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Old 07-10-2009, 06:33 AM
 
Location: James Island, SC
1,628 posts, read 2,306,818 times
Reputation: 920
Quote:
Originally Posted by Braunwyn View Post
Why?
For the last time, because the legal repurcussions are different.

Enjoy your fuzzy happy bubble where concrete information matters not a whit.
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Old 07-10-2009, 06:48 AM
 
18,979 posts, read 11,128,993 times
Reputation: 13049
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mearth View Post
For the last time, because the legal repurcussions are different.

Enjoy your fuzzy happy bubble where concrete information matters not a whit.
Again, I fail to see what it has to do with the OP being "screwed" or otherwise given the request made in the OP. What's funny is that no concrete information has been offered, only lame assumptions. But, I will agree that I do live in relatively happy bubble, compared to many on this forum.
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Old 07-10-2009, 06:49 AM
 
18,979 posts, read 11,128,993 times
Reputation: 13049
I'm also sure this concrete information is right up there with me "probably being a lesbian". lol
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Old 07-10-2009, 07:03 AM
 
7,042 posts, read 5,460,755 times
Reputation: 6129
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mearth View Post
I feel like that spanish speaking mouse cartoon where he says something funy and all the mice around him are laughing except for him cause he doesn't get it.

Are you being naughty?
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Old 07-10-2009, 07:47 AM
 
18,979 posts, read 11,128,993 times
Reputation: 13049
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mearth View Post
For the last time, because the legal repurcussions are different.

Enjoy your fuzzy happy bubble where concrete information matters not a whit.
Lets look at some concrete information. This varies by state, of course, so none of this is set in stone. But, I've been looking at a few articles, for example, this quote hits at the heart of the issue.

""I think men are chided for not making money and women are not. It's not even brought up if a woman in court says she is not working. Where if it is a man, it's brought up, says Chemtob. "The law is equal, but... the mentality isn't."
Some ex-wives have to pay 'manimony' - CNN.com

This article notes cases where men indeed collect alimony. But, by and large, most men don't ask for it. Although, we are approaching gender eqaulity when it comes to paying out.

"Jeffrey Leving, an Illinois divorce lawyer and author of the book "Fathers' Rights" attributes a rising trend in women paying spousal support in part to an increased number of fathers serving as primary caregivers.
"I also think that there are more men wanting to function as the sole parent and raise children than ever before," says Leving. "It's becoming more socially acceptable for men to be primary parents."

The fact of the matter is that men were not generally the primary caregivers to children post divorce in years past. My personal experience does speak to this. My father wasn't my primary caregiver following his divorce, nor was he interested in doing so. I dated a man for 4 years that had a child and he wasn't interested in raising his daughter as a single parent. He didn't want the responsibility. Although, he paid his $300/mo without fault. But, this is changing. The bolded notes a charge to previous sexist attitudes and to say these attitudes fall on the shoulders of women alone doesn't make sense.

With that said, I don't think an attitude that men or women go into marriage for a monetary boon is productive or accurate. Sure, there are people that do, but if someone is going to make the claim that this is the case for most people, than I'd like to see some data backing that up. I say this due to the comments of "most and many", which I take issue with. And I'll reiterate that those who assume the worst do so because of their experiences in life, hence it has more to do with them than those they're charging. As this thread highlights all too well.
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Old 07-10-2009, 03:41 PM
 
Location: James Island, SC
1,628 posts, read 2,306,818 times
Reputation: 920
Quote:
Originally Posted by funymann View Post
I feel like that spanish speaking mouse cartoon where he says something funy and all the mice around him are laughing except for him cause he doesn't get it.

Are you being naughty?

Sorry, I thought you knew - your "Bro" is a chick
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Old 07-10-2009, 03:46 PM
 
Location: James Island, SC
1,628 posts, read 2,306,818 times
Reputation: 920
Quote:
Originally Posted by Braunwyn View Post
Lets look at some concrete information.
We have all along been speaking of the laws on the books, not the cultural trends nor political correctness of them.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Braunwyn View Post
With that said, I don't think an attitude that men or women go into marriage for a monetary boon is productive or accurate. Sure, there are people that do, but if someone is going to make the claim that this is the case for most people, than I'd like to see some data backing that up. I say this due to the comments of "most and many", which I take issue with. And I'll reiterate that those who assume the worst do so because of their experiences in life, hence it has more to do with them than those they're charging. As this thread highlights all too well.
The "attitude" was only toward the "wife" in question - not men or women in general. And was due to 2 things: Her sudden and early divorce filing, and the fact that - by law- women are better able to get alimony than men are.

Let me translate: no one said all women are golddiggers, just that when they want to be, the laws (regarding heterosexual marriage) allow them to be more successful at it.

Different kind of marriage means different laws, and lack of precedent - therefore, less of an issue.
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Old 07-10-2009, 03:52 PM
 
18,979 posts, read 11,128,993 times
Reputation: 13049
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mearth View Post
We have all along been speaking of the laws on the books, not the cultural trends nor political correctness of them.
No, you two really haven't been doing that at all. I've seen a bunch of irrational whining from nj, and a weird CT from your posts. That's it.

Quote:
The "attitude" was only toward the "wife" in question - not men or women in general. And was due to 2 things: Her sudden and early divorce filing, and the fact that - by law- women are better able to get alimony than men are.
Again, NO. The link I provided clearly states that is not the case, BY LAW. Also, you have not provided any evidence (that I've seen) that marriages a few months old lend to alimony. If you have this data, I'm certainly interested. As it stands, it doesn't make sense and in my poking around the net, I haven't come across any laws that would support such bologna.

Quote:
Let me translate: no one said all women are golddiggers, just that when they want to be, the laws (regarding heterosexual marriage) allow them to be more successful at it.

Different kind of marriage means different laws, and lack of precedent - therefore, less of an issue.
Prove it.
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Old 07-10-2009, 04:28 PM
 
Location: Rockland County New York
2,984 posts, read 3,465,744 times
Reputation: 1238
I don't need to be disrespectful to the OP but I keep feeling there is another side to his wife that he is not aware of. I keep wondering if there isn't another man in her life. I think he should hire some one to investigate her. The way she is putting distance between the OP and herself makes me believe she is getting love else where.
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Old 07-10-2009, 05:09 PM
 
Location: Alaska
5,151 posts, read 8,428,734 times
Reputation: 3462
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stac2007 View Post
I don't need to be disrespectful to the OP but I keep feeling there is another side to his wife that he is not aware of. I keep wondering if there isn't another man in her life. I think he should hire some one to investigate her. The way she is putting distance between the OP and herself makes me believe she is getting love else where.
Actually, the he is a she, but the other man is a possibility.
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