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NO ONE is saying that being fat is OK. But to abuse people over it ISN'T OK. Many overweight people are depressed and they need HELP, not just with their weight but with the cause of the depression.
And, yes, teen girls DO read those magazines and emulate the supermodels. Uh, hello, they're looking at the mags to wear the latest fashions, and those fashions lend themselves best to a supermodel figure. I taught at various high schools and saw firsthand the problems with teenage girls throwing up their meals after lunch to stay thin and passing out in PE class and in the hallways because they don't eat enough. If I have an "attitude," it's because I saw far too many young women who would do anything, including jeopardizing their health, to conform to an unrealistic body image.
As for mocking me (and others) who have thyroid problems, well, that's the lowest of the low. I have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis as it commonly occurs with a disease that I have called Systemic Lupus Erythematosus. And, for your information, the first symptom I had was NOT weight gain but a large inflammation of my thyroid gland. Thyroid disease is a serious problem and it is often hereditary in women. In fact, my mother had thyroiditis and had to have part of her thyroid removed because of benign tumors.
So, you can disparage thyroid disease as a cause for metabolism problems and weight gain in women but the fact remains that it is common in women and they need to be tested for it. Thyroid dysfunction can lead to serious heart problems and other diseases but it can easily be treated. I hope that women DO get tested for it if they have the symptoms and not listen to fools who tell them that they simply have to go on a diet.
I have a heart disease that doctor just disagnosed me with, that get this, is from having hypothyroidism undiagnosed too long. Well I would go to doctors, I am gaining weight and they would ignore me telling me to diet even though all my hair was falling out.
I want to know why my sistert can become anorexic, with hyperthyroidism, and thats not her fault, but when someone gains weight with thyroid it is their fault. I dont believe thsoe books that say people only gain 10lbs, that is BS. I lost weight after going on thyroid but now they say my body is not absorping the thyroid hormone like it should. Thyroid problems are just one thing I deal with, I have two other conditions that affect the weight most people never have heard of but people go undiagnosed for long times becaujse of weight prejudice.
Your anecdotal experience is not the whole picture. The whole picture is that more people are obese than underweight, and anorexia and bulimia are not nearly the epidemic that obesity is.
The bottom line is, people make EXCUSES for their weight. Maybe it is hard in this culture to lose weight, but it's not impossible, and change starts with the individual rejecting the harmful "norm".
If you want to go by personal experience, then I will say that every individual I have ever seen who eats healthy & gets regular exercise gets to & stays within a healthy weight. Losing weight actually HELPS many of the diseases associated with being overweight, such as diabetes.
I don't know where this abuse of fat people thing is coming from. Seems like a derail from the point to me. Who said anything about it being okay to abuse anyone? Not me. You seem to think it's okay to abuse thin women by your comments. How do you justify that?
No, few teen girls are interested in haute couture. I maintain that they read fashion mags aimed at teens, and for the most part, the thin models still look healthy in those. The ideal will never be attainable or realistic for most. That's why it's ideal and not average. I don't hear anyone complaining of how images of busty women have made the number of women getting breast augmentation go through the roof. The health risks associated with that are REAL also.
Basically, setting a new ideal of fat is not helping anyone out. Insulting thin women is not helping anyone out.
I already know all about Hashimoto's disease. I don't need you to educate me on anything, and I was in no way mocking anything except the constant stream of excuses people have for being fat. Nice way to derail from the point again though.
Come on you think 60% of the american population are just lazy irresponsible ingrates? and its everyone's fault?
No one wants to be fat, it SUCKS. take it from a fat person, that pain and health problems are real and those SUCK too.
Ive been nutritionists they say I eat healthy, and I am actually adjusting the diet now, even, lowering meat, more raw foods. Not everyone can exercise either: I am just getting help right now for endurance exercies and more but i wanted this help 10 years ago.
I think the whole american lifestyle is unhealthy as hell, and there is going to need to be REAL adjustments, but if they keep up the sell diets and put everyone down crap that is already FAILING, [course I guess that is where the money is] NOTHING REALLY iS GOING TO CHANGE FOR THE BETTER.
I have a heart disease that doctor just disagnosed me with, that get this, is from having hypothyroidism undiagnosed too long. Well I would go to doctors, I am gaining weight and they would ignore me telling me to diet even though all my hair was falling out.
I want to know why my sistert can become anorexic, with hyperthyroidism, and thats not her fault, but when someone gains weight with thyroid it is their fault. I dont believe thsoe books that say people only gain 10lbs, that is BS. I lost weight after going on thyroid but now they say my body is not absorping the thyroid hormone like it should. Thyroid problems are just one thing I deal with, I have two other conditions that affect the weight most people never have heard of but people go undiagnosed for long times becaujse of weight prejudice.
Maybe it's because of where you lived when you were seeking help but around here when people complain of gaining weight and fatigue they automatically test for hypothyroidism to rule it out. Being overweight is a much more complex issue than simply having the willpower not to overeat. Many times overeating is definitely in response to depression which worsens due to the resultant weight gain, and is often due to other undiagnosed psychiatic conditions such as anxiety, depression, ADHD and bipolar disorder. People use it like medication because of that initial feel-good response but it makes them worse in the long run because of the weight gain.
There is a certain mean-spirited tone to this conversation that, in the spirit of respectful conversation, should be dialed back some.
Another observation from me, as far as the hundreds of people that I know personally: while being skinnier guarantees more attention from men, I have not noticed that dating translating into healthier relationships with the opposite sex. In fact, I've seen the opposite: most of my bigger girlfriends are happily partnered and/or married, while most of my skinnier girlfriends with model-type looks are still very, very single. I have a lot of theories as to why this phenomenon exists, and here they are:
(a) Certain types of men are attracted to pretty & skinny women, but are not likely to marry these ladies or even to treat them well. The lives of my model-looking friends are riddled with the damage done by these types of men, who tend to be controlling, abusive, and generally downright mean. Nearly all of my skinnier girlfriends have an abuse story. It's pretty sad, really. That leads to ...
(b) There is a naturally occurring vetting process going on here, wherein girls who are thicker appear to get less attention overall, but seem to have stronger relationships once they do find a mate. I don't know why, but most of my bigger girlfriends are married with kids; I think that guys who go after plumper ladies tend to be the settling-down type. That is the kind of guy that most women want, I think ... and that guy seems to be attracted to down-to-earth women with a little meat on their bones. Therefore ...
(c) While skinnier women get more attention overall, a lot of that attention is from men who are not necessarily desirable mates. That means that the pool of available men is larger for skinnier women, but fraught with more varied types of men ... some of whom are of, IMO, a very lacking quality.
Whenever the weight issue pops up on the internet, it tends to be a highly gendered (i.e., all about the ladies) and sore debate. But what does not come up often is this: is there a certain disincentive to being really skinny? If larger women seem to attract men who have greater tolerance for "deviant" outer appearances, and skinnier women seem to attract men who get off on being controlling, who is really getting the better end of the deal here?
There is a certain mean-spirited tone to this conversation that, in the spirit of respectful conversation, should be dialed back some.
Another observation from me, as far as the hundreds of people that I know personally: while being skinnier guarantees more attention from men, I have not noticed that dating translating into healthier relationships with the opposite sex. In fact, I've seen the opposite: most of my bigger girlfriends are happily partnered and/or married, while most of my skinnier girlfriends with model-type looks are still very, very single. I have a lot of theories as to why this phenomenon exists, and here they are:
(a) Certain types of men are attracted to pretty & skinny women, but are not likely to marry these ladies or even to treat them well. The lives of my model-looking friends are riddled with the damage done by these types of men, who tend to be controlling, abusive, and generally downright mean. Nearly all of my skinnier girlfriends have an abuse story. It's pretty sad, really. That leads to ...
(b) There is a naturally occurring vetting process going on here, wherein girls who are thicker appear to get less attention overall, but seem to have stronger relationships once they do find a mate. I don't know why, but most of my bigger girlfriends are married with kids; I think that guys who go after plumper ladies tend to be the settling-down type. That is the kind of guy that most women want, I think ... and that guy seems to be attracted to down-to-earth women with a little meat on their bones. Therefore ...
(c) While skinnier women get more attention overall, a lot of that attention is from men who are not necessarily desirable mates. That means that the pool of available men is larger for skinnier women, but fraught with more varied types of men ... some of whom are of, IMO, a very lacking quality.
Whenever the weight issue pops up on the internet, it tends to be a highly gendered (i.e., all about the ladies) and sore debate. But what does not come up often is this: is there a certain disincentive to being really skinny? If larger women seem to attract men who have greater tolerance for "deviant" outer appearances, and skinnier women seem to attract men who get off on being controlling, who is really getting the better end of the deal here?
And why have we not discussed that?
If your hypothesis is correct, it would appear that thinner, more attractive women have more options, while heavier, less attractive women have fewer.
This is essentially the quality vs. quantity debate.
That is, skinnier pretty women have more options, but more of those options are dicey (at best).
Though a larger woman may have fewer options overall, the quality of those options appears to be markedly higher.
I'm not sure about the soundness of your "get married and stay married = higher quality" equation.
Maybe heavy women get married and stay married because they try harder to do so; because they know they have fewer options, they work harder at it.
As for your "thinner, more attractive women are more likely to be in an abusive relationship" theory, that sounds purely anecdotal and not at all representative of anything factual or concrete.
In my experience, the opposite is true: the heavier, less attractive women I've known are willing to tolerate a lot more crap, because they've got fewer options.
But I doubt that's representative of anything, either.
I'm sure women of all sizes and shapes are abused; it's partly bad luck, partly lack of alternatives and resources, partly low-self esteem... and none of these have anything to do with weight or appearance.
Statistically, poorer women tend to be abused in relationships more frequently than more affluent women (again, that 'lack of options and resources' factor); statistically, poorer women also tend to be more overweight than more affluent women.
So, if you conducted an empirical study, it stands to reason that you'd find heavier women suffering spousal abuse more often than thinner women.
But that finding wouldn't mean anything, because correlation doesn't equal causation. These women are not abused because they're fat, they're abused because they're poor, and they're also fat because they're poor.
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