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No i'm not singing to ya. I'm just bout at my wits end. I'm trying so hard to make this work. We have a child between us and I have children from a previous. I'm just thinking that if I live to be a really old lady can I survive another 50 to 60 years of this. It makes me think i don't want to live to be an old lady if I have to deal with this and I plan on living to be a 105 so for the love of pete what should I do? He is one of those men that has no sense of humor..in 7 years i've probably heard him laugh maybe 10 times..he beeches non stop and I'm not sure how much more I can take. I just sit there and try so hard to just ignore the fact that he's going off on me but dangit if it isn't hard. He's a good dad to our child but does nothing with mine. I know mine aren't babies anymore..one is grown and the other two are almost there 17 and 16 but you know would it hurt to maybe conversate with them outside of giving out the weekly chores? I left yesterday to go to walmart and a couple other places. I was gone 3 hours..he was fit to be tied. I haven't went anywhere without him in 2 or 3 months..After that I had to run my nieces home..he was mad about that nad gritched..So something just snapped in me and I just felt nothing..I didn't say anything to him. I just felt nothing. I have felt nothing towards him all day today. I don't know what to make of it. But I've just had enough. I'm trying so hard to stay til our youngest is grown but I'm just not so sure i'm gonna make it. Sorry so long. oh and Happy New Year to everyone. I hope everyone is having a good time.
Gosh, his anger bothers me, as does his attempt to control, but I don't want to come on too strongly one way or the other since I'm not there. For me, there was a moment in time when we were on a day trip to a nature preserve and he was screaming at me in the car about something bizarre and inconsequential and I said to myself "I'm 35 and for some reason I am sitting here allowing this - but I don't want to be sitting in this same seat when I am 40 or 50 or 60 (and I know he would be doing just the same thing)." But it's cumulative - it depends on the impacts - physical and psychological - on you and all involved; it depends on how open he is to discussion and how much you have tried so far.
Well I've given it 7 years of trying and i'm just about done trying. I can't go to my dad's without needing to rush right back home. He calls me several times while i'm there. Yes he is controlling. I got a job but had to quit. I got so tired of hearing did you talk to any guys..did any talk to you..did any hit on you. I'm 37 years old..not getting any younger. I wish I could go back i'd find the kind of guy that most refer to as a teddy bear. You know the sweet guy that you can sit around snuggle on the couch and watch movies with. Instead I have one that takes me out once a year on my birthday, gets mad if I even think of losing weight cause that would mean I want other men to look at me. I hate being fat I loved being skinny..i loved being able to tan when I wanted to. I loved being able to dress pretty. Now I can't do any of that exspecially if I'm going somewhere cause then it's all cause I want another man..well u know what..at this point I could care less if I had a man period much less him. sorry i'm just tired. So damn tired of it.
Well I've given it 7 years of trying and i'm just about done trying. I can't go to my dad's without needing to rush right back home. He calls me several times while i'm there. Yes he is controlling. I got a job but had to quit. I got so tired of hearing did you talk to any guys..did any talk to you..did any hit on you. I'm 37 years old..not getting any younger. I wish I could go back i'd find the kind of guy that most refer to as a teddy bear. You know the sweet guy that you can sit around snuggle on the couch and watch movies with. Instead I have one that takes me out once a year on my birthday, gets mad if I even think of losing weight cause that would mean I want other men to look at me. I hate being fat I loved being skinny..i loved being able to tan when I wanted to. I loved being able to dress pretty. Now I can't do any of that exspecially if I'm going somewhere cause then it's all cause I want another man..well u know what..at this point I could care less if I had a man period much less him. sorry i'm just tired. So damn tired of it.
It is prison. I left once before because I couldn't take it anymore. It had been a month since i'd been off my property so one day I just had enough and left. But I went back because I hate sharing our son. I don't like him staying a single night away from me. So what the hell do I do?
[quote=CountryLuvinWoman1;6782988) I wish I could go back i'd find the kind of guy that most refer to as a teddy bear. You know the sweet guy that you can sit around snuggle on the couch and watch movies with. Instead I have one that takes me out once a year on my birthday, gets mad if I even think of losing weight cause that would mean I want other men to look at me. I hate being fat I loved being skinny..i loved being able to tan when I wanted to. I loved being able to dress pretty. Now I can't do any of that exspecially if I'm going somewhere cause then it's all cause I want another man..well u know what..at this point I could care less if I had a man period much less him. sorry i'm just tired. So damn tired of it.[/quote]
Wow......sounds like you need desperately to find yourself again. A new year is approaching! (knudge, knudge...) Its not too late.
I would find your own place and ... well ... I don't think you're married so I don't know if a separation agreement would apply. But I'd try to get your son living with you and personally (not all would agree) but I'd try to be amicable and to provide some space to work things through - I'm not suggesting that you can reconcile, but I do think you can have an amicable working relationship.
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