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Old 07-06-2009, 04:50 PM
 
615 posts, read 1,323,054 times
Reputation: 241
Quote:
Originally Posted by pdrx911 View Post
Dating someone for a year now with a bratty 7 year old. I wasn't introduced to the child until about 6 months ago. Things are great, but it seems we both get frustrated on the days he is over. It is now time to make a decision about us moving in together and I am not sure what to do. I feel terrible pointing out things in his parenting all the time, but he seems to take it pretty well most of the time. Unfortunately, I deal with children all the time and have a lot of child development background, so sometimes I feel like I open my mouth too much in certain situations. He knows there is a problem but doesn't seem to know what to do about it and often asks for suggestions. Need advice please!
Move on...let him raise his kid. Dating/marrying someone w kids is a total nightmare. Some ppl marry and bring children from previous relationships in and expect things to work...NEVER!
There`s so much more to life than having children, let alone raising someone elses...RUN AND ENJOY YOUR FREEDOM!!!

Last edited by flo2900; 07-06-2009 at 05:07 PM..
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Old 07-06-2009, 05:15 PM
 
Location: Texas
447 posts, read 1,155,939 times
Reputation: 194
Quote:
Originally Posted by EasilyAmused View Post
You haven't been around may teenagers have you?

Well said!! So glad mine are past teenage angst!
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Old 07-06-2009, 05:53 PM
 
Location: Houston
3,567 posts, read 1,380,224 times
Reputation: 931
Quote:
Originally Posted by EasilyAmused View Post
You haven't been around may teenagers have you?

Yes...I have. But the child is not gonna be a brat forever. Sooner or later she will realize what's going on... just 7 yo.
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Old 07-06-2009, 06:01 PM
 
Location: Houston (Memorial) and Western NC
8,801 posts, read 14,376,492 times
Reputation: 3935
Quote:
Originally Posted by XodoX View Post
Yes...I have. But the child is not gonna be a brat forever. Sooner or later she will realize what's going on

Yes, at 25.
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Old 07-06-2009, 07:29 PM
 
1,937 posts, read 2,839,290 times
Reputation: 1116
Quote:
Originally Posted by flo2900 View Post
Move on...let him raise his kid. Dating/marrying someone w kids is a total nightmare. Some ppl marry and bring children from previous relationships in and expect things to work...NEVER!
There`s so much more to life than having children, let alone raising someone elses...RUN AND ENJOY YOUR FREEDOM!!!
THis was not the case for our family. I love my stepchild and I would like to think my stepchild feels the same about me!
It was not easy but respecting the child is what it is all about, I always thought about the child whenever situations arose, and put myself in the childs shoes. I believe that makes a world of difference.
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Old 07-06-2009, 07:43 PM
 
Location: Texas
447 posts, read 1,155,939 times
Reputation: 194
Quote:
Originally Posted by EasilyAmused View Post
Yes, at 25.
LOL!!! So true. (well, hopefully at 25- we're still waiting on one)
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Old 07-06-2009, 08:12 PM
 
1,937 posts, read 2,839,290 times
Reputation: 1116
Quote:
Originally Posted by EM1956 View Post
LOL!!! So true. (well, hopefully at 25- we're still waiting on one)

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Old 07-06-2009, 08:16 PM
 
Location: southern california
47,957 posts, read 43,402,587 times
Reputation: 38730
the strategy in getting you to move in is to make her problems yours.
dont do it.
throw a life preserver be helpful supportive and generous & kind, but dont jump in the water she will push you under and you will drown.

Last edited by Huckleberry3911948; 07-06-2009 at 09:42 PM..
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Old 07-07-2009, 07:04 AM
 
98 posts, read 205,777 times
Reputation: 43
while I might put it more delicately, rb4browns is SO right on the money. My thoughts exactly!
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Old 07-20-2009, 09:14 AM
 
Location: Houston area
14 posts, read 18,856 times
Reputation: 23
WOW! This is not the feed I expected, the posts so far have been nothing more than an argument between two people who believe differently. Yes, he is 7 years old, and developmentally he is at an egocentric stage of his life, HE being the center of HIS world. Yes, he is going through some changes but in my opinion, it is better than when his parents were together. Parents who stick together "for the child's sake" does absolutely NOTHING but teach a child that you should stay in a loveless marriage and be miserable. His mother is seeing someone else as well, and personally, she is the lowest quality mother a child could have unless you think abandoning your child to your parents to go out and party is parenting.

The bratty behavior has been a result of YEARS of spoiling, inconsistent parenting, and undefined limits for the child. What we do here is under our control, however, what the ex does is NOT. There has been times when the child doesn't get his way, and he throws a fit and starts crying and threatening to go to his mom's house. My bf use to give in a lot once the tears start rolling, but he has been getting better by staying firm on his decision and reaffirming his reasoning. However, it doesn't work with his mom.
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