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I'm curious as to how men feel about being asked to be the sole breadwinner of the family. I know I'd find that a scary thing to do. I'd feel a lot of pressure to keep my boss happy so I could keep my job. I'd also feel funny about my spouse having so much more time with the kids than me. I'd feel like I was the part time parent. Not that kids need either parent 24 x 7 but just by comparison. When one parent is there all the time and the other gone 50+ hours a week I thnk the kids would notice the difference.
So let's equalize things by having both parents gone 50+ hours a week? That way they won't notice one parent being less available than the other.
Also, fear or no fear, men over the generations embraced being the sole breadwinner as they realized that one of the characteristics of being a man (at least at that time) was being able to financially take care of their family.
So let's equalize things by having both parents gone 50+ hours a week? That way they won't notice one parent being less available than the other.
Also, fear or no fear, men over the generations embraced being the sole breadwinner as they realized that one of the characteristics of being a man (at least at that time) was being able to financially take care of their family.
Personally, I'd rather have two equal parents. I don't think either parent is needed 24 x 7. Good care is needed 24 x 7 but there are many people who can provide some of that care making it quite feasible for both parents to work. It would bother me if someone else were with my kids lots more than I was. I'd feel like that person was their parent and not me.
I wonder if men feel liberated now that it's not a requirement of being a man to support your family. I outearned my husband for many years and he got lots of comments about how lucky he was from friends. No one tells him he's lucky now that I'm making less than him.
Also, fear or no fear, men over the generations embraced being the sole breadwinner as they realized that one of the characteristics of being a man (at least at that time) was being able to financially take care of their family.
Today many seem to be more than happy not to be bothered with such pride. Yep, as we say back home - nobody can do to you what you do to yourself (referring to the unwanted by many gift of "rights" we were provided with)... Of course, just like any "movement" it wasn't really a grassroots movement (there are interesting articles online about Gloria Steinem), but it sure was embraced by enough to get us to the current lovely situation when men whine about buying a cup of coffee while "wooing" you...
Today many seem to be more than happy not to be bothered with such pride. Yep, as we say back home - nobody can do to you what you do to yourself (referring to the unwanted by many gift of "rights" we were provided with)... Of course, just like any "movement" it wasn't really a grassroots movement (there are interesting articles online about Gloria Steinem), but it sure was embraced by enough to get us to the current lovely situation when men whine about buying a cup of coffee while "wooing" you...
The question we need to ask is is is right to place gender specific expectaions on people? Why should being a man come with the requirement you earn a certain amount of money? Isn't that placing his value in what he can earn? Should we do that to people? Is the father who doesn't earn enough for his wife to stay at home really worth less? Should he be made to feel he's worth less?
The question we need to ask is is is right to place gender specific expectaions on people? Why should being a man come with the requirement you earn a certain amount of money? Isn't that placing his value in what he can earn? Should we do that to people?
You're on your own on this one. I don't subscribe to your currently expressed on the forum views. And I also find them particularly strange considering you debut on the forums (not this one) was a thread or two asking where and how to find wealthy men, if I'm not mistaken, and I don't think I am, but the archives don't go that far back. I was looking for it yesterday when I saw how judgmental you were on another thread. The "glass houses" comment referred to you.
[quote=Ivorytickler;6793880]The question we need to ask is is is right to place gender specific expectaions on people? Why should being a man come with the requirement you earn a certain amount of money? Isn't that placing his value in what he can earn? Should we do that to people? Is the father who doesn't earn enough for his wife to stay at home really worth less? Should he be made to feel he's worth less?[/quote]
Ivory, I have throughly enjoyed all your posts in this thread! I especially liked it when you said how times have changed so much- i.e. 'child-centered' etc. and many others.. I think you already know the answers to the questions you state here.
SHE sews, cooks, knits, gardens and raises chooks. The housewife is back – with younger women embracing traditional domestic crafts in droves, new figures show.
Sewing machines have rocketed off shelves in the past six months, with Lincraft reporting a 30 per cent increase in sales.
You're on your own on this one. I don't subscribe to your currently expressed on the forum views. And I also find them particularly strange considering you debut on the forums (not this one) was a thread or two asking where and how to find wealthy men, if I'm not mistaken, and I don't think I am, but the archives don't go that far back. I was looking for it yesterday when I saw how judgmental you were on another thread. The "glass houses" comment referred to you.
I can't believe Sierra didn't use the roll eyes icon!
SHE sews, cooks, knits, gardens and raises chooks. The housewife is back – with younger women embracing traditional domestic crafts in droves, new figures show.
Quote:
Originally Posted by John1960
Sewing machines have rocketed off shelves in the past six months, with Lincraft reporting a 30 per cent increase in sales.
I'd prefer to be on permanent vacation in Hawaii too. That anyone prefers anything is just a preference. We'd all prefer a lot of things but that doesn't mean we need them or they're even good for us. Not that staying home with the kids is bad for them but kids turn out the same regardless of whether or not mom works once you discount the impact of a higher standard of living for those who can provide it for their kids.
I really don't get the argument that mom preferring to stay home is a reason to stay home. If you want to and you can afford not to work, go for it but if you can't, you can't. We're not entitled to what we want in life just because we want it. Most of us have to work for what we get.
I would work even if my income didn't improve our standard of living but I'm proud of what I provide for my family. It's one of the ways I take care of them. I don't see a need to create a situation where living on one income is possible because I don't see living on one income as prefferable. I don't think my kids will turn out differently either way and, personally, I can't see leaving the work force because you lose too much when you take breaks in your career.
dang ivory, it won't let me give you any more reps!
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