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Old 04-03-2007, 07:52 AM
 
Location: Just a few miles outside of St. Louis
1,921 posts, read 5,621,252 times
Reputation: 1250

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Well, here's a thread that I definitely have a say so about! My husband is 14 years older than me. We've been together for over 26 years. We have two children, and six grandchildren, (four are from his older daughter, who is eight younger than myself, but we have always gotten along). We have many interests in common, we tend to like much of the same music and movies, etc. He's very young, at heart, but not immature. We've always been pretty happy together. Not everyone would want to be married to someone a bit older than themselves, but I've never had a problem with the age factor. Obviously, it has to do with our personalities. I couldn't be married to just anyone 14 years older. But, it works with us. My parents were only about a year and a half apart, and they made me miserable, as a kid, because they fought like hellcats! So, as was said before, age is relative.
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Old 04-03-2007, 07:57 AM
 
Location: On my way to South Florida!!!
90 posts, read 368,419 times
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My sisters husband is considerably younger than she is which caused a family ruckus but honestly they are PERFECT for each other. He takes wonderful care of her and they are raising a beautiful family.
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Old 04-03-2007, 08:15 AM
 
Location: a primitive state
11,395 posts, read 24,445,382 times
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I know there's always been some sort of social stigma attached to women dating and marrying younger men. But biologically it makes much more sense as women tend to live longer and reach sexual later.

Personally, I've gotten so old I wouldn't want to date someone much older than I am, that would make him ancient! LOL

But I'm also so young that I wouldn't want to date a child either. 3 or 4 years difference on either side is plenty.

Last edited by ellie; 04-03-2007 at 08:58 AM..
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Old 04-03-2007, 08:23 AM
 
Location: God's Country
23,014 posts, read 34,376,254 times
Reputation: 31644
Quote:
Originally Posted by tet tea View Post
My friend is six years older than her boyfrend who is 26. Most people I know seem shocked by this, but don't bat an eyelid when it's the reverse. I personally don't see anything wrong with it. I just don't get it.

Now, if the age difference is quite considerable say 20 years plus, then I kind of wonder.
I don't think six years is a big deal, 20 years yea that's too much. My step daughter married a man 22 years older than her. They ended up divorced just like I thought they would. I did support the marriage as long it lasted.
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Old 04-03-2007, 09:04 AM
 
Location: Vero Beach, Fl
2,976 posts, read 13,372,234 times
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My first marriage was to a man 24 years older than I. It was a perfect match. He passed away from a terminal illness. One and one half years after his death, I met my soul mate and he is younger.

Much depends on where you are in your life (head wise) and age is just a number.
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Old 04-03-2007, 09:19 AM
 
1,501 posts, read 5,680,417 times
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Cosmic nailed it.

Age does not matter if people really care about each other, the "attraction" thing will only wear off in time, so it's quickly kaput if there's no foundation beyond that anyway.

Because of interests, and just being able to interact every day being accepted more for who you are, oder men tended to be more secure and comfortable, while ones my age were always a little tougher to even be friends with unless they're gay. Consistent even in the workplace through the years. Looking back, it's been more blessings than anything.

Got over being frustrated over guys my age who I tried to get closer to long ago. Just finally accepted it. But it was toughest in high school when I pined to go to the prom with a cutie I had a crush on for two years, and only older men knew I was alive and liked me for who I was and had the same things in common. So ended up spontaneously spending Sr. prom night somewhere else with higher age group, amidst favorite pro sports team heroes (talk about being beyond lucky for this fan!) and just fitting in comfortably instead of crying about who so & so's dancing with :>) What prom?!

Best thing is, these older ones weren't users, like what all my friends & relatives were going through.

Believe in Divine Intervention anyway, so one less thing to worry about :>)
Go with your heart. Care trumps all.
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Old 04-03-2007, 09:30 AM
 
Location: Lots of sun and palm trees with occasional hurricane :)
8,293 posts, read 16,157,785 times
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Hummm. My stepfather was 20 yrs. older than my mother and I know she was not happy (for almost 40 yrs!). They were just totally not made for each other so that cured me of older men, I think.
My first husband is 9 yrs older than I. Maybe we were not right for each other at that stage of my life. My 2nd husband, I was in my early 30's and was 3.5 yrs. older than him. It took me forever to get over being the older one in the relationship but once I did, I think we had our age timing right.

I've never "looked" for younger men but it seems it just happens that way with me and now, I've been with my current "husband" for five years and I am 12 years older than he is, but he's much older than I am character wise. I keep telling him that it's a good thing I probably won't be around when he's 70 because he's so crabby now, I would not be able to put up with him when he start catching up chronologically.

Sometimes I feel like I want someone whose back aches more frequently.
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Old 04-03-2007, 10:57 AM
 
Location: Miami. Florida
942 posts, read 2,583,375 times
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Ok...you could take a seat for this one. When I married at seventeen I marreid someone eleven years older than I (he was 28). We divorced four and a half years latter after three beautiful boys. I came from a really STRICT family and had to marry to get out of the house. By the way this guy was super immature!!!


At the age of twenty two I started a live in relationship with someone twenty six years older than me. I was 22 he was 48. I was happy, very happy, we were together until I was twenty nine. I would've lived happily ever after with him, I trully was in love. He left me for my best friend!!! She actually was closer to his age.

Two years latter I met my husband. He is four years older than me and I love him dearly. He is my companion, my friend and my lover. I trully feel blessed. He has stuck by me giving me unconditional support through my cancer, my childrens dilemas and all our financial problems.

I do think that eventually I would have felt the age difference between myself and my second partner. But I will never know. In the end he did me favor. I think he was seeing our age gap and took measures in his own hands. Atleast this is what I would like to think. Maybe justifying things on my part.
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Old 04-03-2007, 10:59 AM
 
Location: Miami. Florida
942 posts, read 2,583,375 times
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Oh by the way my mom is twenty one years my stepfathers senior and the have been married 20 years!!!! And happily.
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Old 04-03-2007, 11:12 AM
 
Location: Coachella Valley, California
15,639 posts, read 41,031,245 times
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My husband is 17 years older than me. We are happy for the most part, but there are age differences. If I were ever to be single again for any reason, I would not marry again. However, I would date, but I would date guys closer to my age.
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