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Old 06-06-2009, 08:00 PM
 
Location: VA soon to be ABQ
14 posts, read 39,023 times
Reputation: 20

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Why is it that men shy away from women with kids?

Say if you are browsing a dating site or a social networking community and see a woman that you are attracted to but also find out that she has a child(ren) you click on and keep going?

That is judging the book by it's cover without discovering what's behind it.

All single mothers do not carry baggage and are quite independent.
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Old 06-06-2009, 08:04 PM
 
544 posts, read 920,215 times
Reputation: 240
Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkPumps View Post
Why is it that men shy away from women with kids?

Say if you are browsing a dating site or a social networking community and see a woman that you are attracted to but also find out that she has a child(ren) you click on and keep going?

That is judging the book by it's cover without discovering what's behind it.

All single mothers do not carry baggage and are quite independent.
kida are baggage i'm not saying that's a bad thing but it's realistic. when i was dating my so there were times we couldnt' go out of town for the weekend because she didnt have a sitter or she cancelled at the last minute because her daughter was sick. it depends on the woman though when we were dating i dated her not her and her kid a lot of women dont do that. she was also financially stable on her own so i wasnt worried about that aspect but for every child there are two parents and i just lucked out that while her daughters father is extrenely immature she doesnt entertain it. ive seen some great relationships ruined because one of them entertained drama from someone outside of the relationship. save that for your griflriends.
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Old 06-06-2009, 08:23 PM
 
930 posts, read 2,125,224 times
Reputation: 1000
Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkPumps View Post
Why is it that men shy away from women with kids?
Not even remotely true. Guys with no kids will date and sleep with single moms all day long and twice on Sundays.

Marry them? No.
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Old 06-06-2009, 08:27 PM
 
Location: VA soon to be ABQ
14 posts, read 39,023 times
Reputation: 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beena View Post
Not even remotely true. Guys with no kids will date and sleep with single moms all day long and twice on Sundays.

Marry them? No.
That was my point, oppose to being an object for just sexual pleasure...why not try and build something serious, marriage?
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Old 06-06-2009, 08:43 PM
 
3,071 posts, read 7,591,271 times
Reputation: 2057
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beena View Post
Not even remotely true. Guys with no kids will date and sleep with single moms all day long and twice on Sundays.

Marry them? No.

I had one friend who loved women with kids. His theory was "you already knew they were f***ing." On top of that, they stay couped up so much when they get a chance to go out, they go all out.


My wife had already had my daughter when I met her. So there are guys out there.
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Old 06-06-2009, 08:50 PM
 
Location: Delaware...Oi
1,293 posts, read 2,849,036 times
Reputation: 535
Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkPumps View Post
Why is it that men shy away from women with kids?

Say if you are browsing a dating site or a social networking community and see a woman that you are attracted to but also find out that she has a child(ren) you click on and keep going?

That is judging the book by it's cover without discovering what's behind it.

All single mothers do not carry baggage and are quite independent.

It's baggage. She chose to have that child, or children with someone else. Why should it be disappointing or shocking that a man without them would want his own and/or be with somone on equal footing at the start of a relationship?
It's not like skipping over someone due to them having a mole, it's reading a chapter and not liking the start of the book, not the whole book of course, but it's hardly shallow so long as your honest about it.
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Old 06-06-2009, 10:04 PM
 
23,989 posts, read 31,234,904 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkPumps View Post
All single mothers do not carry baggage
EVERYONE carries baggage. Some is simply heavier than others.
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Old 06-06-2009, 10:09 PM
 
Location: US
1,189 posts, read 3,557,819 times
Reputation: 803
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
EVERYONE carries baggage. Some is simply heavier than others.
Yeah, about 40lbs give or take.

But hey, if you are attractive someone is bound to jump at the opportunity eventually.
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Old 06-06-2009, 10:11 PM
 
Location: Wyoming
9,186 posts, read 16,583,909 times
Reputation: 13421
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
EVERYONE carries baggage. Some is simply heavier than others.
Let me hear an AMEN! And as baggage goes, children are pretty darned heavy.
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Old 06-06-2009, 10:43 PM
 
422 posts, read 2,180,196 times
Reputation: 515
Let me see if I understand this correctly, the other guy gets to have sex with the girl and I get stuck raising the child? Time for me to vent alittle and listen up because I'm a perfect example of why I don't date women with children. Let's see where to start, oh yea, let's start in high school. Gee you remember those days right, when everyone belonged to a certain crowd, the popular crowd, the geeks, the losers, etc..... Well I wasn't part of any one crowd, played sports, took all the college prep classes, did rather well but never dated in high school, no one wanted to date me, heck didn't even go to my prom because I couldn't get a date. Put myself thru 6 years of the US Air Force, came out, put myself thru undergrad and then put myself thru graduate school (dentistry) for another 4 years plus one year of residency. So I come back to the same area I grew up in and wouldn't you know, I run into some of the same women I use to go to high school with. Now these women are all single, have one or two children and are uneducated. These are the same women that wouldn't give me the time of day back in high school because I was sort of a geek, didn't hang out with the cool guys, didn't smoke weed, didn't drink beer with everyone else down by the river on a friday night, instead actually went to work on the weekends and saved up alittle money. You know the type right? Well well, times have certainly changed haven't they? Now those so-called 'snobs' who wouldn't give me the time are single mommies without a job or working a low paying job, father is no where to be found, doesn't pay child support and looky looky here, drsmiley is all of a sudden good looking to these women, what a freakin surprise dumbass! What happened sweetheart, what happened the cool guy with the nice car, didn't he stick around after he knocked you up? Aww that's ashame, he took off you on, bummer, sorry to hear that. Oh and you didn't go to college and you work a deadend job just to pay for rent and food, ouch! So somehow after alittle over 10 years of working my ass off to get to where I'm out in life, I'm suppose to just throw that all the way? I'm single, never married, no children and no crazy ex-girlfriends either. You're telling me that I'm suppose to thru my graduate education that cost me well over $100K away on some girl with 2 children? Funny, I bet if that same girl was single with no children she wouldn't give me the time of day, funny how when you back is up against the wall your mindset changes doesn't it? Gee you're 35 years old, never married, no children and single, how did you manage to pull that one off? It's called hard work sweetheart and staying out trouble, but I guess you missed that boat when it left port didn't you. Oh my god I could go on all night! My point is this, do you honestly thing I would want to deal with custody weekends? You think I'm going to deal with some crazy ex-boyfriend or ex-husband always coming around wondering who this guy is that's messing around with his 'girl'? Yea, if you wouldn't played your cards right sweetheart and stuck it out and stayed out of trouble you couldn't be married to a dentist with a nice house and big yard with a BMW in the driveway, bummer it didn't turn out that way though. I'm not saying all single moms are this way, but the majority of single moms have turned out this way. I went to grad school with a few single moms that were very hard working and didn't need to rely on someone else for help and I commend them. But don't kid yourself, if you think for one nanosecond I'll give up my education and training to be with some girl who has 1 or 2 kids with no education and can barely hold on to a job, you're out of your vulcan mind! Can't wait to hear the hatemail on this post, this ought to be fun to read later next week.
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