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View Poll Results: Can you have a healthy marriage without sex
Male -- No 37 26.62%
Male-- Yes 11 7.91%
Female -- No 64 46.04%
Female -- Yes 27 19.42%
Voters: 139. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-14-2009, 02:27 PM
 
Location: Fort Worth, Texas
10,593 posts, read 22,648,902 times
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I have heard others SAY they are happy and who am I to judge. I know how I am but I make no assumptions about others.

NOR do I venture to say that my way is the RIGHT and only way, it is simply what I am comfortable with.
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Old 02-14-2009, 02:29 PM
 
350 posts, read 2,042,552 times
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I am a woman and I voted yes. As long as their is emotional intimacy, and lots of affection--hugging, kissing, cuddling--then I think it's completely fine. As long as you have emotional and physical intimacy--hugging, kissing, cuddling, affection, playfulness--then I don't think you need actual sex to have a loving and fulfilling marriage.
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Old 02-14-2009, 02:36 PM
 
Location: Texas
14,469 posts, read 8,186,007 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kibblesandbits View Post
I am a woman and I voted yes. As long as their is emotional intimacy, and lots of affection--hugging, kissing, cuddling--then I think it's completely fine. As long as you have emotional and physical intimacy--hugging, kissing, cuddling, affection, playfulness--then I don't think you need actual sex to have a loving and fulfilling marriage.
I think that is the BEST thing for GF/BF but I think you actually need sex in a marraige.
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Old 02-14-2009, 02:42 PM
 
706 posts, read 970,858 times
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It's fairly unusual, but certainly you can!

As the human civilization advances, its rules can become more flexible, including explicit marriage contracts defining different types of marriages with different expectations. People can get married for the purpose of sharing custody of children and running a household in which to raise them, for which they might make an ideal parenting team, but not ideal sexual partners for each-other.
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Old 02-14-2009, 03:03 PM
 
57 posts, read 134,252 times
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Ok, I am an open minded person, more power to you. But just curious, isn't part of matramony being able to satisfy your spouse spiritually, emotionally, physically, so that they wouldn't ever look at another person and long for them. I mean, if a man is happy at home but isn't being pleased by his lady, can you honestly blame him for looking at, or worse, getting involved in a PHYSICAL relationship even though he truly loves you? Whats wrong? Sorry for prying but I think you's need a marriage councelar. ( I know I spelled it wrong)
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Old 02-14-2009, 03:11 PM
 
Location: Not where I want to be
1,113 posts, read 1,642,192 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jose Fernandez View Post
No disrespect, but if he's not getting it from you,(assuming you are a female) he is getting it from somewhere else. Unless it's okay with you that he go and relieve himself in your masterbathroom, on the internet then I guess it's ok. There's no way your significant other is not releasing himself somehow, again, no disrespect. Any guys out there with me???
What if the problem is not with her.....but him? Millions of men suffer from ED so not all is happy in winkie world. Can we assume then that since "she" is possibly not getting it, (according to your logic), she also is getting it from some where else? Or is it just a man thing?

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Old 02-14-2009, 03:17 PM
 
5,108 posts, read 7,735,250 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jose Fernandez View Post
Ok, I am an open minded person, more power to you. But just curious, isn't part of matramony being able to satisfy your spouse spiritually, emotionally, physically, so that they wouldn't ever look at another person and long for them. I mean, if a man is happy at home but isn't being pleased by his lady, can you honestly blame him for looking at, or worse, getting involved in a PHYSICAL relationship even though he truly loves you? Whats wrong? Sorry for prying but I think you's need a marriage councelar. ( I know I spelled it wrong)
Your posts have been courteous and respectful, thank you, I appreciate that.

My own sexual activity [which is plastered all over the CD forum on a variety of threads] is not the topic of this thread, but I am answering because you are being courteous. For me personally, sex is essential in a marriage or relationship. But the topic of the opening post is "Can you have a healthy marriage without sex?"

So the "you" in the opening post can be the singular personal "you" as in, you as an individual in your own life and your own relationships. Or it can be the plural "you" as in "you people" or "people in general" or "people out there in relationship."

For me individually, an active sex life is essential, so I can not have a happy marriage without sexual intimacy.

But I also know many married couples who are quite happy in their relationships without sex. So the answer to the question of can a marriage be happy without sex, the answer is yes because I personally know couples for whom this is the case.

I appreciate your willingness to engage in exchanging differing views in a manner that is thoughtful, courteous, and respectful. One of the benefits of participating in this forum, is opening to hear and learn and grow and expand our understanding, through the many views shared by all of us. Thank you.
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Old 02-14-2009, 03:19 PM
 
57 posts, read 134,252 times
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I guess in my nosy way, I was trying to see where the problem lies. You bring up a good point, and if it is a problem with 'him', maybe they can see someone who can prescribe something for him. Otherwise, if there is no resolution to the problem, I apologise for my ignorance and greatly respect this indivisual for their moral support to their spouse.
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Old 02-14-2009, 03:33 PM
 
57 posts, read 134,252 times
Reputation: 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by DimSumRaja View Post
Your posts have been courteous and respectful, thank you, I appreciate that.

My own sexual activity [which is plastered all over the CD forum on a variety of threads] is not the topic of this thread, but I am answering because you are being courteous. For me personally, sex is essential in a marriage or relationship. But the topic of the opening post is "Can you have a healthy marriage without sex?"

So the "you" in the opening post can be the singular personal "you" as in, you as an individual in your own life and your own relationships. Or it can be the plural "you" as in "you people" or "people in general" or "people out there in relationship."

For me individually, an active sex life is essential, so I can not have a happy marriage without sexual intimacy.

But I also know many married couples who are quite happy in their relationships without sex. So the answer to the question of can a marriage be happy without sex, the answer is yes because I personally know couples for whom this is the case.

I appreciate your willingness to engage in exchanging differing views in a manner that is thoughtful, courteous, and respectful. One of the benefits of participating in this forum, is opening to hear and learn and grow and expand our understanding, through the many views shared by all of us. Thank you.
Thanks, I'm glad that we agree that we were just sharing insight. Life is short, and I find nothing wrong with people living their lives any way they need to, to make them happy.
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Old 02-14-2009, 03:34 PM
 
Location: Not where I want to be
1,113 posts, read 1,642,192 times
Reputation: 424
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jose Fernandez View Post
I guess in my nosy way, I was trying to see where the problem lies. You bring up a good point, and if it is a problem with 'him', maybe they can see someone who can prescribe something for him. Otherwise, if there is no resolution to the problem, I apologise for my ignorance and greatly respect this indivisual for their moral support to their spouse.
I find it ironic and very selfish that when men are not having sex, the first thing they want to do is find another person to fulfill this need. However, when it is the man who cannot have sex, the woman is encouraged to "suppress" her desires for sex and stand by her man.

Pills don't work for everyone. I had a patient who fell from a tree stand, fell on his back side and damaged nerves in his lower back and legs. The nerves are responsible for various daily functions, including going to the bathroom (which he couldn't do most of the time) and also getting and maintaining an erection. So now what's his wife to do? Pills won't work, surgery won't regrow nerves. Should she leave him after 35 years of marriage because they can't have sex anymore? This can happen to anyone. A car accident, a job accident, playing sports, etc.

Point being.....marriage can and does work without sex. Perhaps many of the posters in this thread can't see it personally because it hasn't happened to them but when it does happen to you, just like anything else, you pick up the pieces and move on. There is more to life then sex.
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