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Husband and wife, or boyfriend and girlfriend. What do you fight about, if you do. Some of you are lucky and are happy enough not too fight too much.
Between my wife and I, neither of us like to fight. So instead of hashing it out, it doesn't even get talked about. That's not good either. Better to fight and get it out than let it build up. When we do, it is usually about her family.
DFOR
My stbx and I were like you and your wife. I believe that lack of communication even if it is lack of arguement is the core reason for our divorce.
My bf and I mostly argue when he tries to tell me what to do and when he keeps me awake, alarm going off when we dont have to get up, snoring, talking in his sleep, etc.
We've probably had 2 arguments. One was about her notion of 'knowing what guys need' and her lack of action, and it really bothered me. The other was her being in a needy mood and me not being in the mood for it. Both of those had some pretty loud moments, and in one, I hung up on her (she HATES that, I have learned).
The rest are just us expressing how we feel about things, even if it's very animated and loud. These come up from time to time. Most of the time it's me feelings some way, never discussing it until it gets to a point I can't deal with it anymore. I don't consider those arguments because it's not from an angry state.
What I love about my girl is that she isn't argumentive- so she just doesn't like to pick just for the sake of getting a rise out of me. I'm learning to pick my battles- some things I just have to leave alone.
The wife says I take up all of the bed space and that's a lie. She says I snore but I've never heard myself snore. These are just minute things we argue about.
We used to argue a lot when we were younger but I don't even remember what about. Something stupid I'm sure. Now we rarely argue, I don't even know when the last time was. Most things can be resolved if you speak respectfully and calmly and work at seeing the other person's viewpoint. I have also got along much better with my husband after I realized that he actually could not read my mind (body language) the way other women can - I have to talk to him.
We are fighting at lot about hubby's stupid dad. He is on old drunk, go from crisis to crisis. IMO, it is just for attention. He was just in the hospital with the DT's. I don't answer the phone when he calls.
It seems I am arguing most about not wanting to argue. Every little decision with the STBX turns into an arguement even while I am saying "Really we can just talk about this."
It seems I am arguing most about not wanting to argue. Every little decision with the STBX turns into an arguement even while I am saying "Really we can just talk about this."
I argue about always having to play by his rules, but then I'm just arguing by myself because he can't face anything and needs to ignore the problem and go sit under a tree and think. And it's only minor issues really, which makes me worry about if it were major. I probably wouldn't see him for a year or so then. This is probably why I'm going to be single again very soon. That type of behavior is childish to me. Two adults should be able to talk about problems and reach a solution together.
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