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So yea, these days I just feel lonely and I think I get mild bouts of depression from time to time.
I mean a few guys have been interested, but I just couldn't find myself with them, so I know that the problem is basically me.....I guess I'm just sort of picky.
Also, I don't go out much, but where can I go? Sure there are the movies, but those are expensive and the girl friends are either working or with their beaus. Also, I look a bit young for my age, so I wouldn't feel comfortable going to a club or eat-in bar or any of that stuff (nor do I like those types of environments much anyway), and as a college students, I'm pretty much spending frugally in these hard times (and with gas? YIKES!).
I know I shouldn't really worry at this point, but I just get the feeling that I'll be alone for the rest of my life. Besides, what guy wants a girl who hasn't even been kissed?
I am starting college in the outskirts of NYC in the Fall, but with the workload and commuting from school to home and vice versa, I don't think I'd be able to maintain a relationship, and that just doesn't make me look forward to this coming semster.
I know having a relationship isn't everything, but I just want to have a male companion who can give me affection (I'd give to him as well) and who I can share my highs and lows with (by highs, I don't mean bragging, and by lows, I don't mean complaining).
It makes me tear up a little bit even now just thinking about wanting that.
So yea, these days I just feel lonely and I think I get mild bouts of depression from time to time.
I mean a few guys have been interested, but I just couldn't find myself with them, so I know that the problem is basically me.....I guess I'm just sort of picky.
Also, I don't go out much, but where can I go? Sure there are the movies, but those are expensive and the girl friends are either working or with their beaus. Also, I look a bit young for my age, so I wouldn't feel comfortable going to a club or eat-in bar or any of that stuff (nor do I like those types of environments much anyway), and as a college students, I'm pretty much spending frugally in these hard times (and with gas? YIKES!).
I know I shouldn't really worry at this point, but I just get the feeling that I'll be alone for the rest of my life. Besides, what guy wants a girl who hasn't even been kissed?
I am starting college in the outskirts of NYC in the Fall, but with the workload and commuting from school to home and vice versa, I don't think I'd be able to maintain a relationship, and that just doesn't make me look forward to this coming semster.
I know having a relationship isn't everything, but I just want to have a male companion who can give me affection (I'd give to him as well) and who I can share my highs and lows with (by highs, I don't mean bragging, and by lows, I don't mean complaining).
It makes me tear up a little bit even now just thinking about wanting that.
It just sucks, you know?
I don't agree that the problem is you. The "problem" could well be that you are true to yourself.
A lot of guys would want a girl that hasn't been kissed; you're only 20, I know that it's the oldest you've ever been, but you really are a baby; and this is a good thing. You got nothin' but time ahead of you. Whatever you do, don't sweat it away.
Loneliness is painful, I agree, but what's worse are relationships that drag you down, tear at your soul, and test your character. Not to blow smoke, but you sound smart..
and maybe a little too authentic for superficiality. Hang in there, you aren't alone.
To OP;
You sound a bit introverted - there might be a slight problem.
Not that it's a bad thing, but it might become an obstruction for your social life somewhat.
To OP;
You sound a bit introverted - there might be a slight problem.
Not that it's a bad thing, but it might become an obstruction for your social life somewhat.
I'm about to turn 25 and I have no problem having one night stands, but serious relationships. Well they are hard for me to have. Don't worry there is no time line unless you want one.
So yea, these days I just feel lonely and I think I get mild bouts of depression from time to time.
I mean a few guys have been interested, but I just couldn't find myself with them, so I know that the problem is basically me.....I guess I'm just sort of picky.
Also, I don't go out much, but where can I go? Sure there are the movies, but those are expensive and the girl friends are either working or with their beaus. Also, I look a bit young for my age, so I wouldn't feel comfortable going to a club or eat-in bar or any of that stuff (nor do I like those types of environments much anyway), and as a college students, I'm pretty much spending frugally in these hard times (and with gas? YIKES!).
I know I shouldn't really worry at this point, but I just get the feeling that I'll be alone for the rest of my life. Besides, what guy wants a girl who hasn't even been kissed?
I am starting college in the outskirts of NYC in the Fall, but with the workload and commuting from school to home and vice versa, I don't think I'd be able to maintain a relationship, and that just doesn't make me look forward to this coming semster.
I know having a relationship isn't everything, but I just want to have a male companion who can give me affection (I'd give to him as well) and who I can share my highs and lows with (by highs, I don't mean bragging, and by lows, I don't mean complaining).
It makes me tear up a little bit even now just thinking about wanting that.
It just sucks, you know?
Hey now, I'm 24 but male, and in the same situation. So, you are not alone.
Like you also, I've had others interested in me, but being the socially-awkward man that I am, couldn't bring myself to make either the hot or cold approaches presented to me.
Just keep putting yourself in social situations and hope that some confident dude will sweep you off your feet! As for me, I'm a lost cause...you have potential though!
21, same here too. Sometimes I desire to be in a relationship but my best guess is that now is not the time. I'm going to graduate this May(yay!) so I got to settle down and find me some moolas. I guess it really depends how you approach lonely feelings and the way I'm dealing this is through friendship, activities, and volunteering. Mr. Humble is quite right on something, relationships that tear you apart is worse than loneliness.
I'mma give you some advice for fixing the situation.
1) Are you fat? Go on a diet. This is absolute poison for a girl looking for a relationship. Once you're not significantly overweight, go to 2.
2) Okay, so now you're not actively unattractive. Time to find guys! Does your college program have a decently even gender ratio? GREAT, go directly to 4, otherwise, continue to 3.
3) Do stuff that brings you in contact with guys you might be interested in. This can be activities, bars, heck, even online-dating sites.
4) Be proactive. You may or may not be "approachable" It is far easier to just go after the guys you want (aggressive [really blatant, we are stupid and can't read signals unless bashed over the head] flirt, and/or ask out the guys you want yourself) than to fix this problem.
5) Still can't find a date/relationship? You are too picky. Every other girl near new york wants to date the good looking, debonair banker, and their chances of doing so are comically low. Lower your standards, or stay alone until you get lucky, which could take anywhere between a while and never.
I'mma give you some advice for fixing the situation.
1) Are you fat? Go on a diet. This is absolute poison for a girl looking for a relationship. Once you're not significantly overweight, go to 2.
2) Okay, so now you're not actively unattractive. Time to find guys! Does your college program have a decently even gender ratio? GREAT, go directly to 4, otherwise, continue to 3.
3) Do stuff that brings you in contact with guys you might be interested in. This can be activities, bars, heck, even online-dating sites.
4) Be proactive. You may or may not be "approachable" It is far easier to just go after the guys you want (aggressive [really blatant, we are stupid and can't read signals unless bashed over the head] flirt, and/or ask out the guys you want yourself) than to fix this problem.
5) Still can't find a date/relationship? You are too picky. Every other girl near new york wants to date the good looking, debonair banker, and their chances of doing so are comically low. Lower your standards, or stay alone until you get lucky, which could take anywhere between a while and never.
Blunt but effective. I like it. Let me just add that a change of attitude will greatly improve your chances. Never underestimate the power of a woman with a positive attitude. if your not too confident in your looks, this will help. Just throw in a little flirting so you don't become the friend (yes it happens to women too).
You are still extremely young. You will find someone. Don't look for it in bars and typical pick up spots. You'll only meet the wrong type of people there. We all go through periods of being lonely, it's normal. Also, when you meet that someone, they will appreciate that you haven't been "around." At least any decent guy looking for someone to marry would.
So don't worry, go about your life and cheer up because you might meet that special someone when you least expect it.
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