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Old 10-01-2009, 08:56 PM
 
20,379 posts, read 18,244,204 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thursday007 View Post
One should also be asking this question simultaneously - why do men have such a problem with women who make more money than they do??

I don't think the root of the issue is women looking for a man who makes more money, but a man who's looking for a woman who makes less than they do....some exceptions apply as I've met my fair share of golddigging sloths of men.
Hi Thursday007,

Apparently it may be because it will interfere with fertility. I also tended to think it may have been due to the potential mother of your children disappearing into the bear cave. The reproductive bottleneck perhaps ought not to be around us when doing stupid dangerous things.
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Old 10-01-2009, 08:58 PM
 
Location: Orlando, FL
12,201 posts, read 17,618,697 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mcb1025 View Post
I know, I know. This sounds soooo stereotypical, but I'm pretty sure I have it pegged now. Most women I've met seem to have their brains wired to think that a man is not worthy unless he has significant purchasing power.
I'm a 23 year old male, just moved to Denver after college. Given the state of the economy, I'm not rollin' in a Beemer or sportin' $10k Rolexes. I don't dress in Armani and I don't eat out a lot. Yet, it seems that everytime I meet a girl, it's the same story. First, they put on a facade and act all genuine and unmaterialistic. They say things that make you think that they're down to earth and that they just want a man to treat them well. After a couple weeks, the truth starts to trickle out. They talk about how they want to find a man that can buy them a BMW, buy them a house, and take them across the world.

Before I get the "you need to meet different women" shpeel, let me tell you I've met them in bars, churches, classrooms, book stores, etc. Everywhere you can imagine. And it all boils down to one thing...finding a man who will be able to shower them with material goodies.

Am I way off base here?
I'm equally if not more concerned with his physical goodies. Hey it's great that you can buy a Bentley but if you can't make it rock then it's a deal breaker.
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:04 PM
 
Location: San Leandro
4,576 posts, read 8,724,106 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thursday007 View Post
One should also be asking this question simultaneously - why do men have such a problem with women who make more money than they do??

I don't think the root of the issue is women looking for a man who makes more money, but a man who's looking for a woman who makes less than they do....some exceptions apply as I've met my fair share of golddigging sloths of men.

I would not want a woman making less money than I. Who would take care of the kids?
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:05 PM
 
26,143 posts, read 29,852,643 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gwynedd1 View Post
Hi Thursday007,

Apparently it may be because it will interfere with fertility. I also tended to think it may have been due to the potential mother of your children disappearing into the bear cave. The reproductive bottleneck perhaps ought not to be around us when doing stupid dangerous things.
I'm not following you -" stupid dangerous things?" disappearing into the bear cave?

While I read your thread to which these things elude to I'm having difficulty connecting them with the OP's statement on women only interested in a man's asset - which I whole heartedly disagree with and that many men cannot handle the idea the woman would make more than he....how is this stupid and dangerous?
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:06 PM
 
Location: The Jar
20,058 posts, read 17,137,705 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by natalayjones View Post
I'm equally if not more concerned with his physical goodies. Hey it's great that you can buy a Bentley but if you can't make it rock then it's a deal breaker.
Some will (and should IMO) hide those "assets" though-LOL!

Especially in this age of disease and deception. Anybody see the recent news program that showed some guy who had given HIV to countless women? And we wonder why wait?
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:18 PM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
1,420 posts, read 2,355,683 times
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Well then you have been meeting the wrong women. Its true that all women to some degree care about a potential boyfriends/husbands finances. The guy Im with currently when I met him he had a crappy minimum wage job and I was still willing to get to know him. Some women can look past those things.
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:20 PM
 
Location: California
191 posts, read 115,563 times
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Everyone's ideas are interesting! My point of view........

It sucks but it happens....some people are just materialistic.....sorry it sounds like you can't find anyone that isn't, though. I myself am a female who happens to work for a living and doesn't expect a man to provide for her. I drive a piece of crap car but it gets me to and from and it does so safely. I have never NEVER liked a guy with a sports car! I think that guys with sports cars are trying to compensate for something. I would rather have a guy driving an older car maybe less ostentatious but have him treat me right then some guy who drives a BMW and smacks me around every night when I get home for whatever stupid reason. Some woman are dumb what can I say. But not all of us are money hungry. Not all of us are wanting to be like some of the reality "Housewives of ______" wherever. My man works...I work.....we dated by going to the bowling alley and we broke down in his car on the way home from hitting up a burrito place in the middle of the night! LOL!!! Good times.

You got the right idea.....if she wants a damn BMW, rolex, or Armani, have her work for it and go buy it her DAMN SELF!!!!
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:53 PM
 
Location: NY metro area
7,795 posts, read 15,784,778 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mcb1025 View Post
...

Am I way off base here?
No.

I always requested financial statements by the 2nd date.
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:58 PM
 
20,379 posts, read 18,244,204 times
Reputation: 8022
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thursday007 View Post
I'm not following you -" stupid dangerous things?" disappearing into the bear cave?

While I read your thread to which these things elude to I'm having difficulty connecting them with the OP's statement on women only interested in a man's asset - which I whole heartedly disagree with and that many men cannot handle the idea the woman would make more than he....how is this stupid and dangerous?
Greetings Thursday007,

I don't happen to believe we are simply intellectual beings. Perhaps I read too much Schopenhauer (The primacy of the will dominates the intellect. The will is to survive) but I believe men have instinctive drives not necessarily rationalizing the actual behaviour women engage in as bread winners. It appears even stress alone matters. I am even curious how it would affect me. I rationally see no problem with it but I do wonder if psychological states would emerge nonetheless.
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:59 PM
 
Location: Portland, OR
1,657 posts, read 4,283,540 times
Reputation: 907
WOW, did I ever miss the boat on this thread...

I read the OP, came up with my answer, and then started to read all the replies. Boy, was my reply way off base. Here I read: 1) moved to Denver right after college; 2) young man; and 3) searching for a woman for a LTR. At the bottom, I added my thoughts. You can see I am way, WAY, out in 'Left' field. Have a good laugh on me.

Obviously, the OP has been selecting from the same pool of young women regardless of the specific location of meeting them. Also, the OP seems to be hyper-sensitive on the conversation value of the Women asking about his social-economic status and potential for staying, or rising upward, from his current social-economic status.

Phil

*******
the following is from the perspective of my personal life: In the heartland of the USA, there is a huge amount of social-economic stratification by way of the Suburbs and the automobile. The easiest way to gain social status is of course money, your job, the clubs (or social contacts) you join. But there is also education, artistic talent, and other highly regarded, but limited pay jobs like veterinarian, archaeologist, and classical concert musician that provide prestige instead of pay. Yada, Yada, Yada.

A young woman who grew up in Upper-Middle income family, in a well to do suburb, went to a very good high school, which in turn allowed her to attend a high status University with national ranking football and other NCAA sports. In short she grew up and lived her life in a social-privileged environment. Why would she want to go to a less prestigious living conditions where she would not have friends in that lower social-economic stratus? (BTW: visit the meat department of the same grocery chain in two distinct priced neighborhoods, compare the quality and quantity of the steaks. Guess which most people would rather shop at.)

So, ask your self this: are you working on your PhD? Are you working on the draft of your 1st published book and your editor wants to see your next re-write? Artistic show coming up? 1st semester teaching at local community college with your new Masters degree? No, it is not all about money, but money DOES buy prestige. It is, IMHO, all about providing security (by way of prestige, however you get it) in maintaining social status in a broader culture that has a lot focus on stratification by suburban housing neighborhoods.

If you want to ignore and reject the whole social-economic stratification suburban bit, you need to find a community that is not hung up with suburban growth and economic stratification. That is one, of several, reason why I moved to Portland, OR. YMMV with other cities in the USA. But at least there is a choice in the USA of the communities we choose to live. I doubt there will be a lot of people who would find Portland a good choice for their way of life, but for enough, Portland is becoming overcrowded.

BTW: yes I am a Liberal.
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