U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 1.5 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Jump to a detailed profile or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Business Search - 14 Million verified businesses
Search for:  near: 
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 11-05-2009, 12:49 PM
 
Location: Back in the gym...Yo Adrian!
8,851 posts, read 10,592,354 times
Reputation: 16353
If by no fault of his own he lost his job and took on the role of house-husband while seeking other employment I think that's totally acceptable. However, for me personally, I could not be a stay at home dad while my spouse goes out and earns, at least not if I had a choice. I've been offered that deal before and declined, it's not for me. I wouldn't like to feel as though I was kept in that way, and at some point you can bet your sweet bottom that in an argument that arrangement will come to the surface in some degrading way. Like others have said, there are always exceptions to the rule, but for the most part I think a man should get out and support his family.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 11-06-2009, 12:30 AM
 
Location: Arkansas
2,384 posts, read 3,971,110 times
Reputation: 1078
I couldn't deal with a househusband or stay-at-home dad. Not to knock anyone who is, but I was not brought up that way so it would be akward for me. We actually have 3 stay-at-home fathers in my neighborhood and they are great to have around during the day to fix things and what-not, but I couldn't be married to any of them!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2009, 12:43 AM
 
214 posts, read 436,904 times
Reputation: 209
I wouldn't have a problem with it provided it made sense for our situation. I do admit however, I'd rather be the one staying home and doing the domestic thing so I know it would be difficult for me to not resent him for it.

To me, there is a big difference in a spouse (either gender) staying home because as a couple they've decided it makes sense for their situation and one staying home because as an individual they have decided they don't want to work.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2009, 12:44 AM
 
Location: Florida
1,775 posts, read 2,165,403 times
Reputation: 890
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kazz View Post
How come women go on about how hard it is managing the household and looking after the kids,but if it's a man doing it,he's sitting on his butt being taken care of?
I do have to agree with this. Especially considering that even if the man is the sole breadwinner, usually he'll still be doing a good portion of the housework..... rodents, plumbing, caulking, carpentry, lawn, cars, major repairs.... not to say that some women can't do that, but usually the man is the one doing that sort of stuff.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2009, 07:41 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
12,736 posts, read 9,865,932 times
Reputation: 19392
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kazz View Post
How come women go on about how hard it is managing the household and looking after the kids,but if it's a man doing it,he's sitting on his butt being taken care of?
Conversely, how come men feel that a man doing housework is demeaning, but it isn't demeaning when a woman does it?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2009, 07:42 AM
 
7,255 posts, read 5,712,758 times
Reputation: 6342
This world has given us all a curveball. Job losses and all.

There seems to be a tack team sorta team now. Man working out of the house. Woman gets job and man losses job. Switching roles and such.

It's a tough world. I think we all have to adapt to whatever happens now a days. We are in survival mode.

If he is refusing to work outside the home it's alot different then if he can't find work.

Most "real" men want to work outside the house.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2009, 07:46 AM
 
3,538 posts, read 4,230,412 times
Reputation: 2400
Quote:
Originally Posted by th3vault View Post
I do have to agree with this. Especially considering that even if the man is the sole breadwinner, usually he'll still be doing a good portion of the housework..... rodents, plumbing, caulking, carpentry, lawn, cars, major repairs.... not to say that some women can't do that, but usually the man is the one doing that sort of stuff.
You have a point. My wife can do some things, but a lot of things fall on me to do. She'll attempt caulking and painting, but I end up fixing it.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2009, 07:48 AM
 
3,538 posts, read 4,230,412 times
Reputation: 2400
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kazz View Post
How come women go on about how hard it is managing the household and looking after the kids,but if it's a man doing it,he's sitting on his butt being taken care of?
That is how they view it. Heck even my wife can't figure out why I'm tired when it is her that has the long work day and the really long commute leaving me to take care of everything else. She doesn't "see" what I go through every day.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2009, 08:20 AM
 
Location: Cumberland Co., TN
10,886 posts, read 10,622,969 times
Reputation: 10889
I think it would be heavenly. I have always worked, before marriage, and during both marriages and I suspect I will work till the day I fall over dead. On top of working, I have also done 99% of child care and house work and yard work. If I were to have a lapse of sanity and marry again, I would want a stay at home husband. Im salivating thinking about having my breakfast cooked and clothes laid out for me in the morning then after 8 hrs. come home to a clean house, clean laundry, beds made and a hot meal then sit on the couch and watch tv while he cleans up the kitchen and brings me a beer. Not have to worry about doing the shopping and paying bills or making appointments, gardening and canning or mending clothes. And I wouldnt be the one expected to cook for church socials and family reunions, buy the christmas, wedding and graduation gifts or decorate and cook for the holidays.

Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2009, 08:26 AM
 
Location: Back in the gym...Yo Adrian!
8,851 posts, read 10,592,354 times
Reputation: 16353
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2mares View Post
I think it would be heavenly. I have always worked, before marriage, and during both marriages and I suspect I will work till the day I fall over dead. On top of working, I have also done 99% of child care and house work and yard work. If I were to have a lapse of sanity and marry again, I would want a stay at home husband. Im salivating thinking about having my breakfast cooked and clothes laid out for me in the morning then after 8 hrs. come home to a clean house, clean laundry, beds made and a hot meal then sit on the couch and watch tv while he cleans up the kitchen and brings me a beer. Not have to worry about doing the shopping and paying bills or making appointments, gardening and canning or mending clothes. And I wouldnt be the one expected to cook for church socials and family reunions, buy the christmas, wedding and graduation gifts or decorate and cook for the holidays.
I don't know many housewives who do all those things you've listed, so I'm not so sure the stay-at-home deal is all inclusive. I don't think I'd know what to think or feel if a woman had my breakfast made for me in the morning and dinner on the table when I got home...I'd have to pinch myself to see if I wasn't dreaming. I'd have to look around and make sure I didn't walk into the wrong house.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $79,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2014, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 - Top