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Old 05-11-2009, 12:34 PM
 
Location: Connecticut
1,461 posts, read 2,789,163 times
Reputation: 1585
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyanosphere View Post
When a I asked a while back about the best way to introduce yourself to a girl, a lot of you said "just say hi."
Well, I have been trying that for the past couple of days, but it hasn't been working.I've been going to my normal spots; the cafe, the bar, the book store, the supermarket. If I saw a girl who was attractive standing in line or walking past me in the opposite direction, I've been trying to be bold by simply saying "hi." Some of them said nothing and just looked confused. Most of them said "hi" back though, some with a smile, but either way, they all just went back to what they were normally doing as if nothing had happened.This is why I said not to tell me to "just say hi;" that I needed something more creative and unique.What comes after "hi?"
Ok....so you want to know what to say after you say hello?? Scenario: You are in the grocery store near the pasta sauce. You see a pretty girl and you smile and say hello, then stand there and look like you can't decide which sauce to choose...ask her what she would recommend. Goes something like this, YOU: "There are so many brands of sauce here I can't decide which one to choose; what do you use" HER: "I use Ragu or whatever is on sale". YOU: "Oh, I have never tried that, is it good?" AND it goes from there.

Scenario #2: You are in the Cafe reading a book and drinking a coffee, you see a pretty girl at the next table so you smile at her and say hi. Then you get up, get another coffee and "accidently" spill a little bit near her..you put your coffee on her table and ask her for a napkin while apologizing all over the place and telling her how clumsy you are at the same time..keep smiling. Then you say, "Hi my name is-------and I am so sorry". "Can I buy you another coffee or would you like to join me for coffee?" Keep babbling and looking apologetic..women love it when a man is falling all over himself...this one worked with me. We both started laughing.

Anyhow, you can't expect any woman to just immediately start to talk with you after you only say hi...you have to have some imagination and take the conversation further after that. Extend your personality out there a little bit, make her laugh, ask for her advice, compliment her...but talk more!!

Last edited by Connecticut Pam; 05-11-2009 at 12:35 PM.. Reason: spelling error
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Old 05-11-2009, 12:38 PM
 
Location: The Plains
5,911 posts, read 4,987,913 times
Reputation: 4144
The trick is to get the lady to say Hi to you first.
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Old 05-11-2009, 02:14 PM
 
Location: Back in the gym...Yo Adrian!
8,860 posts, read 10,847,636 times
Reputation: 16368
Maybe it's your appearance that's putting them off? If you look like Charles Manson or The Nutty Professor, then I can see where "Hi" just wouldn't cut it. I'm not saying you have to look like a GQ model, but is your wardrobe up to date (no highwaters or white socks with black shoes), do you practice good hygiene (clean fingernails, hair, clothes etc.), do you speak too loud or too soft? It's difficult the tell where you are going wrong without a physical and verbal face to face. On the flip side, you can look like Johnny Depp or George Clooney but if you come off like you're boring or insecure they'll pick up on it and be equally uninterested. Saying hi is a good start because predatory behavior is so transparent, so you don't want to seem too desperate with suave flirting and cheesy pick up lines, unless you are intentionally trying to make them laugh. Talk to them as you would a friend you've known for years. Relax and just be yourself.
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Old 05-11-2009, 02:44 PM
 
11,001 posts, read 6,938,722 times
Reputation: 8239
I thought pad thai was a perfume. . LOL. I think its a food.
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Old 05-11-2009, 02:45 PM
 
1,567 posts, read 705,369 times
Reputation: 461
Default "Just say hi" isn't working

Well are you adding, "How are you," after saying, "hi"?

If not, say that and they won't be thinking of you as a freak.
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Old 05-11-2009, 03:24 PM
 
Location: Portland, OR.
493 posts, read 158,033 times
Reputation: 180
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyanosphere View Post
When a I asked a while back about the best way to introduce yourself to a girl, a lot of you said "just say hi."

Well, I have been trying that for the past couple of days, but it hasn't been working.

I've been going to my normal spots; the cafe, the bar, the book store, the supermarket. If I saw a girl who was attractive standing in line or walking past me in the opposite direction, I've been trying to be bold by simply saying "hi."

Some of them said nothing and just looked confused. Most of them said "hi" back though, some with a smile, but either way, they all just went back to what they were normally doing as if nothing had happened.

This is why I said not to tell me to "just say hi;" that I needed something more creative and unique.

What comes after "hi?"
Well when you hear people saying "you should just go up and say hi" regarding how you approach a woman you don't know, you can literally say "hi" if you want to, but you need to follow up fast with something else that will get her talking. A question, a compliment/question, a funny observation about something, whatever. Women just kind of have it (relatively) easy in this stage of the game, since they are not generally expected to make a first move. They get to sit back and look smug while you either sink or swim. The good news? That's the most intimidating part of the relationship you'll ever have with that person, whether she tells you to get lost, or you end up marrying the woman.
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Old 05-11-2009, 03:28 PM
 
25,170 posts, read 33,520,431 times
Reputation: 6690
I agree with this. You always say Hi how are you? With a smile like this

Quote:
Originally Posted by 60-minutes-II View Post
Well are you adding, "How are you," after saying, "hi"?

If not, say that and they won't be thinking of you as a freak.
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Old 05-11-2009, 03:34 PM
 
Location: CITY OF ANGELS AND CONSTANT DANGER
5,404 posts, read 7,779,416 times
Reputation: 2166
game: you either have it or you dont.

be natural about your conversation. dont be creepy.

and dont take the advice about sexual comments. that will make you look like a creep.
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Old 05-11-2009, 03:37 PM
 
25,170 posts, read 33,520,431 times
Reputation: 6690
It depends how you look. There are tons of guys that are very unattractive and will come across as creepy no matter how suave and polite they are.

Quote:
Originally Posted by the one View Post
game: you either have it or you dont.

be natural about your conversation. dont be creepy.

and dont take the advice about sexual comments. that will make you look like a creep.
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Old 05-11-2009, 04:03 PM
 
Location: Wherever women are
19,023 posts, read 13,779,228 times
Reputation: 11309
Quote:
Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
It depends how you look. There are tons of guys that are very unattractive and will come across as creepy no matter how suave and polite they are.
In the world of artsy, unattractive guys are creepy.
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