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thanks, any advice is appreciated. I am a bit of a social phobic and i dont really like beeing around people much- so sometimes i get stuck when i talk to people.
I wouldn't call those casual questions. You might want to keep things light. For example if I were curious about a man, I'd say, "So what do you have, girlfriend, wife, sheep....?" It's an icebreaker.
Change the subject to school and work. Obviously, they are what is high on her priority list at this time. Just ask "How's school going?" and move on with the conversation.
You didn't say if this was a date conversation or a general conversation, so I'll agree with Ivoryticklet and pitt-transplant. She steered the conversation where she wanted it to go.
Though if it was a date, the answer would be a red-flag for me.
Ok guys, i have been talking to someone and i asked her this:
Me: so, if you dont mind me asking- how is your love life going? when was your last relationship?
Her reply: A few months ago. I don't have time for a love life with school and work.
thats a very vague, non-descript answer from her dont you think? we could have gone into a whole topic about love and relationships.
i always seem to shut down when someone says how busy they are when they talk about work or school- i never know what to say next, sometimes it makes me feel disinterested. What is the best way to answer or how should i reply? I just want to know for future reference.
I think you need to offer a bit more information. Is this someone you know personally? A friend? Or is this someone you are communicating with online? On a dating site?
It's difficult to tell what the context of her reply is, without knowing what the venue was.
Ok guys, i have been talking to someone and i asked her this:
Me: so, if you dont mind me asking- how is your love life going? when was your last relationship?
Her reply: A few months ago. I don't have time for a love life with school and work.
thats a very vague, non-descript answer from her dont you think? we could have gone into a whole topic about love and relationships.
i always seem to shut down when someone says how busy they are when they talk about work or school- i never know what to say next, sometimes it makes me feel disinterested. What is the best way to answer or how should i reply? I just want to know for future reference.
Hmmm ... somehow I get the feeling that what you were asking was none of your business and she didn't feel the need to share that info with you.
In that case, I'd say that was a bit off-kilter to ask her such a question. If this was an online conversation, with someone you were interested in, then it would be a logical inquiry. Obviously she is not comfortable discussing the topic with you, at least at this point, so don't dwell on it, and keep the conversations focused on less "relationship-minded" topics. You could have responded with "So, when you DO have free time, what's your favorite way to spend it?"
In that case, I'd say that was a bit off-kilter to ask her such a question. If this was an online conversation, with someone you were interested in, then it would be a logical inquiry. Obviously she is not comfortable discussing the topic with you, at least at this point, so don't dwell on it, and keep the conversations focused on less "relationship-minded" topics. You could have responded with "So, when you DO have free time, what's your favorite way to spend it?"
i already asked her that and she was like oh i like ''clubbing, going to bars''...i was thinking hmmm this is awkward, maybe i should go.
i already asked her that and she was like oh i like ''clubbing, going to bars''...i was thinking hmmm this is awkward, maybe i should go.
Well, you did say she was just someone you met in a bar. If that's as much as she wants to share with you, then yes...I'd probably move on. And if that is REALLY all she likes to do, then you might not find much depth there anyway.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Andrew83
i always seem to shut down when someone says how busy they are when they talk about work or school- i never know what to say next, sometimes it makes me feel disinterested. What is the best way to answer or how should i reply? I just want to know for future reference.
I always seem to shut down when someone asks me about my love life--which, honestly, doesn't happen often. LOL It doesn't matter if my love life is going great or nonexistent, I just don't like sharing it with anyone but a chosen few and they know who they are b'c I go to them with it, they don't come to me.
ETA: What can you say to that? Just start talking about something else.
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