Is this online dating stalking? (girlfriend, men, kiss, advice)

[12GO]

I admit I've been on a couple of those sites. I almost went to meet someone in Dec. But right before I was going, I suddenly stopped hearing from her. Why? I have no idea. I think I sent her a couple emails (1 was a funny email I forwarded to alot of friends and family) and did leave a message on her phone, I think twice. I've never heard from her, have no idea why the sudden no response, but I am not going to try to get hold of her in anyway. If she was to up and get hold me, (and I'd most likely be shocked after the month or so that's went by) she would have to be the one initially making contact. Plus I am now somewhat seeing somebody that has many of , well ok, just about all of the same interest I do. Thinking about making a question to this one and see if we will get more serious or not.

[ChessieMom]

Originally Posted by movin'on

I am new to this whole thing and registered on one site. There is this guy I spoke to a few times on the phone, arranged to meet, then I told him it wasn't the right time for me to meet someone so I cancelled. This is true (it isn't the right time), but I've left my profile up there for fun and just to see who comes along. Maybe in a month I will feel like I can meet someone. However, this guy would not be my type, even in a month and especially after the following.

Anyway, this guy sent me an email saying "I THOUGHT YOU WERE THROUGH WITH THIS!". I sent him one back saying that just because it's not the right time for me to meet someone doesn't mean I have to take my profile down. Since this time he has called me once, left no message, and sent me about five more emails, which I've deleted without reading, except for one which was just "?". Ugh. I just got another one from him and deleted it. Anyway, if he calls me again I think I am going to report him. But is this kind of behavior "normal" on a dating site? I mean, I never even met the guy. I've broken up with guys and never talked with them again! Thanks in advance.

I've never had this experience, but no, of course this isn't stalking. Yeesh. You should never have given the guy your number in the first place, if "it wasn't the right time". Even so, sure, you're gonna get the occasional determined idiot. Doesn't matter if that you are online - they are everywhere, not just online. Yanno - you CAN simply block his email. Why on earth wouldn't you do that and simply not worry any more about it??? Pretty simple solution.

[movin'on]

Originally Posted by ChessieMom

I've never had this experience, but no, of course this isn't stalking. Yeesh. You should never have given the guy your number in the first place, if "it wasn't the right time". Even so, sure, you're gonna get the occasional determined idiot. Doesn't matter if that you are online - they are everywhere, not just online. Yanno - you CAN simply block his email. Why on earth wouldn't you do that and simply not worry any more about it??? Pretty simple solution.

Because the one link to block someone also happens to be the same link to report someone. That's why. Plus, he's not my type and there will never be a right time for him.

[Crustedfilth]

I'm too old for this online dating thing. Never really got into it.
You can be anyone you want to be online. I'd rather just meet people face to face. Its part of my job so I'm pretty good at it.

[JustJulia]

Have you asked him to stop contacting you?

[wanneroo]

I know on Match there you can block people and they can't even see your profile. I think I have like 700 women blocked or something.

The guy sounds like a quack.

For starters you don't owe anyone an explanation for anything. You can date or talk to anyone you choose, you can respond to whatever emails you want, you can block whoever you want. You don't owe anyone anything.

I would send a simple message and say "Sorry, I am not interested. Best of Luck". If he contacts you again report em.

[amanda0808]

Have you tried taking your profile down from this site and trying a different one?

[Crustedfilth]

Originally Posted by wanneroo

I know on Match there you can block people and they can't even see your profile. I think I have like 700 women blocked or something.

The guy sounds like a quack.

For starters you don't owe anyone an explanation for anything. You can date or talk to anyone you choose, you can respond to whatever emails you want, you can block whoever you want. You don't owe anyone anything.

I would send a simple message and say "Sorry, I am not interested. Best of Luck". If he contacts you again report em.

700 women blocked eh? You must be a real swingin' dick.

[At1WithNature]

he's not a stalker (well maybe). but the odds are that you got him all worked up in your conversations. did you talk about bra size and things like that? he sounds like a guy who had his hopes up, probably fantasized about you, liked hearing your voice, etc. and when you cut it off he got upset. that's all. just flat out ignore him and the next time he contacts you give him a verbal or written warning that you'll contact the police if he doesn't stop.

[andreaspercheron]

Since you are new to online dating let me give you some pointers as I used to date online quite a bit in my single days and had some success and then other "interesting" stories.
First, you never, ever, ever give your number to someone unless you have talked online either through the site or personal email enough to get a really good sense of the persons personality.
Second, you don't agree to meet someone after only knowing them a short time. That's a big no-no. Keep this in mind, you are talking to someone online which gives that person the full advantage. Chances are, you are also not the first person that guy has talked to either and I'm sure he's got a game, as most do.
You have to really "feel" people out when you are talking online to them, chances are if you are getting a gut feeling that isn't all warm and fuzzy then you should be listening to that and going with that. It's called intuition and it's rarely wrong.

Also, it is good that you are putting yourself out there but even with that you have to really be careful about your wording in your profile online and what pictures you put up.
Unfortunately, the internet is a vast warehouse of a bunch of sickos and no not everyone is that way but a lot of men (and women) can be real jerks online. You don't want people knowing that you are "new to dating, or online dating", that is a weakness that people don't need to know. You also don't want to put things up (and these are just examples, and not directly related to your case) that you are "new to the area" or that you "have kids", which is all common sense stuff to some but not all people.
Anyway, my point being, you really have to be careful these days with online dating. Although keep in mind, it CAN be fun! You can have a lot of fun if nothing else just conversing with new people - you just have to be careful and watch what you're doing or saying.
And to answer your question - yes that guy is being a jerk. The best thing you can do is NOT respond to his emails or contact and continue with your online fun. Who cares what he thinks? He got hurt feelings, oh well. Many more will have hurt feelings before you are done, so don't fall for their crying and nasty emails. Ok?