I am ready to spread my wings!!!!!! (social, different, interested)

[Wisteria]

Yorkie: He told me before he went to bed that we should go and see the grandkids for Easter since this may be the last Easter we see them, I am thinking because of moving, WRONG, it is in case we should die between now and then, WTF, he can go but not I, besides he said we should get them a little something for Easter, NO mention of getting his OWN daughter anything.

I'd be cautious about statements like that. I don't want to start anything, however, someone who says that they may not be around next year because you could all be dead, could be a threat in disguise.

I don't know what your interactions are with your husband outside of what you have related here, however, if he is abusive, then you need to leave. Saying you may be dead next year, may be a threat that needs to be taken seriously.

Please use caution, and do see a lawyer, asap. It sounds like there may be some ambivalence in leaving your husband, or starting over alone.....you're doing a good job at recognizing the abuse and trying to make changes, however, you need to follow through to be completely safe.

See an attorney and also contact your local Women's Shelter for Domestic Violence. You may be able to participate in a support group of other women who have experienced the same thing, and it could give you good information and assistance.

Good luck, Yorkie!

[dreamofmonterey]

http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/...al_abuse/50466

yorkie- there is no doubt on the emotional abuse. Please read. Also if you move to some states, you become an automatic resident after 6 months- that means you may lose your MN residency- and it is possible that is what he wants. Don't tell him anything, and consult a lawyer asap.

[Carat98]

Originally Posted by NewHomeHappy

My Motto: Oh Honey, don't worry, I won't take half, I'll take it all.

So the gloves are off? Cool. After reading your story, you got my "Jersey" fired up.

It sounds like you've already started doing this but if not, start squirrling away all the cash/vaulables you can get you hands on now. Also, start documenting the verbal/physical abuse (if any) Don't bank the cash, hide it. Also, don't give away your little secret. Act normal.

Good advice given already : Get a blood sucking SOB lawyer and go for the jugular vein in court. After 23 years of eating $hit, you deserve everything good from him. MONEY. After all, what else is he good for?

It's never too late to start your life over again. Remember your value You have friends here and we're all in your corner.

Good advice given by you and most everyone on this board!!!! You go girl....get rid of the sob.....he doesn't deserve you.

[jhlcomp]

Please don't take offense in what I am saying. What would happen if you stopped engaging with him? It seems he knows how to get to you and your reactions seem to be his entertainment.

[brikag]

Yorkie_Mom....
I wonder if he's cheating on you! Do you think that? I'll explain later....

[Yorkie_Mom]

Good advice everyone, I have been busy packing all day, so I haven't seen much of him. I know some of you are right with the joking around, and that is all that it is, I was getting help with my computer problems and Ronzo sp? was helping find out what was wrong with this stupid thing.
He is really smart when it comes to computers, I guess I will find out when I shut this thing down for the night. Just so everyone knows, I do not have any boyfriends or boy toys. Maybe things will look up some day, but for now I am on my own. Thanks everyone, it is good to know I have people who are looking out for me. Take care, Yorkie

[cold_eh_ND]

I have been in a few abusive relationships and I can tell you that you're in one now! Just because it's not physical doesn't mean it's not abusive. You sound truly unhappy and I agree it's time to move on. Show HIM how perfect HIS life is without you (guarantee he tries crawling back with loads of promises, but DON'T accept cause things won't change). I've said it a thousand times and I'm saying it again...you have ONE life! Is it worth it to stay?
Didn't think so!
Do it for yourself. Live life how YOU want to live it. Do things for YOU. Make yourself happy!!! Who gives a flip what he does. From this point on, live for YOU!

ps...make sure you contact a lawyer first before leaving for info. Protect yourself FIRST!

[dreamofmonterey]

Good advice. Emotional/verbal abuse can be subtle- and oftentimes more psychologically damaging. He will never change- look how he treats the daughter as well- please know everyone is concerned.

[Yorkie_Mom]

Originally Posted by sunnyhelena

http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/...al_abuse/50466

yorkie- there is no doubt on the emotional abuse. Please read. Also if you move to some states, you become an automatic resident after 6 months- that means you may lose your MN residency- and it is possible that is what he wants. Don't tell him anything, and consult a lawyer asap.

I read the article, it sounds like so much that has gone on here. It makes me feel so much better to have you all backing me, and helping with keeping up the self-esteem level, to get me this far. I am not backing down or plan on changing my mind.
I will make sure that I contact an attorney before I do anything rash, for right now my plans are to keep packing and getting ready for the big move, once I get to where most of the packing is done, I will see an attorney, and ask there advice as to what I should do.
Since I am now in my fourties, I have learned from many mistakes, and I don't plan on making any more, I just want to find some form of peace and happiness where I can live out the rest of my days.
I will keep everyone informed as to what all happens since you all are like family, no I can't say that, you are better then any family that I have living. So thank you all from the bottom of my heart!!!! Yorkie

[Wisteria]

Hi Yorkie Mom,
I was just checking into see how you are doing. Did Hoosier Guy get you set up with an attorney and all?? I hope you are well.