|
08-31-2009, 01:10 PM
|
|
Senior Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: OKC
504 posts, read 197,295 times
Reputation: 261
|
|
Funny farting stories...
We've all been there. In a public place, in front of another person, having a good time, and then bam! That fart just sneaks up out of nowhere. Can you hold it in? Should you excuse yourself? How long should you wait before you come back? Will it make a noise? Will it be a SBD? UGH! What to do?!? Or my question for this thread: What did you do?
Everyone can thank Ms. Jeepers and her booger, farter thread for this one. But I'm not looking for a debate. I just want to hear the funny stories! Here, I'll start...
I am not one to fart in public, but I am one to die laughing when someone else does. That's why this story was awful for me! I was at a friend's house. There were three girls and three guys sitting around a table. A girl to my left and a guy to my right. The girl to my left had on flip flops. We were talking having a good time.
Before I knew it I had to fart. It was one of those where if I would have stood up to excuse myself the backside pressure release would have made it come out. And it probably would have been loud. So smart me thought I'd just let a little out at a time. Nice. Quiet. No one would be none the wiser.
So round one starts. A little out. No noise. I'm safe. Then someone asked what that smell was. I wasn't expecting smell. I'm busted! These chicks were hot. What was I going to do? Before I could come up with an excuse the female to my left apologized and blamed it on her feet! She said she was at cheer practice all day was really sorry. And people bought it! I wasn't going to fess up.
Well, by the third or fourth round the guy to my right caught on. When I saw him laughing under his breath, I started laughing under my breath. Laughing and holding in gas at the same time was quite difficult. It stayed quiet, but it all started coming out at once.
The entire time the chick to my left keep apologizing. Shortly after she got up and left. She left and smell quit. I have never told anybody that story and my friend who caught on never brought it up again. Maybe he was sneaking them out also? Who knows!
Anyway, there is my embarrassing story. What's yours?
|
|
08-31-2009, 01:15 PM
|
|
Senior Member
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2009
270 posts, read 66,387 times
Reputation: 126
|
|
|
This should me moved to the
- Misc
- Misc
site quite soon.
|
|
08-31-2009, 01:41 PM
|
|
Senior Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: OKC
504 posts, read 197,295 times
Reputation: 261
|
|
|
Wow. Let's go anal. How about this: Funny fart stories while in a relationship or wanting to be in a relationship or by your SO...geesh.
|
|
08-31-2009, 01:47 PM
|
|
Another PIA Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Florida [back to Phoenix in February '10]
6,978 posts, read 2,131,229 times
Reputation: 5142
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by FourOhFive
Wow. Let's go anal. How about this: Funny fart stories while in a relationship or wanting to be in a relationship or by your SO...geesh.
|
Topic seems to fit in this category to me! Dating farting stories.  |
|
08-31-2009, 01:53 PM
|
|
Senior Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Coral Springs, Fl
802 posts, read 286,384 times
Reputation: 317
|
|
|
I don't crop dust in public, but if I smell it and think I know who did it I will make a big "stink" and complain to make whomever did it uncomfortable.
Sometimes you can't help it, you get a case of the "walking farts" and it just comes out.
It took 4 years for me to fart in front of the gf, and when I did I gave her a covered wagon. Now she has her own set of sheets.
|
|
08-31-2009, 01:58 PM
|
|
Another PIA Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Florida [back to Phoenix in February '10]
6,978 posts, read 2,131,229 times
Reputation: 5142
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by eger
I don't crop dust in public, but if I smell it and think I know who did it I will make a big "stink" and complain to make whomever did it uncomfortable.
Sometimes you can't help it, you get a case of the "walking farts" and it just comes out.
It took 4 years for me to fart in front of the gf, and when I did I gave her a covered wagon. Now she has her own set of sheets.
|
Crop dust?! LOL!!! Either I am easily amused or you are just realllyyYYyy funny!  |
|
08-31-2009, 02:02 PM
|
|
Senior Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: OKC
504 posts, read 197,295 times
Reputation: 261
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by JeepGirl118
Crop dust?! LOL!!! Either I am easily amused or you are just realllyyYYyy funny! |
He is just realllyyYYyy funny! Crop dust! I can see it.
Thanks for the support! |
|
08-31-2009, 02:06 PM
|
|
Senior Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Coral Springs, Fl
802 posts, read 286,384 times
Reputation: 317
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by JeepGirl118
Crop dust?! LOL!!! Either I am easily amused or you are just realllyyYYyy funny! |
I have my 8 year old niece saying it now, and you know anything directly related to farts a kid will enjoy. Unfortunately when spending the weekend with Uncle Matt she picks up new vocabulary. Kinda reminds me of when I was a kid spending the weekend over my granpas house and he would tell me dirty jokes. I would never forget them either.  |
|
08-31-2009, 05:54 PM
|
|
Another PIA Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Florida [back to Phoenix in February '10]
6,978 posts, read 2,131,229 times
Reputation: 5142
|
|
You're silly, Matt.
I don't have any farting stories. I have a tinkle story from when I was about 9-10 years old and one of the boys there with us at the park would not let me down off of the Teeter Tawter to go to the bathroom and he was bouncing it so hard laughing and made me cry cause it hurt holding it so badly. . . that was my best friends brother. He still razzes me to this day about tinkling on him down the grain of the wood on teeter tawter. But he totally deserved it. |
|
08-31-2009, 06:00 PM
|
|
Proud cancer survivor
|
|
Join Date: Sep 2008
2,355 posts, read 944,748 times
Reputation: 1379
|
|
State trooper was sitting is dispatch one day. Well he had a case of the vapors. I was on the radio dispatching something and he let one ripped. He then stated that he almost chitted his pants.
I started laughing so hard, I had to repeat my last transmission.   |
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
|
|
Welcome to City-Data.com forum! Make sure to register - it's free and very quick! You have to register before you can post and participate in our discussions with 700,000 other registered members. User profiles and some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your free account you will be able to customize many options, you will have the full access to over 15,000 posts/day about local topics and you will see fewer ads. 
Linear Mode
