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A. I emotionally cheated
or
B. I physcially cheated
He would go for A every time. So, I don't think womens emotional affairs are any better or worse than mens. They both are still stepping outside the bounds of a relationship.
Ask any married man to leave his wife for the mistress, and you will see the wife always gets priority. That is why she has rank, not the mistress.
True, and there are not many single women who are willing to be with a married man simply for the occasional companionship. But there are some who seek a connection with a man and do not want a full-blown, live in relationship with him. Sorta like an FWB, if you will.
Also keep in mind that many married men strike up affairs with married women. Thus, the "mistress" is in the same position as he is and they both find some comfort in one another's company (and both parties have an equally complelling interest in keeping things discreet).
Being the mistress means that you couldn't make it to wife. A mistress will always rank low, not high.
Hi temptation001,
Does the mistress meet the parents? Nope. Brother, sister or friends? Nope. He won't to take you out to your favorite restaurant. People might see you. Best to go somewhere else where no one knows who you are. A hotel room is nice paid for with cash. And any child that comes from it may benefit from that vanilla envelope every month. Maybe you will get just one for the abortion. He might visit you at the hospital but only if you still look good. You dare not visit him. That's just as well. He's no fun anymore anyway. You'll wait till he gets better, maybe. After all the average affair lasts 2 years and this one is nearly up. After 2 years do really want to see your mother, brother or father anymore.
Does the mistress meet the parents? Nope. Brother, sister or friends? Nope. He won't to take you out to your favorite restaurant. People might see you. Best to go somewhere else where no one knows who you are....
Please read this -- The affair - Salon.com -- and reconsider that what you suggest about lack of fulfillment, etc. may be true for many. Or even most. But it is not true for all.
Please read this -- The affair - Salon.com -- and reconsider that what you suggest about lack of fulfillment, etc. may be true for many. Or even most. But it is not true for all.
Hi professorsenator,
Its all visceral. "Thighs tingling". It reminds me of people who go to restaurants and eat a gourmet dinner and feel satisfied. My dinner may combine tomatoes I started in March with Parmesan cheese I made 2 years ago. I remember looking for the milk. The pasta may be hand cut semolina with basil I also grew. The wine may be from the valley I visited. I remember those meals. For me, the sensual is nothing without the intellectual. All my overtures would retroactively unravel to offer the same hope I gave the last, which is in the end, nothing since the new hope is the end of the old.
If I could offer love to another without betrayal, I would. However to betray for a new intimacy is laced with the same eventual betrayal. The first look I had of my wife would be a look that ends. That I will in the end cast this one away as well must not enter the fantasy. It is, after all, central to the fantasy.
I know exactly what it is that people are doing. They are looking for that first high which is nothing but a fantasy. It is a feeling that is known best when the other person is known the least. It takes very little effort indeed. Nothing could be easier but the moment burns off like a mist. As in George Orwell's 1984, I could not forget the last lover I threw to the rats.
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