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Women lose negotiating power, men gain it as we age.
An attractive women may face a problem attracting men for the first time in their lives after divorcing in her late 30s and onward. It starts out with a 100 girls at birth to roughly 106 boys. Some boys die off due to the Y chromosome exposing bad recessive sex linked traits and just seem all around more fragile. Then they start riding donor cycles and die in many grievous and horrifying ways do in some part to our reckless stupidity. Men are thus slowly whittled down in number. Women in their 20s and 30s get offers from both men in their age group and older. An attractive women is swamped with opportunities. When you are in your 20s the negotiating power is not even close. The women dominate.
However at the age of 35, the sex ratio is about even and from there after, women out number men. Don't forget prison in the number crunching. Men are far more accomplished criminals and are unavailable in prison. Many of the same men they desire are getting attention from younger women. It gets worse every year. So for the men who survive and stay healthy into older age they have more hope albeit with women past fertility. Its a little depressing for everyone, because it seems its just about making babies for natures sake than making any of us happy.
Ok, I got a few sentences in and it looks as though she is speaking from all areas. Financial, emotional, etc.
I really do not know who has a better time of it. I think at one point or another, each person has a hard time with any aspect of divorce....
Hi Pikantari,
I would say men if they find another mate.If not, its the women who bounce back. Men do horribly without women. Women tend to chug along much better without men comparatively speaking IMHO. The fact that single men die off much quicker seems to bear this out. Men's entire social network is often though their mates. When the woman leaves, he has little or none.
Women are worse off financially for the most part-this is a proven fact. They have the children and get stiffed on child support and usually make 30% less pay than men for the same job.
Emotionally, I have seen men bite the dust; turn bitter, become alkies or druggies, quit their jobs or get fired etc. It is really sad to see and I have seen a couple of women go through this but, not nearly as much as again, they have the children of which to think.
It may come down, emotionally anyway, to who leaves who. The person that gets left always has a harder time because the other person has already dealt with the feelings of loss.
It is much easier for men to move on because there is usually a line of women waiting to get their hands on them. For some reason in American society, it's perfectly acceptable for a man to age. However, women over a certain age are considered undesireable and there are fewer men who are willing to date women in their 30's/40's or older. Especially if they have children, which women usually end up with custody of.
If women decided men over 30/40 were unattractive, men would be way more willing to date women their own age.
I think one reason men appear not to take it as hard, is that it takes most men awhile to actually realize what they have lost. There are other extremes to this. Some men get so distraught over it, that they end up in a deep depression, some times turning to alcohol or worse. And then there are those that remarry so quickly, they never had time to even mourn the loss of the marriage that just ended.
It is much easier for men to move on because there is usually a line of women waiting to get their hands on them. For some reason in American society, it's perfectly acceptable for a man to age. However, women over a certain age are considered undesireable and there are fewer men who are willing to date women in their 30's/40's or older. Especially if they have children, which women usually end up with custody of.
If women decided men over 30/40 were unattractive, men would be way more willing to date women their own age.
Hi CESpeed,
Its not for some reason. Sex is not entertainment, its procreation. All men need to do is put a quarter in and are thus fertile at an older age. That is why its "acceptable" for men to age because they can father children until Abishag . Men who find women attractive past fertility have NO offspring. This may even be a decision to have children where a 50 year old man would need a younger women.
There is some indirect advantage that I can see for women remaining attractive to help her route more resources to her existing offspring.
1. Get over your ex-husband. He is gone.
2. Women fair worse after divorce, for many reasons. Me, I sacrificed my career for my spouse, he made the "big" money, so when he was transferred, I just quit my job. I have basically no retirement, while he has a fat pension.
3. I could not stand being married to him any longer, and had no money for an attorney, I just left. I am glad. I just did not want anything to do with him, even the thought of seeing him in court was nauseating for me.
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Women lose negotiating power, men gain it as we age.
