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Just a day! He invited me over to his house to watch the game. Way too fast for me. I'd prefer to exchange several emails, followed by phone calls, followed by meeting for coffee in a public place. I am in no rush. I haven't gone out with anyone since March and don't want another repeat of what took place in the past year and a half. I'd like to be friends first - yunno, build something on a solid foundation.
Then this is exactly what you need to tell him. And change your profile picture. Even though statistically size 14 is average, most people consider that overweight. When one says "average" most people get the image of someone who is relatively in shape but doesn't work out.
Yeah, as long as I feel fat, it will always be an issue. But that is my own personal problem and probably why my weight has fluctuated so much over the years. Maybe that is why I don't see this as a misrepresentation issue, as I know me and that I'll be down there again. Our society is awfully focused on weight. Now there was this guy on there who posted a pic of himself with a full head of hair, yet put bald on his profile. That to me is misrepresentation, as that hair ain't coming back.
Oh well, I appreciate everyone's input. Thank you. The unemployment issue is probably what is going to screw things up, but they have no category on that site for unemployed..
How are you supporting yourself? As long as you have some kind of support, and and a plan, and not living on the streets, it may not be that big of a deal...especially if you are quite young. Also, you could certainly add that little tidbit to your profile.
As far as the "society being focused on weight" thing...I don't see it that way at all. For me, fitness is a HUGE part of my lifestyle, always has been, and someone that doesn't have the same focus, would not be a good fit for me. A "perfect" body is never what I am looking for, but someone that has a serious and disciplined approach to their own health and fitness, is. And that can certainly go both ways.
Anyway, I posted a pic of me when I was thinner. I said I was average in my profile (average in the US is size 14), but in the pic I was smaller. I didn't lie, I just did not post a more recent pic as I have none and that one I did post was a good pic of me. So now the most attractive guy on the site wants to meet me.
I have every intention of getting back down there in terms of weight, but obviously I cannot get it done in one week's time. I'd like to stall things and maybe meet him in a month, but he wanted to meet today! I am busy today and told him this. What to do? And no lectures please. I honestly didn't think it would come to this.
You lied. You need to tell him you're overweight and that the picture doesn't truthfully represent you. Then let him decide if he still wants to meet you. If he does, be prepared for rejection or for never getting a call back. You have nobody to blame but yourself for the situation you're in. Next time be honest. There are guys out there who like heavier women.
It's not that I consider a 14 average, rather it IS average, according to statistics. I consider that to be overweight, and maybe it is, but people are getting heftier. I only recently got a digital camera (I don't even have a DVD) so I guess I am a bit behind the times. Yes, I could have picked a few extra lbs, but I live in denial that I let things get so out of control in the past year. This is part of the reason I am quitting my job. I must have put on 15 extra lbs in the past five months. This time last year I was a size 4/6
How do you go up 4 or 5 sizes when 15 lbs was all you gained? Shouldnt you be an 8 or a small 10 gaining just 15?
Then this is exactly what you need to tell him. And change your profile picture. Even though statistically size 14 is average, most people consider that overweight. When one says "average" most people get the image of someone who is relatively in shape but doesn't work out.
Size 14 is ONLY considered "average" because the preponderance of fat people in the USA skews the average size to the chunky side of things. Truthfully, most size 14 women are chubby.
You lied. You need to tell him you're overweight and that the picture doesn't truthfully represent you. Then let him decide if he still wants to meet you. If he does, be prepared for rejection or for never getting a call back. You have nobody to blame but yourself for the situation you're in. Next time be honest. There are guys out there who like heavier women.
How do you go up 4 or 5 sizes when 15 lbs was all you gained? Shouldnt you be an 8 or a small 10 gaining just 15?
That was only part of it. I said that happened in the last five months. Oh heck, I will just take that whole profile down, lose weight, and throw it back up! So I didn't exactly think the whole thing through. My thoughts were that I'd get no takers. Or find no one that I'd be interested in that would be interested in me. It was done on a whim, on a lark. Maybe I'll just be honest and say that.
Size 14 is ONLY considered "average" because the preponderance of fat people in the USA skews the average size to the chunky side of things. Truthfully, most size 14 women are chubby.
Did you actually read what I wrote? Apparently, you didn't so here it is:
Originally Posted by CESpeed Then this is exactly what you need to tell him. And change your profile picture. Even though statistically size 14 is average, most people consider that overweight. When one says "average" most people get the image of someone who is relatively in shape but doesn't work out.
That was only part of it. I said that happened in the last five months. Oh heck, I will just take that whole profile down, lose weight, and throw it back up! So I didn't exactly think the whole thing through. My thoughts were that I'd get no takers. Or find no one that I'd be interested in that would be interested in me. It was done on a whim, on a lark. Maybe I'll just be honest and say that.
I don't see the need to take it down, unless you really are not interested in dating right now. Just put up a current pic, and be honest in your profile.
Wait Movin, I don't think the point is your weight!! Don't meet someone in person that you haven't spent some time getting to know on the phone and emails. God, after spending time on the phone and such he may throw out red flags and you may not want to meet him at all!!
If and when the time comes that you feel really comfortable meeting him, tell him you are heavier than your pic.
In the meantime, so you don't end up feeling like this anymore, put up a new profile with a current pic or weight a few months till you are more comfortable with yourself. Even if it doesn't matter the the guy, it seems to matter to you and you need to be comfortable with yourself first
Take a deep breath!!
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This is part of the reason I am quitting my job. I must have put on 15 extra lbs in the past five months. This time last year I was a size 4/6 
Apparently, you didn't so here it is:
