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Old 09-08-2009, 11:07 AM
 
Location: East Valley, AZ
3,852 posts, read 7,986,172 times
Reputation: 3983

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I've heard two guys say this phrase in the last week, and I am so completely annoyed...

Over the weekend I had lunch with an acquaintance whose fiancee had just broken off their engagement two weeks prior. He was having a rough time with things, specifically trying to win her back, because he believed it wasn't over. The thing that got me was how he described his ex-SO. She has depression, diabetes, and is suicidal. All 3 things she does nothing to fix. She lives at home with her parents and is under no care for any of her medical conditions. I was absolutely floored by the fact that he would even consider marrying someone with issues like that. It's one thing to have them, but another to NOT do anything to take care of them. His reasoning? "I don't think I can do any better."

The other guy is the son of a coworker. He jumped into marriage with a girl a few weeks ago, whom he had been dating on and off for a few years. This girl is complete trash. She lives off of Government welfare, refuses to get a job, and has 2 kids from 2 different guys who she throws on her family to take care of, she is a druggie, smokes a few packs a day, and sits home and watches TV 24/7. Why did he marry her? "I can't do any better."

IMO, if you TRULY believe "you can't do any better", wouldn't it be better to just be SINGLE? Why would these guys settle for girls like this? I can't understand what they get out of it. Any thoughts?

By the way, both of these guys are outstanding men. They are hard working, respectful people, who deserve to be with a real woman.
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Old 09-08-2009, 11:12 AM
 
Location: Whiteville Tennessee
8,262 posts, read 15,909,760 times
Reputation: 10016
So "real women" dont have depression, smoke, watch tv or break up with men? Huh. Interesting!
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Old 09-08-2009, 11:15 AM
 
Location: Mountains of Oregon
15,059 posts, read 16,945,330 times
Reputation: 10238
Some folks are gluttons for punishment.

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Old 09-08-2009, 11:16 AM
 
Location: Birmingham
756 posts, read 1,666,646 times
Reputation: 924
They should read "35 year mistake" post. Do they want to be with someone for 35 years then wake up one day and realize they don't love them or that they haven't been truly loved for the past 35 years?

How old are they? That is the real problem that people rush into getting married instead of traveling and seeing some things before hand. I didn't get married until I was in my late 30's. I know what else is out there and so I have no regrets about my choice, and hopefully never will.
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Old 09-08-2009, 11:17 AM
 
Location: East Valley, AZ
3,852 posts, read 7,986,172 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. Dan View Post
So "real women" dont have depression, smoke, watch tv or break up with men? Huh. Interesting!
REAL women take care of themselves when they know they have those issues.
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Old 09-08-2009, 11:17 AM
mwv
 
207 posts, read 580,645 times
Reputation: 189
Below a certain age range, there's an effective shortage of women because a small percentage of very good looking guys are juggling 2-3-4 women at a time in various types of relationships, taking those women off the market.

It's similar to most of the animal kingdom, just less extreme.

End of story.
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Old 09-08-2009, 11:20 AM
 
Location: East Valley, AZ
3,852 posts, read 7,986,172 times
Reputation: 3983
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1984vt View Post
They should read "35 year mistake" post. Do they want to be with someone for 35 years then wake up one day and realize they don't love them or that they haven't been truly loved for the past 35 years?

How old are they? That is the real problem that people rush into getting married instead of traveling and seeing some things before hand. I didn't get married until I was in my late 30's. I know what else is out there and so I have no regrets about my choice, and hopefully never will.
They are 28 and 26. I suppose it's due to immaturity, on both their parts, but I wonder how badly they will get hurt before they realize what they are doing.
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Old 09-08-2009, 11:55 AM
 
Location: My Private Island
4,941 posts, read 7,054,635 times
Reputation: 12245
Mmmmmm......maybe the sex is REALLY good.
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Old 09-08-2009, 12:10 PM
 
Location: In my skin
8,791 posts, read 13,771,661 times
Reputation: 8693
Quote:
Originally Posted by MAtheBanker View Post
IMO, if you TRULY believe "you can't do any better", wouldn't it be better to just be SINGLE? Why would these guys settle for girls like this? I can't understand what they get out of it. Any thoughts?

By the way, both of these guys are outstanding men. They are hard working, respectful people, who deserve to be with a real woman.
People who think they can't do any better usually have a hard time being alone. And it doesn't matter how hard working or respectful they are; a "real woman" isn't going to find someone with no self-respect appealing. So, in reality, they won't be able to do any better until they actually believe it.
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Old 09-08-2009, 12:24 PM
 
951 posts, read 1,555,963 times
Reputation: 643
Quote:
Originally Posted by MAtheBanker View Post
IMO, if you TRULY believe "you can't do any better", wouldn't it be better to just be SINGLE? Why would these guys settle for girls like this? I can't understand what they get out of it. Any thoughts?
More and more, men ARE learning from other's mistakes and staying single, when the alternatives are not good. However, I doubt that a time will ever come when all men take this approach. Biology is a strong counter balance. Women I know can be quite snarky when they point this out. "It must have been the first time he got laid!" is their favorite comment.

These guys will likely become mid life converts, after they take a financial s**t kicking. They are often those who "get religion" the most and can become the most vociferous posters to anti-marriage sites.
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