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Sounds like shyness. Even when the men know they won't get turned down they are still scared to make a move.
I believe there's some truth to this.
Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742
Not around here! Taste of _______ (insert town), Art Beat, Honk (street music), Food Truck stuff
Yeah, there are families, but college kids, young professionals, adults, etc too. Mostly doesn't matter if you're not going specifically to meet someone but to have fun. Which is part of my point.
Different culture. Marrying young and having kids by the time you're 30 is much more prevalent here than the East Coast, which as you know has been discussed a bazillion times on this board. And a lot of these community events here are free for the event itself so it's a great way to entertain the kiddos for a few hours. Only cost ends up being food, unless you creatively smuggle it in or know someone at the gate who turns the other cheek.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Not too many people stumble up to someone and say "Gee, you're purty! Can I have your number?" Although one of our former members used to brag that he would literally leap in front of women walking down the street, blocking their way, and pretty much do just that. He claimed that m.o. was hugely successful. So, whatever.
I wonder what ever happened to him? Maybe he finally successfully clubbed one on the head and dragged her back to his lair. Last I remember, he was getting serious about someone.
There's a difference between being comfortable talking to women...and being aggressive. The more aggressive guys just play the numbers game. We're not mind readers so we don't know if the cold approach is going to work or not if she is being a wallflower. Aggressive guys basically look at it as a numbers game if they cold approach 50 different wallflower women they assume they might get one phone number out of it. The problem is as a woman you don't want to just rely on aggressive guys approaching you.
If you approach women during the day, you'll have a much better shot than 1 out of 50 lol. Bars/clubs too.
There's a difference between being comfortable talking to women...and being aggressive. The more aggressive guys just play the numbers game. We're not mind readers so we don't know if the cold approach is going to work or not if she is being a wallflower. Aggressive guys basically look at it as a numbers game if they cold approach 50 different wallflower women they assume they might get one phone number out of it. The problem is as a woman you don't want to just rely on aggressive guys approaching you.
I saw some creepers at the last singles event I went to but again when the ratio is 3 men to 1 woman, there's really only so much a guy can do. Also I noticed at a lot of those the women don't really work the room and talk to different guys. The trend seems to be start talking to one guy and stay with him the whole night at the event.
The events I'm talking about weren't huge events, and the women far outnumbered the men. The women couldn't "work the room" because as I said, there were only a few guys, and they were clustered together on one side. They didn't even get the chance to "stay with one guy", because none of the guys responded to any of the women going up to them to say hello.
I wonder what ever happened to him? Maybe he finally successfully clubbed one on the head and dragged her back to his lair. Last I remember, he was getting serious about someone.
He was with a Polish woman for awhile, but he kept posting here for quite awhile after announcing that, so I have no idea.
The events I'm talking about weren't huge events, and the women far outnumbered the men. The women couldn't "work the room" because as I said, there were only a few guys, and they were clustered together on one side. They didn't even get the chance to "stay with one guy", because none of the guys responded to any of the women going up to them to say hello.
I've been at events in which women were practically sitting in the laps of men they just met to "stake their claim" so to speak and ward off the other women. That's what happens when pretty much every event turns into "girl's night out" and a man happens to be there as well. Yeah, that happens all the time, some will say. But not usually at a volunteer event. However, Portlanders manage to turn even that into a competitive sport. Part of why I've been trying new events is because while my friends are great, they are also competition and I need a playing field that's a bit less crowded.
There's a difference between being comfortable talking to women...and being aggressive. The more aggressive guys just play the numbers game. We're not mind readers so we don't know if the cold approach is going to work or not if she is being a wallflower. Aggressive guys basically look at it as a numbers game if they cold approach 50 different wallflower women they assume they might get one phone number out of it. The problem is as a woman you don't want to just rely on aggressive guys approaching you.
I saw some creepers at the last singles event I went to but again when the ratio is 3 men to 1 woman, there's really only so much a guy can do. Also I noticed at a lot of those the women don't really work the room and talk to different guys. The trend seems to be start talking to one guy and stay with him the whole night at the event.
The cold approach doesn't work and I stopped trying that. I could sit next to a hot woman and I won't say a word to her because I don't know her. What would we have to talk about? The weather? That's boring. Date within your social circle.
The events I'm talking about weren't huge events, and the women far outnumbered the men. The women couldn't "work the room" because as I said, there were only a few guys, and they were clustered together on one side. They didn't even get the chance to "stay with one guy", because none of the guys responded to any of the women going up to them to say hello.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NWGirl74
I've been at events in which women were practically sitting in the laps of men they just met to "stake their claim" so to speak and ward off the other women. That's what happens when pretty much every event turns into "girl's night out" and a man happens to be there as well. Yeah, that happens all the time, some will say. But not usually at a volunteer event. However, Portlanders manage to turn even that into a competitive sport. Part of why I've been trying new events is because while my friends are great, they are also competition and I need a playing field that's a bit less crowded.
I've never seen any part of the country that has this supposed lopsized, mass amount of women starving for men to talk to but just can't find them lol. If I wasn't well traveled, I wouldn't make that comment, but I've seen a lot. It's like we're talking about a post World War II Germany where half of the men were killed in battle or something. The entire west coast for the most part is considered a dating haven for women.
Single men men are more likely to migrate to warmer areas and leave their roots...single women are more likely to stay put, stay near family, and stay with what they know. That's why the NE is generally considered to have more single women than other parts of the country.
I've been at events in which women were practically sitting in the laps of men they just met to "stake their claim" so to speak and ward off the other women. That's what happens when pretty much every event turns into "girl's night out" and a man happens to be there as well. Yeah, that happens all the time, some will say. But not usually at a volunteer event. However, Portlanders manage to turn even that into a competitive sport. Part of why I've been trying new events is because while my friends are great, they are also competition and I need a playing field that's a bit less crowded.
Lol where are these events and in what age range?
I've never seen anything like this at all (well not in the US anyway).
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dcarney
If you approach women during the day, you'll have a much better shot than 1 out of 50 lol. Bars/clubs too.
That's probably about right for OLD though.
For OLD I've been having a significantly more than 50% response rate the last few times, more like 75%, its all about being very selective, having a good profile, and writing a good first message. That's why I think dudes don't have to go out to singles events, or go to places to just meet women anymore (ala cruising the strip or whatever), its all right there on your phone and you know they're single, or at least somewhat available.
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