who are YOU to decide which ones should be insulted?
If YOU want a happy medium, that's fine. But that doesn't mean you should put down others.
You say here, "I'd be afraid of breaking someone skinny" and that's ok.
If someone said, "I'd be afraid of being crushed by someone fat" you'd think that person is a jerk. Don't you get that?
You can't have it both ways - either you think it is ok to insult and ridicule women about their bodies are you think it is wrong. All women have feelings, who are YOU to decide which ones should be insulted?
I wouldn't think they were a "jerk"--I wouldn't think twice about it. But if they were to make a patently false claim, I'd have to call them on it. If they said, "All fat people are stupid." or "Blondes just aren't active." or "Asian women eat too much food." then I might say something about making an erroneous assumption.
My initial post about this was asking if he was certain that "fat" women couldn't also be active and healthy, basically. It's not a valid claim to say that NO fat woman is active--and that was my only quarrel. If he said he was afraid of being crushed, I probably wouldn't have said anything at all about it.
I go to my local Lifetime Fitness and I see very few guys who are overweight, have a beer belly and are very successful in life, or attract a lot of good looking women. Most guys like me who feel really good about themselves usually are very fit, work out there almost every day and usually are ripped.
As for me, years ago when I was single, I'd pretty much only want to date "pleasing plump" ladies. I was fairly fit due to the exercise I got in the rodeo arena and owning a horse. So, why did I go for "pleasing plump" ladies? To me (remember, I did say "to me") they were more "down-to-earth", cute and, for lack of better wording, I could afford them! I dated a couple of
slim/very nice looking (not Model types though) ladies, but noticed that other guys would sometimes "gawk" at them......didn't need/want that. And, in going to a few Country nightclubs, I could see the kind of men these slim/very good looking ladies generally dated.....basically "muscle and money" type guys, of which I was not!
Now, when talking about weight, there is a difference between 20 lbs overweight and just plain obese! My wife is 20 lbs overweight now and she still looks great to me (as I'm about the same). But, in our early 60's and less active, weight is an issue just like some others in that age bracket.
Weight has always been an issue in society, but much more today than years past! When wife/I see singers and actor/actresses our age, we absolutely know that "we are not alone" with excess weight! Our Generation, the Woodstock era, we see what those people that were there look like now and we just smile to each other and say "that's the way it is".
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