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Old 04-30-2009, 01:28 AM
 
Location: Coachella Valley, California
15,639 posts, read 40,977,505 times
Reputation: 13467

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Quote:
Originally Posted by killer2021 View Post
Sorry sweetheart but if this tactic did not work, men would not use it. You have absolutely no experience dating women at all. So I wouldn't be talking.

Oh and if I did meet a ***** like you (who probably doesn't put out until the 6,000th date) you would be out of the running pretty damn quick. I wouldn't even bother calling you. I can smell feminists like yourself from a mile away. I don't tolerate any attitude from women. When you are with me, it is my way or you are done. Plenty of other women out there who are willing to get the job done.
Is that so? Is that how your dad treated your mother? They must be so proud!
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Old 04-30-2009, 01:30 AM
 
3,852 posts, read 12,849,434 times
Reputation: 2529
Quote:
Originally Posted by Twinkle Toes View Post
Is that so? Is that how your dad treated your mother? They must be so proud!
lmao I have no idea but she must've got the job done pretty good
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Old 04-30-2009, 01:35 AM
Status: "It Can't Rain All The Time" (set 3 days ago)
 
Location: North Pacific
15,755 posts, read 7,564,141 times
Reputation: 2576
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sprawling_Homeowner View Post
Kinda weird I was thinking of this.

I got me a date this Friday, and the few phone calls we've had (we have not yet met) were long and pleasant.

Comparing to some of the pre-first date calls I had with some other girls, these calls went well. And with some of the women with whom I had not so flowing calls, I later developed chemistry, we clicked, things happened, etc.

I'm taking this seriously... she seems to have long-term potential.

So here I am, planning the evening (I feel like a master of dates... choose a cool restaurant that is not far from a trendy, classy, mature bar or lounge AND have a back-up in case the first choice is packed or noisy or what not).

I'm reminding myself to call the lady after as I always do - 2 to 3 days later - to "follow up." I know I will ask her at the end if we can meet again (and every time I wanted to meet again and popped that question, I got a "yes" and always took them out a 2nd, 3rd, time, etc).

Yet, I thought. DO I seem desperate if I call the very next day? I don't recall ever having done so after a first date.

Women, what's the longest a man is allowed to go between date 1 and follow-up call before you dismiss him as a player, as someone who is not interested, or what not?

(tired... gotta go to bed. can't think straight.)
Ask, "Would you like me to call you tomorrow?" I think people stress and fuss too much about stuff. To me the simplicity is to go straight to the source...the other person. There is always that assumption thing that gets people into trouble.

Talking one to another is what sets the boundaries and space within the relationship on both sides and on the individual level. No two minds think exactly alike. If left to assumption you'll be forever a wonder.
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Old 04-30-2009, 04:40 AM
 
Location: Rockland County New York
2,984 posts, read 5,848,574 times
Reputation: 1298
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sprawling_Homeowner View Post
Kinda weird I was thinking of this.

I got me a date this Friday, and the few phone calls we've had (we have not yet met) were long and pleasant.

Comparing to some of the pre-first date calls I had with some other girls, these calls went well. And with some of the women with whom I had not so flowing calls, I later developed chemistry, we clicked, things happened, etc.

I'm taking this seriously... she seems to have long-term potential.

So here I am, planning the evening (I feel like a master of dates... choose a cool restaurant that is not far from a trendy, classy, mature bar or lounge AND have a back-up in case the first choice is packed or noisy or what not).

I'm reminding myself to call the lady after as I always do - 2 to 3 days later - to "follow up." I know I will ask her at the end if we can meet again (and every time I wanted to meet again and popped that question, I got a "yes" and always took them out a 2nd, 3rd, time, etc).

Yet, I thought. DO I seem desperate if I call the very next day? I don't recall ever having done so after a first date.

Women, what's the longest a man is allowed to go between date 1 and follow-up call before you dismiss him as a player, as someone who is not interested, or what not?

(tired... gotta go to bed. can't think straight.)
When I was single and my date and hit it off I would call her in a day or two. In the case of my wife, I met her at church, talked for an hour and afterwards she gave me her phone number. We kissed and said see you soon. I called her two hours later and we talked for hours. The next day I saw her. We are married now almost 14 years. You have to play it by ear.
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Old 04-30-2009, 07:00 AM
 
2,057 posts, read 5,480,508 times
Reputation: 1032
Quote:
Originally Posted by killer2021 View Post
The idea behind the not calling rule is to give the impression that you have other things going for you in life, like school, career, friends so on so forth. If you call right away it gives the impression that you are desperate and you are just sitting around all day doing nothing. Also it gives the impression that you are clingy, that is a female trait. Women are attracted to men who are confident, strong and display leadership qualities. I usually call one week after and that is if she had sex with me, otherwise I don't even bother. I find another girl to go with.

Also good idea to plan it out. When you go on a date, you want to be pushing your agenda not going a long with her agenda. That means if you want to get sex that night, you better plan to end it with, "wanna go back to my place etc." I personally don't like going out to dinner a lot of girls are insecure about eating in front of guys and I personally don't want to be pressured into buying her meal. Too expensive. My favorite first date: Come over to my house to watch a movie.

No point going after women who aren't sexually attracted to you.

haha this is funny but that is exactly what you want her to think. You want her insecure and you want her thinking, "when will he call me? Did I do something wrong? What did he not like about me? etc. When you do call, she'll be shocked and probably very excited that you decided to call. If she asks why, just say you were very busy with a new project at work etc. etc.
So you would only go out with a women a second time if she had sex with you on the first date?

I want to say something to you. But, I will keep it to myself because I dont want to get an infraction

Also, I am a 25 yr old male

Quote:
Originally Posted by Twinkle Toes View Post
Now, if it were me ... I'd probably just tell you to kiss my ass. That is, if I can even be bothered with your phone call.

Last edited by NYC1DAY; 04-30-2009 at 07:11 AM..
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Old 04-30-2009, 07:06 AM
 
3,486 posts, read 5,675,989 times
Reputation: 3868
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sprawling_Homeowner View Post
Women, what's the longest a man is allowed to go between date 1 and follow-up call before you dismiss him as a player, as someone who is not interested, or what not?
There was never any set dismissal time for me, but -- I wouldn't sit around waiting for a follow-up phone call. So the longer a man would take to call me, the greater the chances would be that I already "clicked" with someone else.
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Old 04-30-2009, 07:24 AM
 
43 posts, read 140,791 times
Reputation: 26
It can be stressing for a guy to wait so many days after a date before he calls...it makes the girl think he dosent like her or what did she do wrong. Depending on how you fell the date went call her anytime. Or if you want to feel like you are not pushy call her in 1 or two days.
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Old 04-30-2009, 07:30 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,077 posts, read 14,624,310 times
Reputation: 3784
To be honest, for not even having met yet, there is way too much planning and thinking ahead. This is partly why relationships fail, people get way too ahead of themselves and way to pumped up and then when things don't work out they have a huge let down.
The best thing to do on a first meeting / date, go to a coffee shop, have some tea / coffee together, see how the conversation goes, see if you have any chemistry and see if it's even worth putting together a "real date".
I never understood why people put so much into a first meeting. Yes, true, first impressions are important but you can get a good first impression just as easily at your local coffee shop as your local fine food dining establishment.
When I was single, I never did a traditional first date, by MY choice I would meet at a local starbucks or something similar, where it's relaxed, you can sit and talk. If things went well from there then fine, if not, no big deal.
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Old 04-30-2009, 07:37 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,077 posts, read 14,624,310 times
Reputation: 3784
Quote:
Originally Posted by killer2021 View Post
The idea behind the not calling rule is to give the impression that you have other things going for you in life, like school, career, friends so on so forth. If you call right away it gives the impression that you are desperate and you are just sitting around all day doing nothing. Also it gives the impression that you are clingy, that is a female trait. Women are attracted to men who are confident, strong and display leadership qualities. I usually call one week after and that is if she had sex with me, otherwise I don't even bother. I find another girl to go with.

Also good idea to plan it out. When you go on a date, you want to be pushing your agenda not going a long with her agenda. That means if you want to get sex that night, you better plan to end it with, "wanna go back to my place etc." I personally don't like going out to dinner a lot of girls are insecure about eating in front of guys and I personally don't want to be pressured into buying her meal. Too expensive. My favorite first date: Come over to my house to watch a movie.

No point going after women who aren't sexually attracted to you.



haha this is funny but that is exactly what you want her to think. You want her insecure and you want her thinking, "when will he call me? Did I do something wrong? What did he not like about me? etc. When you do call, she'll be shocked and probably very excited that you decided to call. If she asks why, just say you were very busy with a new project at work etc. etc.

Clearly your age hear speaks volumes. It's because of men (and women) like you who play these ridiculous games that gives the rest of a bad name.

If you are in it just to get a piece of a$$ then you're an idiot and you deserve to end up lonely and you will. If you go on a date and they are putting out on the first date WHY on earth WOULD you want another date? Gross. That means that woman that slept with you that easily did that with every other man she met too, I hope you're using protection!

Next, you are a game player, with the call on this day after so many days and only if she puts out, etc etc.. Dude, are you kidding me? Please tell me in this day and age you are not serious with that attitude?

Look the fact of the matter is people there is NO rule to dating. You meet, you have a good time you meet again, you don't need to wait a certain amount of days before calling, you don't have to do any of that garbage. Just be yourself and if it's meant to be for you to meet someone quality, then you will! If not, then take a good look at yourself and find out what you're doing wrong.
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Old 04-30-2009, 07:38 AM
 
Location: In my view finder.....
8,515 posts, read 16,157,681 times
Reputation: 8079
Oh, I thought you were talking about something else after the first date.......
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