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Old 05-15-2009, 03:50 PM
 
943 posts, read 1,763,088 times
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Default Anyone in a good marriage but are very attracted to someone else?

Many of my female friends tell me that they are in very happy marriages but on occasion run into or befriend someone of the opposite sex who they take a real liking to. I think it is human nature to just be very attracted to people regardless of our marital status.

One of my friends has been telling me how she is so attracted to one of her neighbors. She is a stay at home Mom and the man works evenings so he is home alot during the day working outside. She tells me that she has made a special effort to be outside so they can talk. Nothing has happened but there is an attraction and she is thinking about him alot. She says she loves her husband but she really likes him. No sexual attraction but a real chemistry.

Could you imagine yourself being attracted to someone from the opposite sex and thinking about them often, and still having a good marriage? Or if you are attracted to someone else does this show that you have a poor marriage but just do to know it?
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Old 05-15-2009, 03:52 PM
 
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Yes, I've seen that happen to many married couples. Is it a good "trend"? No.

Sounds like your stay at home friend is playing w/ huge fire, since the guy also has time to hang out w/ her (since he works nights). Next time, I wouldn't be surprised if they try to start hooky on the side, with "oh so much daytime time" in their hands.
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Old 05-15-2009, 04:08 PM
 
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Im no relationhsip counselor but id say this can only end badly..

If youre in a healthy realtionship theres no reason for you to try to get a "chemistry" going with another man and wait outside just so u can talk to him..

Its unhealty as hell i sugeest she either stop this and try to communicate more with her husband and find out why shes feels thsi way or get a divorce otherwise youre beign really unfair to your husband
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Old 05-15-2009, 04:14 PM
Status: "soft lips are open. them knuckles are pale" (set 23 days ago)
 
Location: Texas
4,541 posts, read 3,564,145 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Weekend Traveler View Post
Many of my female friends tell me that they are in very happy marriages but on occasion run into or befriend someone of the opposite sex who they take a real liking to. I think it is human nature to just be very attracted to people regardless of our marital status.

One of my friends has been telling me how she is so attracted to one of her neighbors. She is a stay at home Mom and the man works evenings so he is home alot during the day working outside. She tells me that she has made a special effort to be outside so they can talk. Nothing has happened but there is an attraction and she is thinking about him alot. She says she loves her husband but she really likes him. No sexual attraction but a real chemistry.

Could you imagine yourself being attracted to someone from the opposite sex and thinking about them often, and still having a good marriage? Or if you are attracted to someone else does this show that you have a poor marriage but just do to know it?
making special efforts to see the neighbor outside isn't a good thing. imagine her husband taking his secretary out to lunch everyday and getting all chummy. wonder how that would make his wife feel?
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Old 05-15-2009, 04:21 PM
 
Location: Southern California
2,890 posts, read 4,189,945 times
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She's going down a risky path. If she's smart & truly loves & respects her husband, she will AVOID the attractive neighbor. Cheating starts in the mind....she shouldn't even entertain those thoughts, IMO.
Of course we all see other attractive people even if we're in a relationship, but nip it in the bud...don't feed the attraction & allow feelings to grow.
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Old 05-15-2009, 04:27 PM
 
2,333 posts, read 2,239,654 times
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And lets say she leaves her husband for this guy its qutie obvious whenever shes attracted to somebody else shell wander

Maybe shes just a **** who has be with anyone she finds attractive..
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Old 05-15-2009, 04:53 PM
 
168 posts, read 328,386 times
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Just because you're married doesn't mean you're dead. I think every married person has felt attracted to someone else at least once in their marriage. Having those occasional attractions is not the problem, it's what you do with those feelings that counts. Do you make every effort to keep away from that person or like your friend, do you make an effort to fan the flames? That's the real question.
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Old 05-15-2009, 05:26 PM
 
Location: So Cal
23,141 posts, read 16,722,325 times
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Nope, never happens, never see attractive women at all, I don't have eyes for other women. I never notice those sexy half dressed women that So Cal is so notorious for.

I surgically had my eyed altered so that attractive women appear to be invisible to me.

Shall I continue.....
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Old 05-15-2009, 07:42 PM
 
2,333 posts, read 2,239,654 times
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Not to stick up for this women because its scumbgish what shes doign frankly but this goes to the point i always had that theres really no soulmate or one true love in that i beleive most people married have great chemistry and foudn each other at the right time BUT theres probably hundreds of people allot of us could have married if we would have met that person at some point in our life..

Last edited by JBT1980; 05-15-2009 at 07:55 PM..
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Old 05-15-2009, 07:52 PM
FBJ
 
32,732 posts, read 20,971,395 times
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Marriage is overrated
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