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This question is primarily for the women, but I guess men can answer too. If you begin an affair with a married man and he leaves his wife for you, then how can you be sure he won't do the same thing to you? I saw a trailer for a movie coming out called The Other Woman. The main character starts sleeping with her boss and eventually he leaves his wife for her. Kinda sad that Hollywood thinks such a character would be worth watching. And in a weird case of life-imitating-art, the main character is played by an actress who's now engaged to a guy who left his live-in girlfriend of 3 years to be with her. I don't know if it's considered cheating if you leave someone for someone else, but at the very least, shouldn't it make you wonder if that person could do the same to you?
1) There's an old rule, "If a man leaves his wife to marry his mistress, all he's doing is creating a job opening."
2) I'm guessing, just based on some of the posts on this forum, that there are women who just like to sleep with married men. Maybe it's because they like the taboo aspect of it. Maybe it's because it's no-strings. Maybe because they just like to steal the men of other women
I think there are women out there who just like to poach the men of other women. When I was single and not in a relationship, it was hard to find someone. But the moment I was in a relationship with someone -- WHAM -- I'd start having phone numbers slipped to me. And don't even get me started on what happened when I got engaged to Mrs. CPG. I just couldn't believe how aggressive some women got.
I think it's cheating if you leave your spouse for someone else. I'm sure there was some messing around with the other woman before he left his wife, so I would consider that cheating. My philosophy -- once a cheater, always a cheater.
Well a live-girlfriend is not a wife. (Though I personally would not date a guy who had a live-in girlfriend.) If after living with someone for three years you still aren't married, that should tell you something about the lack of permanency in your relationship. I say that assuming that what I have read is true, that the gf wanted to get married.
As for being the other woman, I really don't understand why a woman would accept that status. Low self-esteem? And you are right, if you "win" the guy, your prize is a man who is willing to divorce you if the Bigger Better Deal comes along. No thanks. I could never sleep well being in that position.
I have no idea if the GF wanted to get married, but if the guy had any hangups about marriage, he's obviously over them now. Then again, it might have to do with the fact that his soon-to-be wife is also pregnant.
I guess some people will always walk out if something better comes along. Isn't that what happened to Brad Pitt?
I once dated a guy for a month or so, he confessed to being married while we were in the car. I didn't say a word, opened the door and left.
Never took another of his calls.
To me, in 99.9% of the cases there is never any reason to fool around (there was once a poster here who was, it was a unique case that I found understandable...). If things are so bad at home, take care of it, one way or the other.
And I do believe that if someone fools around with me, they will fool around ON me.
I think a lot of people get off on the concept that they are so special, that the person couldn't "help themselves".
I also don't believe in being a contributing factor to breaking-up families.
I think a lot of people get off on the concept that they are so special, that the person couldn't "help themselves".
Exactly. It must be a huge ego boost to know that someone dumped their current partner for you. Maybe that's why some women chase after married men. It's more about feeling like they've still got it than about the man himself.
I have no idea if the GF wanted to get married, but if the guy had any hangups about marriage, he's obviously over them now. Then again, it might have to do with the fact that his soon-to-be wife is also pregnant.
I guess some people will always walk out if something better comes along. Isn't that what happened to Brad Pitt?
I doubt he ever had hangups about marriage per se. It most likely means that he was comfortable with his live-in girlfriend, but did not see himself married to HER in particular. This happens all the time, and is why women should not wait for a man to "come around" and propose.
"I don't know what I want" usually has this implied at the end: "...but I know I don't want you." "I don't know if I am ready to get married... but I know I don't want to marry you."
I think you are right, some people are always ready to jump ship if something better comes along. We don't know whether that is the case here though.
PS: I should say I'm not excusing the guy. He sounds like a jackass to me.
I don't get the point why women do this. Sometimes, when a woman comes between a man and his g/f or wife and they happen to split, he'll leave the "other woman" too
I know someone who was the "other woman". They're still together but it doesn't allways end up that way. Usually, the "other woman" gets cheated on or things fall through
if a guy is going to leave his wife, it better be for himself...
if its simply because something new and shiney came along i wouldnt trust him as far as i could throw him as to not do it to me too...
im not interested in dating anyone who cheats...to me it says alot about that persons character and how they feel about loyalty and trust...
if hes willing to cheat on and leave his wife...then whats going to make the next relationship immune to the same process?
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