Need some advice.... (dating, girlfriend, girls, loving)

[willacoochee]

Well this can be a continuation from my other topic. Anyway me and my girlfriend have officially broke up she is seeing another guy and I am talking to another girl. The girl I am talking to tonight has expressed feelings towards me and I do have feelings back towards her. But all at the same time I still have feelings for my ex. I have a strong feeling she is going to find out who this boy really is and want me back. I dont want to hurt the girl that I am talking to now, but I also feel I shouldnt have to wait for my ex!!! I am confused!!! Plus the no contact rule can't apply for me and my ex because we have school together and we partners in the class and cannot change that. I still have the loving, caring, feeling for her (the ex), but idk..... Ask
questions if you need more of an insight or clarification!!!

I have told the new girl I am talking to that I need to give it time I dont want to jump into anything to soon, but that seemed to have hurt her feelings?? Whats a guy to do?

[Thursday007]

Originally Posted by willacoochee

Well this can be a continuation from my other topic. Anyway me and my girlfriend have officially broke up she is seeing another guy and I am talking to another girl. The girl I am talking to tonight has expressed feelings towards me and I do have feelings back towards her. But all at the same time I still have feelings for my ex. I have a strong feeling she is going to find out who this boy really is and want me back. I dont want to hurt the girl that I am talking to now, but I also feel I shouldnt have to wait for my ex!!! I am confused!!! Plus the no contact rule can't apply for me and my ex because we have school together and we partners in the class and cannot change that. I still have the loving, caring, feeling for her (the ex), but idk..... Ask
questions if you need more of an insight or clarification!!!

I have told the new girl I am talking to that I need to give it time I dont want to jump into anything to soon, but that seemed to have hurt her feelings?? Whats a guy to do?

I adhere to a strict 30-60 day moratorium between relationships and dating. I think it's only fair to the other person I would be with that my baggage is in check. It isn't fair to them, because they may have gone through the same thing as you have.

[PassTheChocolate]

I think you probbaly should have given it some time before dating again. The one you meet right after a break up will rarely be more than a rebound, IMO. I think you should consider backing off or, at the very least, continue being honest with her. But if she's hurt now, I'd say save her more grief later and let her go.

[willacoochee]

Thanks for yalls input!!
Yes this new girl completely knows that I still have feelings for my ex and have told her that right now it is to soon to pursue a relationship... Then this new girl tells me it hurts her knowing I still have feelings for my ex but is appreciative that I am honest with her!! Me and the new girl text constantly and I make sure to tell her each day I do not want her to think I am using her and still have feelings for my ex....

[RVlover]

Sorry to hear about the breakup ; it can be hard when that happens. My advice is that you need to take some time off of committing yourself to anyone and allow your heart to mend . Explain that to the new girl and if she is understanding and mature, she should not fight you on that. If she does, then still take some time off cause you know its best . Theres a chance your ex g/f will return in the future but dont wait for her...instead enjoy your life and dont put her as the determining factor as to whether you will be happy or not. During your downtime from dating, I would surround yourself with your guy friends, family, hobbies, special interests, school studies, reading, music, etc.. and make sure youre not at a loose end for any length of time. Use the time constructively and it will help clear your head. Its easy to get caught up in the relationship-addiction thing feeling you must have someone of the opposite sex...but, work to overcome that and enjoy just who you are. Take it easy.

[willacoochee]

Thanks!!! Its just so hard seeing her (my ex) move on so fast... mostly frustrating because I feel completely forgotten!! She seems to have someone to share memories with and I want that all at the same time, but also enjoy the single life able to do what I want!!

[yankeegirl313]

Yeah..its a tough deal when its "in your face" like that.
I would suggest ignoring it. She`s more than likely getting a big kick out of it anyway. You will feel better soon!

[Nic.]

I have always felt they are your ex for a reason.

"Don't let the ex effect the next."

[OhioSouthern546]

I definately don't agree with hurting anyone else and you should lead this girl on to a relationship or anything serious until you've recovered from the previous one.

However, I totally think you should be dating. You sound like you're young, in college, too early to be getting too serious. Just enjoy meeting other girls for a while. Keep seeing this other girl in a fun manner without leading her on to promise of something serious. It sounds like you're already at that point with her and I don't think it's possible to go back. The best remedy for getting over someone is to find someone new.

You need to let go of the ex completely. Even if she wanted to come back, you really want someone who is unsure that you're the right person for them? How many times will you let them flip-flop before you're heartbroken enough to move on?

[akck]

The only other thing I recommend is that you break up any class partnerships with your ex as soon as you can. I think it will make it easier for you in the long run.