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Old 04-05-2009, 09:16 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, TN
8,002 posts, read 18,584,172 times
Reputation: 12357

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Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
You people are funny... Well, you could've had kids with somebody else and you wouldn't love them any less. It's not like you order kids from a catalog or you know what they're gonna be like... You just saw them and decided that's exactly what you wanted! The result would've been precisely the same if you had your children with another person.
But they wouldn't have been as cute as the ones we have now

And by the way, YES my legs were shaved
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Old 04-05-2009, 09:45 PM
 
390 posts, read 904,087 times
Reputation: 240
Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
You people are funny... Well, you could've had kids with somebody else and you wouldn't love them any less. It's not like you order kids from a catalog or you know what they're gonna be like... You just saw them and decided that's exactly what you wanted! The result would've been precisely the same if you had your children with another person.
Again Sierra, right on the money. The things u say I only wish I had the b**** to say.
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Old 04-05-2009, 09:57 PM
 
Location: Hot Springs, AR
5,612 posts, read 15,092,051 times
Reputation: 3787
There are two decisions I wish I could change: The first: I allowed people to talk me out of getting my mother to handle an emergency and my grandmother died as a result. The second: I decided to exclude someone from my life and in a moment of weakness changed my mind.

I firmly believe that changing one or both of those decisions would have drastically changed my life for the better.
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Old 04-05-2009, 10:34 PM
 
37,495 posts, read 45,798,776 times
Reputation: 57001
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boneheaded View Post
PTC has a thread going talking about how much we have changed. Her thread has me thinking back over the years. I start to say if I could only have that choice over again......

I find that the greatest things in my life have come from the most difficult times. I think I would probably loose everything I love if I had made a different choice.

So if you had just one decision to make over...Would you? What is it and why?
You know, I've asked myself this question a few times...but I always answer it the same way...no. Changing something in the past would mean risking not having had my son...and he's simply the greatest single thing in my life. Having a child with the man I did was a union of two very like-minded individuals, on the parenting front, and most couples I know haven't had the success we have had with our son. Nope. Wouldn't want to chance it any other way.
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Old 04-05-2009, 10:49 PM
 
900 posts, read 1,699,676 times
Reputation: 489
I spend a lot of time thinking lately. Always was a thinker , but even more so now. I could not go back to anything when I was in my 20s or younger because I always think I wouldn't have my pets if I chose differently. However, I was thinking maybe 4 years ago, if Id left my husband then, maybe I would be in a better place now. And I feel guilty for thinking that, because he's been nice lately (to make up for earlier jackassery- so nice it takes a second to remember what he did -general alcoholic behavior.) But yes, 4 years ago may have been the ideal time. And then again, maybe not. Very hard question OP- answers Ill guess you'll get is to have not dropped out of college , or let "the one" get away. Stuff like that. Me, I do wonder where I went wrong, but I don't think one different choice would solve it. Many mistakes led here.
Just wanted to share this - I watch Big Love. And the main character (show is about polygamists, Bill is married to 3 women) , Bill whom I think is usually a jerk, said to his daughter "you know, if you find yourself on the wrong path becasue of a choice you made, all you have to do is give yourself permission to change your mind. (and get back on the right path again- something like that.) Is it really that easy, if you can identify the 1st (as in worst) way you turned wrong? Great post OP.
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Old 04-05-2009, 10:52 PM
 
900 posts, read 1,699,676 times
Reputation: 489
reading other people's posts, some things can't be undone............
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Old 04-06-2009, 12:34 AM
 
Location: In my skin
9,230 posts, read 16,517,749 times
Reputation: 9174
I should have married "the one".

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Old 04-06-2009, 01:40 AM
 
Location: The O.C.--Soon, ATL
670 posts, read 2,111,901 times
Reputation: 654
[quote=Boneheaded;8200177]

So if you had just one decision to make over...Would you? What is it and why?[/quote]

I have several things I wish I could "do over" in my life, but the most important one is that I met a very special, once-in-a-lifetime type guy, and missed an opportunity to tell him how I felt about him.

I met him on vacation, figured this was probably just a casual thing for him, was incredibly swept off my feet by him (and I'm not a hopeless romantic, so this is hard for me to even admit) and hesitated when he asked me how I felt. I was afraid that if I told him what I was feeling it would be too much, too soon, and he'd pull back. He gave me two opportunities to tell him and both times, I was too overwhelmed to find the words. Everything was happening very fast and I usually need time to mull things over. I ended up losing the chance as a result. We remained in touch, built a strong long distance friendship, have stayed friends for almost two years now, but I can't get back that moment that I lost. And it may forever haunt me.

In my life, I've lived with hatred directed at me, with rejection, even with public humiliation, but it's very hard to live with regret. I know that I can love someone else because I have a big heart, but I will carry this feeling of loss with me for a long time. I'm just lucky, so far, that he has kept me in his life as a friend. He has been a very good friend to me and knowing him has helped me strive to be a better person.

So the decision I would do over is that I would have spoken from my heart, even if it was risky. And I've tried to learn during the past year to be more direct and say exactly what I'm thinking and what I need, rather then expecting others to read between the lines. I don't pretend to have all the answers; I've made so many mistakes. But I tell this to anyone who confides in me that they have feelings for someone but don't know if they should say anything: Don't hesitate. Life's too short. The only way people connect is if we speak up. What's the worst that can happen? That you find out the other person doesn't feel the same? Better to know than to wonder. As long as you share your feelings in a respectful way with a regard for the other person, you have nothing to be embarrassed about. Even if the other person doesn't feel the same, a mature individual should respect and admire you for having the courage to take a chance and speak from your heart.

Anyway, this is what I've learned from my own lack of courage and my own huge mistake. Hope it helps someone else from making a similar one.
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Old 04-06-2009, 05:30 AM
 
Location: Texas
1,226 posts, read 2,794,758 times
Reputation: 686
Thanks for adding your stories. I feel a bit better knowing I am not the only masochistic fool that enjoys the fruits of pain. That is said very tongue in cheek by the way.

I really do appreciate all the input THANKS!
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Old 04-06-2009, 06:56 AM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,042,435 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by MonaLisaVito View Post
But they wouldn't have been as cute as the ones we have now
True - they could've been cuter!

Quote:
And by the way, YES my legs were shaved
I'm in awe of your moral restraint, sweetie!

Quote:
Originally Posted by oregonwana_b View Post
Again Sierra, right on the money. The things u say I only wish I had the b**** to say.
Somebody's gotta do that thankless job - every village should have a resident the rest love to hate.
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