Do men appreciate traditional good wives today? (long distance, attractive, advice)
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My idea of being a "traditional good wife" was being the head of household, educating and raising children who are wise and well-rounded, being the strong, compassionate and affectionate half of the disciplinarian and hunting husband, or vice versa if necessary. What makes you think a good wife has to be the ignorant and docile subordinate to her husband? The best marriages are when wife and husband walk throughout life side-by-side, not one behind or in front of the other.
Is the OP suggesting a division of labor or a mail order bride? If a women likes cooking and keeping a house cleaned then great. But what is the OP bringing to the table besides working 9-5 and coming home to sit on his ass? He better be out doing yard work, fixing the car and repairing stuff around the house.
Someone has to be the chief, the other has to be the Indian.
Says who?
Seriously. There is no law stating that.
Some will probably start quoting the bible to me, but as I'm an atheist, that means nothing to me.
So, I'd like to know who decided that someone has be be dominant and someone has to be submissive, and someone has to be the leader and someone has to be the follower, in a marriage or relationship. I'd like to know who decided a marriage or relationship can't be one of equals.
Traditional gender roles and being submissive are two totally different subjects to me.
If I were submissive, my SO would probably have no interest in me at all.
I enjoy doing some of the traditional things. I LIKE cooking and cleaning and all that domestic diva stuff for my man. BUT, if he were to tell me that was my JOB, he would be explaining it to my backside as I went out the door.
But at the end of the day, we've both worked, we've both gone to the gym or whatever, I'm not in the kitchen cooking and washing up by myself, it's late were both tired, we both contribute.
I sure as hell wouldn't be around if some guy were telling me "listen, I'm the Chief, YOUR the indian....". Having a penis doesn't make you my boss. If it does, we can fix that.....
I would say having a home-cooked meal waiting for hubby nearly every night has garnered me a LOT of good will, points and IOUs from my SO. I keep the house, lug the kids around, make sure they have what they need and are where they are supposed to be. I don't do his laundry. I can spend/do whatever I like.
Ditto. I love your response. It baffles me that some women think that submissive equals doormat, when that's so far from the truth. A woman that's submissive understands/respects the man's role as the head of the home and isn't afraid to fall back and let him take the reigns. Let me break it down like this: Most relationships have too many chiefs and not enough indians. Some women are too strong for their own good that they must challenge their man on every little thing, which is a major turnoff. Someone has to be the chief, the other has to be the Indian. I'm very traditional in that regard and if that makes me insecure, so be it. A real woman lets the man take the reigns and lead in a way that's beneficial to her and the family, if children are involved.
What I think is going on is the woman doesn't have enough confidence in herself to allow someone else to "take the reigns."
When you trust someone...you trust them. You know whatever it is they decide it is going to benefit you and the rest of the family.
To go grab the wheel of the car while he is driving can be dangerous.
Some will probably start quoting the bible to me, but as I'm an atheist, that means nothing to me.
So, I'd like to know who decided that someone has be be dominant and someone has to be submissive, and someone has to be the leader and someone has to be the follower, in a marriage or relationship. I'd like to know who decided a marriage or relationship can't be one of equals.
There is no law if you are an atheist.
However, there is only ONE steering wheel in a car. One of you has to yield to the other at that point. Someone has to drive. So...who is it? Would you like him to drive you around? Would you like to have him in the backseat?
See, someone has to take the lead at that point. You cannot drive the car once he took the driver's seat. You are submitting to his driving. Yeah, you can nag all you want as to how he is doing the leading but it's not going to help the ride much.
Just alittle illustration for you to understand what submitting to another person is.
I mean,wives are submissive,take all the houseworks,always husband and kid first, don't spend money on herself.
It seems to me that woman who like to spend money on herself,who argue with her husband,who share the houseworks with her husband(even if she doesn't work full-time) more likely get a better husband.
Which one could better describe men's instinct, protecting women or conquering women?
Some do, some don't. I do think you're right about women who will stand up for themselves getting better husbands. It makes sense that if a woman won't stand up for herself, she's likely to get walked on. Some men like that. They want a woman who will do what he tells her to do. Other men want an equal partner.
However, there is only ONE steering wheel in a car. One of you has to yield to the other at that point. Someone has to drive. So...who is it? Would you like him to drive you around? Would you like to have him in the backseat?
See, someone has to take the lead at that point. You cannot drive the car once he took the driver's seat. You are submitting to his driving. Yeah, you can nag all you want as to how he is doing the leading but it's not going to help the ride much.
Just alittle illustration for you to understand what submitting to another person is.
My grandmother used to say that marriage is not a 50/50 proposition, it's a 100/100 proposition. At any given time, one person yeilds so the other can have what they want. Balance comes in when both take turns doing so.
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