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Yeah. But what if, three years from now, the house needs a new roof? Or they decide to renovate the kitchen? Or put a pool in the backyard? What if his paycheck is going to defray these improvements? What if she loses her job and he keeps paying the household expenses such as the property taxes? Suddenly, it's not just her house anymore, because he has contributed significantly to its value and helping to maintain her legal possession of the house. Then what happens? It's just not as simple as you imagine it to be.
But you don't do that with a home. If a person wants to put some money or investments aside and keep them separate via some kind of legal agreement, fine. But to use a shared marital home in this regard is wrong. Maybe the sole title holder will decide to use it as leverage and threaten to kick the spouse out when they don't get their way. It's just bad news all the way around.
I've actually seen this in action. It's quite ugly.
Thanks MMichelle for the congrats. Yes, I could be paying for the house with my cash only, but my husband wants to be on the title too so he is putting what little he has in savings to contribute. Essentially, it's still my pre-marital cash that is buying the entire house because his cash would have been going towards some of the moving expenses, household expenses, furniture, etc which would consume all of his savings.
We are closing soon on the house with both our names. Before we got married, I wanted to buy property under my name only but he didn't think it felt right since we'll be married soon and we should think as a team. I just didn't see why it should offend him if I didn't put his name on a house he doesn't pay for. In worst case scenario, it will be half his anyway. I know I am "gifting" half the property to him now and am doing so to start this marriage right and I think he would do the same if the roles were reversed.
I DO NOT know you or your husband, let alone your situations respectively (or mutually).
I do see that you decided to put the house in both your names. It's one of those touchy things to judge.
On one hand I can see and understand your initial reticence for putting the house under both names since it's being paid for via YOUR savings. You've done the work, you've earned the money that's making this happen, etc.
On the other hand (and as you've clearly realized), it's a minefield when it comes to marriage.
I applaud your willingness to take a REAL risk by doing the right thing -- which is to pitch yourself into the marriage whole-heartedly. The same women who are telling you "it's only RIGHT the house is in your name" would be deriding a man about his unwillingness to commit were the situation reversed but otherwise identical.
Nevertheless, since you're now willing to pitch yourself into this the right way, I urge caution on your part.
To that end I DO hope you've really taken your time to get to know this man and to map out (as much as humanly possible) your immediate joint future. You sound like a practical person with a good head on your shoulders so you likely haven't just rushed into this marriage headlong; nevertheless, take your time as much as possible and keep your eyes open.
Believe me, it is MUCH easier -- and BETTER, as hard as that may be to believe -- to walk BEFORE matrimony than even one minute AFTER the "I do's".
I'm currently in the similiar situation of your husband. My husband got his house from his parents. There is a mortgage on the property which we both pay from a joint account. I feel that my husband doesnt trust me therefore he wont add me to title. I dont trust him either. That's why I have a lot of cash stashed away in case something happens. This is not good but he started it with mistrust. I feel a lot of disgust towards my husband because of this issue. I wont make it easy for him. I wont help him with any renovations since its not my home. The thing is once you act mistrusting the other spouse will reciprocate that behaviour. Beware that your marriage can end because of these issues.
I feel that my marraige is unstable because of this. I feel that even if I have children he wont care about them or me. I feel more regret about being married to him because I feel that he cares more about his house then about me. So put yourself in your husband's shoes.
Thanks MMichelle for the congrats. Yes, I could be paying for the house with my cash only, but my husband wants to be on the title too so he is putting what little he has in savings to contribute. Essentially, it's still my pre-marital cash that is buying the entire house because his cash would have been going towards some of the moving expenses, household expenses, furniture, etc which would consume all of his savings.
We are closing soon on the house with both our names. Before we got married, I wanted to buy property under my name only but he didn't think it felt right since we'll be married soon and we should think as a team. I just didn't see why it should offend him if I didn't put his name on a house he doesn't pay for. In worst case scenario, it will be half his anyway. I know I am "gifting" half the property to him now and am doing so to start this marriage right and I think he would do the same if the roles were reversed.
It does not matter if it were bought with pre-marital cash or with a bag of pennies. The point is, you're both married and the house was purchased after you got married. Regardless of who paid what for what, it is a part of marital assets which would be divided in court. Sorry to say its not all yours.
If you are looking to keep something for yourself only and could care less about the husband, you should have bought the house before you got married. Of course he could still contest that in court.
Anything that was bought after marriage can be contested in court and you're trying to make sure you get everything and he gets nothing. Um, why get married then?
But you don't do that with a home. If a person wants to put some money or investments aside and keep them separate via some kind of legal agreement, fine. But to use a shared marital home in this regard is wrong. Maybe the sole title holder will decide to use it as leverage and threaten to kick the spouse out when they don't get their way. It's just bad news all the way around.
Yep. See Himain's current thread. She put the money down on a house that is not in her name. She calls it her house, but his name is on it. He threw her out, and now there's nothing she can do about it.
1. You would be wise to never buy a house until after you are 100% married. Many people never make it to the alter, have bad separations and the this can make the money invested in the house a major issue.
2. Money (and houses) brought into a marriage should be maintained separately and not combined with money earned jointly as a couple. If there is a divorce or death those assets are still not joint but stay separate. Why should a 2 year failed marriage result in the partner taking half your inheritance.
3. You may not be on the deed of the house but in many states like TX you have homestead rights that protect you. The spouse could not sell the house without you signing a few of the documents.
Just my opinion. Anything beyond that it would be wise to consult an attorney.
Matter of fact, anyone who has a few assets, kids and considering remarriage would be wise to talk to a lawyer. Kids have been know to lose large inheritances to some Blonde bimbo with big hooters.
I recently married my husband and buying a new house with cash (no comments necessary on this). I can afford the house myself and wanted to buy the house under my name only since it's being paid for by all my savings earned before marriage. As the guy, would you be OK with that? My husband wants his name on it because he can/will contribute whatever little savings he has towards the house but I don't need him to. His savings would only be only 5% of the total sales price. I know if anything should ever happen between us, state law will split up the property evenly anyway so wanting my name only on the title is not necessarily for "protection". I just think it's fair. He won't have a job when we move so he won't be able to contribute monetarily for a while either. I know if I were in his shoes, I would not blame my husband for not putting my name on the house. I already know what we'll do, which is to include him on the house because I should think of everything as "ours" now, but I wanted to hear other people's thoughts.
Quite frankly this is a pointless fight. If you dont' have a prenup it doesn't matter who's name is or isn't on the house just as you mentioned. You're married and living together. If you split he'll get half regardless due to marital property being split 50/50. To be honest I can't see any reason you wouldn't want his name on it--that's the part that makes this thread interesting.
This has been an interesting thread to read...I purchased a house less than a year before I married my husband and we have been married for over 2 years now. We didn't add my husband to title after we got married and he hasn't asked to be added to title. If he did ask I wouldn't have a problem because it wouldn't hurt anything since we are married and we both live and contribute to the workings of the home. Even if there isn't a mortgage to be paid, there are still home opporating costs such as utilities and so forth. For my situation, my husband moved to marry me and was unemployed for a long portion of the time, but he was equally contributing to our household by keeping up on the cooking and home maintenance, which is valued as an asset because I am not having to pay someone to fullfil those tasks. The upside to adding him to title is if something happened and put me into a coma or something along those lines where I am alive but incohesive. If my husband was on title he could make financial decisions for us, but in our situation now, he has no rights to make decisions on my behalf. Just something to think about...
See an attorney for real answers to legal questions regarding the division of assets in a divorce. Some things I can tell you having just finished a divorce is that in WA state all property is community property. Having said that anything brought into the marriage from before is not considered part of that community property and not subject to division so long as its use is seperate. Gifts and inheritence no matter when they were recieved are also considered seperate property and not subject to division again so long as use is seperate. All of these things can be modified by investment in property. The home bought by one but invested in via capital improvement by both would be up on the block for consideration of that shared investment. Everything else falls into a 50 50 split. This is assuming no prenup. Somewhat outside the scope of this but related is that if you outearn your partner and have been providing the roof over head that use will be considered in relation to possible maintenence that may be awarded.
Getting back to where I started if the real question is how will it shake out in a divorce I would consult an attorney. If you have one you regularly use you can often pop them a quick question like this without charge assuming you need only a brief explantion of the important points.
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