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I like when a man pays. I think it is gentlemanly. I won't object to paying, but to me, splitting things down the middle makes it seem more like meeting a friend. For a bona-fide first date, I wouldn't be very impressed. Meeting someone for coffee after chatting for 30 minutes online? More of a friend thing. It does depend on the situation.
But, I like this idea of dutch. I like to buy a "round" of whatever we are doing, whether it be getting cocktails, playing pool, racing go-karts...you get the idea. That way, I still can contribute and show him that I appreciate what he has planned, but he still "takes care of" most of the date.
we recently ate in a very posh restaurant in Tuscany which had his n hers menus !!! The ladies one had no prices so she could choose what she wanted without feeling embarrassed about prices. thought this was very classy but would bugger up those cheapies who expect the lady to chip in
Well, these places are not for the majority of us. I'm not saying men have to go to such places... It's not like I do. And it's not like I shop at stores with no prices, either. However, if one doesn't get what being a gentleman is (within his means), nothing but the school of hard knocks will teach him. It appears that many women are to blame for these attitudes, too, though.
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Originally Posted by mr&mrssunshine
question -if it end up as a GOOD night -do you half to supply half the condom?????????????????
We can safely assume there won't be any need for that! Hey, more savings!
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Originally Posted by Twinkle Toes
Um .... did I mention I like to go Greek on the first date?
One way to go dutch is go to the Cheesecake Factory and order one entree because they serve so much food for one. Hence you could split an entree between two people. The last thing I ordered there the plate was the side of a baking dish and the waitress could barely hold the thing. In fact there was enough food you could add a third person and go menage et trois.
One way to go dutch is go to the Cheesecake Factory and order one entree because they serve so much food for one. Hence you could split an entree between two people. The last thing I ordered there the plate was the side of a baking dish and the waitress could barely hold the thing. In fact there was enough food you could add a third person and go menage et trois.
Lord knows I don't have any money, but if I was a man, and I had a date, I would take her to an all-you-can-eat restaurant and let her pig out on my 10 dollars. I would treasure the memory even if it didn't work out, since I would feel better about myself feeding a starving person for one night.
But I understand if a man is broke (Ron), and can't pay. I would try to not lord it over him too much and hope he gets a job soon. In fact, I would up the ante and pay for the whole meal, though i'm not rich by any standards. I'm sure that feeding the poor is a good thing.
Lord knows I don't have any money, but if I was a man, and I had a date, I would take her to an all-you-can-eat restaurant and let her pig out on my 10 dollars. I would treasure the memory even if it didn't work out, since I would feel better about myself feeding a starving person for one night.
But I understand if a man is broke (Ron), and can't pay. I would try to not lord it over him too much and hope he gets a job soon. In fact, I would up the ante and pay for the whole meal, though i'm not rich by any standards. I'm sure that feeding the poor is a good thing.
Well right now a lot of people are either underemployed or out of work or headed for being out of work. Most everyone I come across these days is either in that boat or has a close friend or relative that is.
Having experienced other cultures now, I think us americans put too much stock into the numerical value of things. Every time this topic comes up on this forum, it is always besieged with women that are indignant if a man is not willing to pony up to a certain level of service. They seemed more concerned about that than the actual person. Hence no wonder the divorce rate and relationship unhappyness in this country.
This weekend I had my wallet lightened by treating quite a few members of my extended family for dinner and ice cream. I didn't mind it a bit. Not the least because those people have done many nice things for me. It's the same with dating. There has to be a two way street there. And it's not about keeping an accounting ledger either. It's about some give and take.
If it's always on me to buy everything, make all the arrangements and make everything happen, there is no real relationship there. And people have to have some common sense and reality. Most people are not living in a movie with endless sources of funds and time to do endless dreamy activities and dinners. So in these times for some random woman to expect and demand high levels of service and spending, I think is unrealistic and doesn't match reality.
Well right now a lot of people are either underemployed or out of work or headed for being out of work. Most everyone I come across these days is either in that boat or has a close friend or relative that is.
Having experienced other cultures now, I think us americans put too much stock into the numerical value of things. Every time this topic comes up on this forum, it is always besieged with women that are indignant if a man is not willing to pony up to a certain level of service. They seemed more concerned about that than the actual person. Hence no wonder the divorce rate and relationship unhappyness in this country.
This weekend I had my wallet lightened by treating quite a few members of my extended family for dinner and ice cream. I didn't mind it a bit. Not the least because those people have done many nice things for me. It's the same with dating. There has to be a two way street there. And it's not about keeping an accounting ledger either. It's about some give and take.
If it's always on me to buy everything, make all the arrangements and make everything happen, there is no real relationship there. And people have to have some common sense and reality. Most people are not living in a movie with endless sources of funds and time to do endless dreamy activities and dinners. So in these times for some random woman to expect and demand high levels of service and spending, I think is unrealistic and doesn't match reality.
I understand all the women's viewpoints here, since Ron made it seem like he was doing this just to be a jerk. I would be indignant too if that was the case with my date. But I guess sometimes, people just need a few extra dollars to make the week and wont admit to it, so they come off as being jerks.
I think that it's completely reasonable for both parties to split the check on the first date.
I would insist on trying to pay my part if I were on a first date with someone (I'm female).
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In fact, I would up the ante and pay for the whole meal, though i'm not rich by any standards. I'm sure that feeding the poor is a good thing.