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So I met that short haired girl I met at starbucks on Wednesday night at this pretty cool jazz club (she had a sort of artsy, beatnik quality to her, so I thought it was a good idea. Wrong.)
As soon as we walked in, she was immediately approached by tonnes of guys asking how she was, that they hadn't seen her in forever, where she's been (she was studying abroad) how it was, what they've been up to, etc, etc.
They really were male friends of her. She was happy to see them too, but at the same time, I couldn't tell if they really were just trying to catch up with an old friend or trying to pick her up.
Just not to be rude, I introduced myself to every guy that came and talked to her and acted interested and chimed in on whatever they had to say. I was trying to redirect their attention away from her and towards me, but every time I occupied 1 guy, another would come and start chatting her up.
She was just a little social butterfly that night, which is cool, but at the same time, I was hoping we could share the evening and get to know each other personally. I think only half the time she was talking, it was to me, and not some of her other guy friends.
I tried not to appear I was bothered, and decided to strike back by being social too and chat up other people there, including a few girls. I got 1 other girl's number, which was cool, but at the same time, I didn't really get a chance to really get to know my date, reveal myself to her on any deep level and bond with her.
I still got her number. Are such girls worth the time and effort to break away from their cadres of interested male friends?
Ah, ic your gay training manuels didn't prepare you for the old "back door sneaky pete" trick, eh?
Bad move: First date at a place she knows and where the people know her. First date should always be on your turf, or neutral turf. Remember, you want to be in control.
Good move: The way you salvaged the night. Going out and talking to the other girls shows that you at least have the skills to adopt to those kind of situations and that you aren't dead weight in unfamiliar places.
It's up to you if you want to continue pursuing this. Personally, I wouldn't, but that's just me.
Exactly...Always go to neutral turf (or better your turf) for a first date. If she wants to go someplace where she knows everyone, its that she is not that into you. Unfortunately this is often learned by experience.
Also agree that if she starts being a butterfly on a 'date' then its best for you to call it an evening or try to get some numbers as you did. I'd let her ask you out if their is a second date.
You met a person that loves attention and the people coming up hogging her away from you are rude. Very rude. I've had that happen to me before. It's very annoying. It's good to just not date
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyanosphere
So I met that short haired girl I met at starbucks on Wednesday night at this pretty cool jazz club (she had a sort of artsy, beatnik quality to her, so I thought it was a good idea. Wrong.)
As soon as we walked in, she was immediately approached by tonnes of guys asking how she was, that they hadn't seen her in forever, where she's been (she was studying abroad) how it was, what they've been up to, etc, etc.
They really were male friends of her. She was happy to see them too, but at the same time, I couldn't tell if they really were just trying to catch up with an old friend or trying to pick her up.
Just not to be rude, I introduced myself to every guy that came and talked to her and acted interested and chimed in on whatever they had to say. I was trying to redirect their attention away from her and towards me, but every time I occupied 1 guy, another would come and start chatting her up.
She was just a little social butterfly that night, which is cool, but at the same time, I was hoping we could share the evening and get to know each other personally. I think only half the time she was talking, it was to me, and not some of her other guy friends.
I tried not to appear I was bothered, and decided to strike back by being social too and chat up other people there, including a few girls. I got 1 other girl's number, which was cool, but at the same time, I didn't really get a chance to really get to know my date, reveal myself to her on any deep level and bond with her.
I still got her number. Are such girls worth the time and effort to break away from their cadres of interested male friends?
I agree. The female is a sneak which is very common these days.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bosco55David
Bad move: First date at a place she knows and where the people know her. First date should always be on your turf, or neutral turf. Remember, you want to be in control.
Good move: The way you salvaged the night. Going out and talking to the other girls shows that you at least have the skills to adopt to those kind of situations and that you aren't dead weight in unfamiliar places.
It's up to you if you want to continue pursuing this. Personally, I wouldn't, but that's just me.
I agree. The female is a sneak which is very common these days.
Men are much sneakier.
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. I learn more everyday I am on here. 
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