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04-15-2009, 09:19 AM
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Location: Philly
1,776 posts, read 2,018,548 times
Reputation: 782
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Do you 'make' conversation?
My girl does this. For instance, she will ask questions that she knows the answers to. Like this morning she asked me the last time I worked out. I'm at the gym in the AM before work by habit at least 4x per week. And she knows that.
When I read it, I got annoyed. My response (in the nicest tone) was "As you know I try to get there every weekday morning, if I can.......". She replies "I know, just making conversation."
I don't want to make this a gender thing, but is this something that ladies tend to do? Or does either sex do this in a LTR for the sake of communication? Is there another way to do this?
We've had discussions about this before. I try to assume that she's really asking 'How was the gym this morning' or something like that, but I hate assuming, and if that's what she wanted to know, she'd ask that. Sometimes I can be too literal, but as my SO, questions like that really pluck at my nerves! 
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04-15-2009, 09:23 AM
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Location: Cumberland Co., TN
9,085 posts, read 7,759,596 times
Reputation: 8389
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I dont think it is a gender issue. My boyfriend does this also. Its just his nature to always be engaged in conversation and Im more of the quiet type. I just answer yep or nope. That annoys him.
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04-15-2009, 09:23 AM
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Location: Chicago, Illinois
2,924 posts, read 4,798,415 times
Reputation: 1199
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well, starting conversation and asking stupid questions are two entirely different things. also, some people don't like lulls in conversation so they'll fill the void. i'll make conversation just to make the day more interesting but i'm not going to ask a question that i already know the answer to.
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04-15-2009, 09:32 AM
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20,509 posts, read 18,108,179 times
Reputation: 24232
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I'm not one of those people who are uncomfortable with silence and will blurt out anything just to talk. At the same time, I do enjoy good conversation and don't have a problem initiating it.
However, in the eight years since I sold my biz and began working out of the house, I've found the lack of human contact during the day to affect me somewhat. So when my wife comes home from the office, I have to really restrain myself from talking all about my day and hers. She is in a high-stress job and usually needs a good 30 or 45 minutes to just decompress. It was very hard for me to learn to just leave her the heck alone while she gets the office out of her head.
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04-15-2009, 09:46 AM
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6,703 posts, read 5,952,834 times
Reputation: 5126
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I see nothing wrong in just making conversation. I know some people can't stand it, which is why the person "making" conversation needs to be observant and look for signs that the other person is open to talking. Some people talk too much about nothing. Those people wear me out. On the other hand, if you're someone who can never engage in small talk, it makes me wonder what the big deal is.
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04-15-2009, 10:19 AM
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Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,161 posts, read 14,566,408 times
Reputation: 11476
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Some people just can't appreciate silence and non-verbal communication - in fact I would say a lot of us have grown unaccustomed to it. We're too occupied with things.
On the other hand I can sympathize with the wife who feels neglected, whose husband barely says a word to her, who has to try to make conversation.
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04-15-2009, 10:23 AM
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5,111 posts, read 3,627,516 times
Reputation: 4163
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IZthe411
My girl does this. For instance, she will ask questions that she knows the answers to. Like this morning she asked me the last time I worked out. I'm at the gym in the AM before work by habit at least 4x per week. And she knows that.
When I read it, I got annoyed. My response (in the nicest tone) was "As you know I try to get there every weekday morning, if I can.......". She replies "I know, just making conversation."
I don't want to make this a gender thing, but is this something that ladies tend to do? Or does either sex do this in a LTR for the sake of communication? Is there another way to do this?
We've had discussions about this before. I try to assume that she's really asking 'How was the gym this morning' or something like that, but I hate assuming, and if that's what she wanted to know, she'd ask that. Sometimes I can be too literal, but as my SO, questions like that really pluck at my nerves! 
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Oh no she did-nt!!
I would have switched the roles on her and played the woman...
"Are you saying I'm fat?!?!?"

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04-15-2009, 11:01 AM
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Location: The Hall of Justice
17,913 posts, read 11,813,743 times
Reputation: 23297
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Quote:
Originally Posted by At1WithNature
well, starting conversation and asking stupid questions are two entirely different things. also, some people don't like lulls in conversation so they'll fill the void. i'll make conversation just to make the day more interesting but i'm not going to ask a question that i already know the answer to.
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^ I agree!
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04-15-2009, 11:06 AM
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Location: Cumberland Co., TN
9,085 posts, read 7,759,596 times
Reputation: 8389
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Quote:
Oh no she did-nt!! 
I would have switched the roles on her and played the woman...
"Are you saying I'm fat?!?!?"
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Good one Funnymann
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04-15-2009, 11:07 AM
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Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,161 posts, read 14,566,408 times
Reputation: 11476
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Are any other guys here like me - they want a gf so much they are almost envious/long for all the negative things that come with relationships? Like the nagging, small talk.etc? Well maybe not the nagging, but the other things? haha
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