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Old 09-02-2009, 11:12 PM
 
1,159 posts, read 2,391,748 times
Reputation: 717

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Quote:
Originally Posted by calipoppy View Post
Very hypocritical.

American men want to have their cake and eat it, too!

The Amercan men of today don't live up to the standards of men of the older generations.

But American men want American women to go out and make money; pay 1/2 the mortgage and other bills; look pretty; stay skinny; give porno quality lovin in the bedroom; pick up the kids and take them to soccer/ballet practice; cook like Wolfgang Puck; keep the house spotless; and keep our mouths shut.

These same men will leave the woman who does ALL of these things simply because she has reached her expiration date of being 48 years old and trade her in for the 22 year old secretary at the office.

Then they don't want to pay alimony to the woman who stopped her own career to put him through med/law/business school; bore and raised his children; managed the houshold; gave dinner parties to help him get promoted or land that big account or score that big investor.

Then American men have the audacity to call us "too independent" if we pay our own bills. Or, if not, we are "gold diggers" because we aren't independent enough. Or, if we just happen to make more money, they call us "materialistic".

American aren't jealous of Asian women we're just really disappointed in American men.
No, we want our cake and eat YOU, too. But you had a feigned headache, so you didn't get that tonight.

As far as today's men (and just what age demographic are you talking about?) goes, you have little real idea of what men of previous generations were actually about, the exceptions being your grandfather and your dad, which are mere anecdotal examples.

For example, in the immediate wake of the end of WWII, women who had been working in factories to support the war effort were basically all fired so that the men could have those jobs and because, well, the male establishment of the time just didn't see welding and metal work as things a proper woman should be doing.

Then let's go back to before Prohibition era, when rape was rarely reported because rape victims were somehow seen as dirty or "asking for it," when widespread alcoholism saw women getting beaten in numbers that dwarf today's per capita figures and it was largely seen as "okay" and part of a man controlling his domain.

Is that what you want to return to? You want to go back to the days when women weren't permitted to enter Ivy League schools because, well, all that book learning is wasted on someone who should just stay home, keep house and raise the sprogs anyway. Or, as Thomas Jefferson once wrote, women shouldn't have the vote because politics is just too nettlesome a business for women?

Now as far as child rearing and house cleaning goes, I am in my 50's and have never wanted kids and since I am a big boy I know how to pick up after myself (in fact, I'm something of a neat freak, though not obsessively so). I have never demanded from any of my girlfriends that they do my laundry because, well, I didn't want to gross them out. So I do my own and have since I entered college.

It's great that women work, but they also have the choice of quitting to be homemakers and society is fine with that. However, if a man stays home with the kiddies and is Mr. Mom, society laughs at him and questions his masculinity.

Women do see men as economic objects (research has borne that out) and feel perfectly entitled to do so while men are bad because we like women to look good since we are visually oriented. Indeed, what really rankles many married men is that women just seem to lose all interest in their appearance once they got a hand on his ATM card. They cut their hair and bulk up and thus begin looking like linebackers rather than the hot babe he once had.

Furthermore, all of the conditions women put up with are entirely voluntary. You don't HAVE to give birth, you don't have to get married and you don't have to move in with your man. And you don't have to quit your job. You can have a perfectly good long lasting relationship without any of those things. And most women have a pretty good idea that their man ain't gonna be doing any housework once they move in together. That isn't excusing slobby behavior by men (and you will note the remark I made about many men being arse scratching boors). But women do have an inkling of what they are in for in that department before they tie the knot.

As for cheating, it takes two sexes to tango (unless you're Larry Craig or Mark Foley). Men are putting it somewhere and someone is taking what they're offering. In fact, I have heard of some single guys who wear wedding rings to pick up bars because a lot of women, and women are very competitive with each other, love the thrill of taking another woman's man from her. It is a weird kind of self-validation and confirmation of her attractiveness.

As for the independence issue, I don't know where you get that. I actually like it when a woman has her own interests and brings content to the relationship. I am real independent myself (and am always busy with something) and so I'm not into holding somebody down because I realize how stifling that is.

Nevertheless, alimony is a joke because it gives women the choice of being a kind of societally approved welfare queen plus it rewards laziness. A woman with only a high school education can just live off her former husband's income while she either does nothing (like Barry Bonds' ex-wife, who is getting $30,000 A MONTH in child support in addition to alimony) or uses it for her own leisure pursuits. If you abolish alimony (and I would also impose caps on child support payments, too) you force women to realize that they have to stick up for themselves rather than taking the easy way out and live off of a man.

And listen, if you want to quit your job to either keep house or raise kids, you will then be forced to carefully consider all the possible consequences of that decision and whether you are truly ready for possible negative fallout. If you really value "independence" then doing away with alimony should be on your agenda since it will encourage more self-reliant behavior among young women and when gold digging disappears it will enhance the image of all members of that sex.

 
Old 09-02-2009, 11:17 PM
 
3,220 posts, read 4,057,665 times
Reputation: 1815
RobE - Between our 2 posts lets see if anyone "gets" it.
 
Old 09-02-2009, 11:55 PM
 
12,660 posts, read 8,424,321 times
Reputation: 4743
Quote:
Originally Posted by calipoppy View Post
Very hypocritical.

American men want to have their cake and eat it, too!

Hi calipoppy,

Yes its true. That is all of humanity

Quote:
The Amercan men of today don't live up to the standards of men of the older generations.
They are certainly more domestic. My father could boil hot dogs. That's about it. That was typical.

Quote:
But American men want American women to go out and make money; pay 1/2 the mortgage and other bills; look pretty; stay skinny;
This is true sometimes but if such men are taking on domestic duties this is reasonable. You can't just take what individual men want and combine them into some particular want it all prototype. One man wants women to work while another wants her to stay home .The occasional jerk wants it all.

Quote:
give porno quality lovin in the bedroom; pick up the kids and take them to soccer/ballet practice; cook like Wolfgang Puck; keep the house spotless; and keep our mouths shut.
This has some truth. Pornography is a competitive force. Probably more so now than before.

Quote:
These same men will leave the woman who does ALL of these things simply because she has reached her expiration date of being 48 years old and trade her in for the 22 year old secretary at the office.
Also true. That 22 year old girl didn't give that 48 year old the time of day when he was 22 and he remembers. Women have the power in their 20's, achieve parody in the mid 30s and are in the weaker position starting in their 40s. .

Quote:
Then they don't want to pay alimony to the woman who stopped her own career to put him through med/law/business school; bore and raised his children; managed the houshold; gave dinner parties to help him get promoted or land that big account or score that big investor.
They don't want to but that changed.

Quote:
Then American men have the audacity to call us "too independent" if we pay our own bills. Or, if not, we are "gold diggers" because we aren't independent enough. Or, if we just happen to make more money, they call us "materialistic".
Again this is the fictional super jerk and is a collection of bad male behavior Frankenstein parts.


Quote:
American aren't jealous of Asian women we're just really disappointed in American men.

The trouble is other women are even more disappointed in their own men. Looking around the world in general :

Asia: American or European men with Asian women follow that sexual dimorphic pattern where race exaggerates sexually dimorphic appearances. The men seem more masculine and the women more feminine. The same effect applies with African men and European women. The black male generally is on balance more masculine than the European male. If it gives it any credibility I am of European decent. Also European women will appear more feminine.

Russia/Eastern Europe: Given the financial disparity Western men will appear as good providers. Additionally men in those regions tend to have poor life expectancies and as point out older men trickle down into the dating pool. A 60 year old takes a 50 year old who then shifts 50 year old men to seek 40 year old and so on. Fewer of those men are their upping the supply of available women. Additionally the drinking issue makes far fewer good mates.

Latin America: Once again in wealthy countries men appear as good providers. This does not help the bargaining power of women nearly so much. Its simply an entire country that has that classic problem where wealthy women have more difficult matches.

What is true in all 3 cases is American men are perceived to be easy going while American women are perceived to be uptight. In the other cultures described it is the opposite where the men are uptight and the women are perceived as easy going.
 
Old 09-04-2009, 03:44 PM
 
Location: In my house LOL!
6 posts, read 13,041 times
Reputation: 16
[quote=TheCaliforniaBear;10578479]A lot of ignorance and racism in this thread.....

Let's see, a typical American woman: overweight, loud, opinionated, gets offended by everything, crude, materialistic. And she see all these things as the sign of being a "strong woman".

Not true I am Mexican and I know a lot of white men who go to MX to get married. The girls from there will marry them but when they get their paper they are out of there! What is it with white men buying love?
 
Old 09-04-2009, 04:31 PM
 
1,016 posts, read 1,243,322 times
Reputation: 1137
Quote:
Originally Posted by John23 View Post
There's another thread about white men and asian women being a perfect match.

This thread is specifically about older white men and young asian women. Older being over 40. And the asian woman being under 40 or 35, with a 10 or 20 year age difference between them.

I have a neighbor up my street who I see out in his yard all the time. Very dedicated and disciplined to cutting the lawn and gardening. He's probably at least 60. And he's always with a young asian lady. Probably no older than 35. I'm assuming wife or gf because she's there everytime he's there. And the way they act towards each other, I dont think its an adopted daughter.

Whats the pyschology behind it? Esp if there's a really big age gap, like 25 years. What would an asian family think? Does it ever get to be weird?

I think it would get weird (regardless of race) if you're much older than her dad. Her dad being 50, and you're 62.
She is hoping that he dies soon so she can take his money. No woman would willingly date a man that old out of pure 'love'. She wants something from him. And men who deny this are fools.

The Asian family wouldn't say much of it, but will be disgusted secretly.

What's with all of the Asiaphilia up here?
 
Old 09-04-2009, 05:13 PM
 
Location: The Jar
10,091 posts, read 5,570,324 times
Reputation: 19156
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peggy Anne View Post
Assertive women get called bad names. Assertive men are called "go getters."

YOU GO GIRL!
 
Old 09-10-2009, 06:07 PM
 
1 posts, read 3,874 times
Reputation: 10
I think its because Asian women show more respect twards the man. They dont generally like to fight (although they tend to be exteremly jelous). They think the family structure is the most important thing in the world. Im talking about native Asians that is. To divorce or even break up is shameful. I encourage any white guy to seek a forign Asian wife. They appreciate his love and attentiveness so much more. Its been 2 years now and I still havent been able to marry my Filipino fiance.
mailorderbridesecrets.com
 
Old 09-10-2009, 06:32 PM
 
Location: Houston, Texas
898 posts, read 1,946,004 times
Reputation: 754
Default Goes both ways

I'm one of those typical below-standards American men and I'll have to admit some of what you say is true about us. But what about you women? My first wife ran around on me with a co-worker at her part-time job near the house. When I caught them sneeking into his apartment I got a big lecture about how I was always away on business and un-attentive when I was at home. Dang - I had to go to where the money was overseas in the oilfields. She sure had her hand out every two weeks for me to turn over the paycheck. I found out that she was even helping her lovenest buddy pay the rent on their lovenest with the money I was sending back from West Africa!

My current wife is a sweetheart. Cooks like a gourmet chef, keeps a great house (the old one kept a great pig-stye), helped us get our big house that I couldn't have afforded with her professional income.

The bottom line is that there are good PEOPLE and bad PEOPLE in this word. Not only bad men (from the women's point of view) or bed women (from the jilted guy point of view). Probably a lot more of the bad. Just make sure you don't marry one of them. Trust me, it's better to be lonely and single than with a spouse like my first!


Quote:
Originally Posted by calipoppy View Post
Very hypocritical.

American men want to have their cake and eat it, too!

The Amercan men of today don't live up to the standards of men of the older generations.

But American men want American women to go out and make money; pay 1/2 the mortgage and other bills; look pretty; stay skinny; give porno quality lovin in the bedroom; pick up the kids and take them to soccer/ballet practice; cook like Wolfgang Puck; keep the house spotless; and keep our mouths shut.

These same men will leave the woman who does ALL of these things simply because she has reached her expiration date of being 48 years old and trade her in for the 22 year old secretary at the office.

Then they don't want to pay alimony to the woman who stopped her own career to put him through med/law/business school; bore and raised his children; managed the houshold; gave dinner parties to help him get promoted or land that big account or score that big investor.

Then American men have the audacity to call us "too independent" if we pay our own bills. Or, if not, we are "gold diggers" because we aren't independent enough. Or, if we just happen to make more money, they call us "materialistic".

American aren't jealous of Asian women we're just really disappointed in American men.
 
Old 05-03-2011, 12:18 PM
 
1 posts, read 2,598 times
Reputation: 11
I am in a wonderful relationship with an asian american woman 20 years my junior. When we first seeing each other i have to admit it was purely sexual and I could not wait to see that nice tight little body of hers, but I am here to tell you now that we are in love and have been together for the last 3 years. Not married, but in a loving relationship where we are best friends and look to marry and have children. I have never met anyone more wonderful in my life and I am overwhelmed with the love that we share for each other. I am 48 and she is 28, we have the most wonderful times together and our friends are very supportive of us and realize that we were made for one another. All I can I say is that I didnt mean for it to turn out this way, but it did and we are both the happiest we have ever been in life. We also realize that 20 years from now I will be 68 and she will be 48........it makes no difference..we dig each other for life and it is apparent.
 
Old 05-03-2011, 08:25 PM
 
Location: Guangzhou, China
8,250 posts, read 6,613,271 times
Reputation: 8602
I'm 27 and seeing a 21 y/o Asian American gal... a six-year gap is pretty big in your 20's.

A lot of people don't like it

Oh well.
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