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actually pass the chocolate it is opposite you say.In 2006 until I sold my house in early 2007 I had little cash because after bills and food I was lucky if I had $30 or $40 left for the month.Things happened in a row that made my finances more and more dificult.There were times when a month came around that had a higher than normal bill that I had to use a credit card to eat because the mortgage, power and creditcard bill took my cash or err paycheck.So I had plenty of plastic.......
Sold my house paid off everything walked away with enough to buy a house cash which I just did now where I live now.So now I'm debt free,with a house paid off but not much left in the bank.If I can resist charging up my credit card I will be alright.Not might not be a well off man like you desire but tell you what I am a free person and nobody owns me.
All other things aside, you're doing good. Probably better than 90-95% of Americans right now.
Actually, I do not really wince at this. It's not entirely uncommon for business owners, being one myself, to skim off the liquid of the company and not deposit it. For things that I want to write off on taxes - dinners, drinks, gas, electronics, paper goods, office supplies, computer, phone/utilities, etc. - I will pay it on credit, debit and cash. Depends usually on how much of a rush I'm in and how I want to show it. Things like the LCD HDTV's and other goodies I wanted that I bought this past year, I paid cash. Why pay interest on a $1500 TV when I have the cash? Makes absolutely no sense. Christmas presents - 100% cash and I begin gradually shopping for Christmas gifts every Summer so I do not get financially slammed. As a general rule of thumb for me, if I do not have the cash to back up a purchase, I do not buy it at all - despite the lines of credit I have. With this rule of thumb, I have less than $1000 of credit card debt that I pay off at the end of each month so I do not have to pay interest. I know people who have $20K+ in credit card debt and absolutely no cash to their name who pay the minimum payment - paying interest - acquiring more debt, widening their hole. However, some people must to do this to live, they become a victim of circumstance and have absolutely no choice. This person looks better on paper than someone who pays cash? (of course - there are those that just like credit/debit for ease. . take no offense to what I said about the one who may be a victim of circumstance if it does not apply to you)
Last fall, I dated a man who was very wealthy who paid cash for everything - only saw him use his credit card for our airline tickets, hotel and rental car when we went away for a weekend trip. Like many business owners who may have a stream of cash entering their business (and not solely a check and credit card business) - he "shoe boxed" his cash. If this man were to be judged on his cash spending (and he doesn't look anywhere near a Millionaire by sight, as most do not) - you would have turned your nose up at a man whose main residence is in Maryland, on a 310 acre farm, in a 12,000 SF house - the guy is worth $500 million. But he pays cash 90% of the time. . .
So no, I do not agree that a man paying cash is a red flag at all. Not much can be determined from it. If not a business owner, someone can be drawing cash off funds from an inheritance, the lottery, a legal medical/personal/accident/wrongful death/business settlement, someone who sold out their business and is reaping the rewards, a hefty payout from a divorce, etc. You cannot assume. You just never do know. If it was fact, I should have red flags on myself from head to toe as being a deadbeat too.
Last edited by JeepGirl118; 07-23-2009 at 05:17 PM..
All other things aside, you're doing good. Probably better than 90-95% of Americans right now.
I am in a way better situation than before that's for sure.I do alright for myself,and I mean that literally,because the only reason I am financially stable now and was able to get out of bad situations and now able to buy things I want within reason is because I never took on the debt that would come with a woman specially with kids with too many financial problems that would milk me.Partly also because of job chamge and moving to a less expensive area although I think actually nicer area.Make more money (a little more),less bills= more for myself.
I must say though that on one level I can understand a woman desiring financially well off men like pass the chocolate does but on the other hand it kind of peeves me.Part is probably jealousy because I know I don't and probably never will have millions but on the other hand women like "the banker" don't seem to give one f*** how decent the guy is as long as he is loaded,not saying that about pass the chocolate but remembering "the banker" her post was nothing short of gold digging.
I am in a way better situation than before that's for sure.I do alright for myself,and I mean that literally,because the only reason I am financially stable now and was able to get out of bad situations and now able to buy things I want within reason is because I never took on the debt that would come with a woman specially with kids with too many financial problems that would milk me.Partly also because of job chamge and moving to a less expensive area although I think actually nicer area.Make more money,less bills= more for myself.
I must say though that on one level I can understand a woman desiring financially well off men like pass the chocolate does but on the other hand it kind of peeves me.Part is probably jealousy because I know I don't and probably never will have millions but on the other hand women like "the banker" don't seem to give one f*** how decent the guy is as long as he is loaded,not saying that about pass the chocolate but remembering "the banker" her post was nothing short of gold digging.
I've read a few perceptions here of the kind of man I want. Filthy rich, flashy, showy, with all the toys and whatever else, among other assumptions.
I respect and admire your position LK, you are doing a lot better than most. Add decency to the mix and you're quite a catch, not that you need my validation.
Some people can't grasp that financial security and love can and does co-exist. I want both. I won't accept one without the other. The man I am seeing now is wealthy. I wasn't looking for this level of financial security but I got it. However, he has my attention because he is kind, respectful, intelligent, urbane and comical; a true gentleman. The day he loses that, he's gone, and I am well aware that his money will go with him.
There are those who just want love and don't care about living under a bridge, as long as they're together *gag*. There are gold-diggers on the other end. And then there are women who know first hand that the bridge and the walking ATM are both a waste of time. I want to live well with someone I love.
I've read a few perceptions here of the kind of man I want. Filthy rich, flashy, showy, with all the toys and whatever else, among other assumptions.
I respect and admire your position LK, you are doing a lot better than most. Add decency to the mix and you're quite a catch, not that you need my validation.
Some people can't grasp that financial security and love can and does co-exist. I want both. I won't accept one without the other. The man I am seeing now is wealthy. I wasn't looking for this level of financial security but I got it. However, he has my attention because he is kind, respectful, intelligent, urbane and comical; a true gentleman. The day he loses that, he's gone, and I am well aware that his money will go with him.
There are those who just want love and don't care about living under a bridge, as long as they're together *gag*. There are gold-diggers on the other end. And then there are women who know first hand that the bridge and the walking ATM are both a waste of time. I want to live well with someone I love.
With honesty, what are you bringing to the table. (including financially)
With honesty, what are you bringing to the table. (including financially)
Honestly...
I'm a good woman for starters and I take care of my business. If something goes wrong, I'm not going to live in my car or lose it. This is really about quality of life. I can support myself and my indulgences. I expect to be with someone who's financial situation will allow me to continue to do what I enjoy as well as continue pursuing my goals. Am I going to support a man? No. But I am not looking for someone to support me either. So, I am not sure what, financially, I am expected to bring to the table. That would really be up to him to decide, wouldn't it?
I had this conversation once before. I'd have looked for the thread but it's too much work.
To add to my above posts about myself.I have sacrificed the wealth of family though.As much as I am a introvert/free spirit/independant minded/whatever..there are still times I think that I am missing on the wealth of being a dad even if they were not my blood own and missed out on what might have a good relationship with the woman even if it meant taking on more debt besides my own.
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